Gaffs, snorts, spits and other embarrassing RPG moments.

[Zappo]

Ooh, I've got another one.

We were gaming at my place, and being thirsty we decided to open a bottle of coke. We had a six bottles pack, and you know how they're arranged in three couples of bottles, each couple taped together. So my friend picks up the two bottles and begins twisting and turning them to get the tape off. After a while he gives up and gets a knife to cut the tape.

In a fairly successful, though not in the way he meant it, attempt to be funny, he stabbed the tape with the knife, pierced through it and into the bottle, which promptly exploded showering half the room with coke.

Luckily, it was sitting on the floor so the table protected the sheets and books.

 

[Spud]

Many years ago (when we were younger) our DM (who to be fair is usually quite intelligent) had gone to considerable time and trouble to map out the entire dungeon we were hacking about in at the time using dungeon floor plans.
He was enormously pleased with himself, and to be honest it did look impressive, up until the point where we pointed out that we could spot the secret doors a mile off as he'd covered them up with blue tack!
D'oh as someone would say.

 

[Henry]

Very simple story for us.

The Game: Star Wars
The DM: one of the other gamers.

The DM was describing a crime boss to us, by the name of Big Gizz. Only one problem: He kept pronouncing the name of the big, tough ganster boss with a soft "G" sound, and the rest of us couldn't stop laughing long enough to tell him why.


Even funnier: We have it on tape.

 

[wolff96]

Okay, to explain this one, I have to give a bit of background.

The party rogue (new to D&D) got into a tussle with some other shady characters in a back-alley of the city. They were trying to mug him, so he killed them all in a single round. (Two attacks and an AoO, very lucky.)

After searching the bodies -- still standing in plain sight of the main road that they were near -- he decides to CHANGE HIS CLOTHES because his outfit had bloodstains on it. A wonderful idea, except that he's still standing in an alley right off of a main street.

Later that night, the player who hadn't made it to the beginning of the session showed up. So while the rogue's player is telling this story, the rest of the group is nearly in tears laughing. Right then, the DM's wife walks into the room just in time to hear "and then I took off my pants. Right there on main street!"

As if she didn't already think we were weird enough...

-----------------------------------------

Of course, my best is the time I was tossing a pencil up in the air and it stuck in the ceiling. We left it there to see how long it would stay there.

Later in the evening, I sort of tripped while getting ready to sit down. To regain my balance, I had to drop a book to catch myself on the chair. The impact of the book knocked the pencil loose from the ceiling. It dropped point first onto my skull.

Head wounds sure are bloody, especially for something so stupid as being stabbed by your own pencil.

 

[haiiro]

I can think of two things, both dice-related:

When I returned home from the gaming store with my first serious purchases - the 2e PHB, DMG, MC1, Time of the Dragon boxed set and some dice - I decided to roll up a sample character without really reading the rules. After all, I had played some OD&D, right?

I picked a fighter. I decided to roll his hit points first...and got a 0. After scratching my head for a minute, I called the friend who had gotten me started on D&D and asked him if my character started the game dead.

For my first several sessions as a DM, I read d4s by picking them up and totalling the numbers on the bottom face - which meant wizards got some weird hit points indeed.