Good players, bad schedules

[Jon_Dahl]

For the past six months I've had problems with my players. They are all good guys, there's a great harmony and we seem to enjoy gaming. But the schedules that they impose really make me tear my hair out.

One of the players has said that he will never play if there's a day off. This also includes eves of such days. So no Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays ever. Also the other player has ruled out weekends. Now Easter is coming and try to get us to play during that time when people generally have nothing but time to kill (places are closed), but "no".

What we have here is the girlfriend/boyfriend-dilemma. Both players are dating and they spend every second they can to be with their partner. I'm involved in a long-distance relationship and I've never understood this kind of "if we don't stare each other all the time we're gonna die"-style of dating. In my opinion these kinds of relationships are frankly doomed because the strong pace of the relationship is bound to slow down at some point and it's going to be hard to adjust to the fact that the other person is no longer willing to stare at your face 24/7/365.

So we only play after normal working days. I work 8 hours a day and it pisses me off that I know that there's never ever a chance of having a Saturday of roleplaying. Now I have to choose between not playing or working a full day and then roleplaying the whole evening. I'm afraid to bring up this problem with my players because... you know... love is blind.

Please tell me I'm not the only one with these sort of problems.

 

[humble minion]

You're not. My group hasn't managed to get together for a single session since mid December. Work, health problems, family issues, etc, and the longer you go without playing, the more distant it gets in people's minds and the easier it is to put it off for just one more week.

We're trying to address the problem now, but damned if I know what the solution is. A change of nights, longer but more infrequent sessions, weekend sessions - damned if I know. Incredibly frustrating. I'm the GM and I was hoping to be finished this campaign long ago - though to be fair I've had my share of times when it's been me that cancelled. And it always seems like the excuse is perfectly reasonable.

You're not alone though.

 

[Michael Silverbane]

Is there some reason that you can't play with them (on, say Wednesday) and then play with another group on your preferred day?

 

[OSEZNO]

Is there some reason that you can't play with them (on, say Wednesday) and then play with another group on your preferred day?

I think the idea is that he doesn't want to play when he's exhausted from work and they don't want to play on their 'personal' time, it may also be a way for them to unwind.

Ultimately, it doesn't matter why they won't play weekends. It only matters if they're completely inflexible about it and you find it intolerable to play on weekdays.

If they are immovable and you hate running the game after work, don't run it. The game is clearly not that important to them.

Certainly bring it up though.

 

[Crothian]

That sounds like us. We don't play on weekends or on Holidays. Those are for families especially the guys with kids.

 

[Echohawk]

I designed the format of my current campaign specifically to deal with scheduling problems. Or, more accurately, to deal with two problems:

1. It is very hard to synchronize diaries of a group of five-seven adults.
2. I have more players wanting to play than is quite comfortable for a single group.

Hence the Lockenport Irregulars format:

• Each player has one (or more) characters who are members of the adventurers' guild in the city of Lockenport.
• I plan each adventure to fit in a single game session (or very occasionally to span two game sessions that are close to each other).
• A "mission briefing" for each adventure gets posted to the Irregulars guild notice board (i.e. a mailing list for players) a few weeks before the planned game.
• Players who are available on that particular weekend or public holiday confirm their availability and decide which character they will be playing (if they have more than one).
• While each adventure is self-contained, I have still been able to build up a bit of meta-plot for the campaign. Mission debriefings are posted to our wiki after each session, so that folks who didn't play that game can get an idea of what happened.

This campaign format has worked really well for us, and I've even run a couple of sessions for some (mostly) new players who were interested in D&D but don't necessarily have time to play regularly. Several of those have signed up for subsequent Irregulars missions, as their schedules permitted.

It can be a bit challenging to plan adventures that start and finish in a single session, but I've found that this requirement has actually improved the quality of the games. I'm forced to work towards a logic conclusion of the adventure before the game stops, and that has meant that the pace is usually faster and more engaging for the players. (I usually plan at least one encounter that can be easily dropped without breaking the plot.)

 

[Morrus]

So we only play after normal working days. I work 8 hours a day and it pisses me off that I know that there's never ever a chance of having a Saturday of roleplaying. Now I have to choose between not playing or working a full day and then roleplaying the whole evening. I'm afraid to bring up this problem with my players because... you know... love is blind.

I don't really see the issue. We only get to play on Thursday nights. People have families, careers, children, social lives. We agree to Thursday nights and it works. I've certainly never pined that I can't play on a Tuesday afternoon or a Saturday.

And, uh, yeah - we like to spend time with our wives and girlfriends, too. Sorry! Some of them even like to spend time with their kids.

Just talk it out and find a regular time amenable to all. If there's no such time, that's unfortunate, but there's not much you can do about it. We (well, at least I - I don't want to speak for the others) enjoy the time not just as a game, but as time to spend with my friends. The game just happens to be the activity we like doing.

And I wouldn't be playing on Easter weekend, either, if the game were at weekends. Lots of equally important stuff goes on that weekend; some people do family stuff and other people do religious stuff (plus Doctor Who aways returns Easter Saturday, and nothing will keep me away from that!)

 

[Dice4Hire]

I voted find a new group.

Because, hey, for me, that is the only time I can play, and as I usually run the games, well.


My group plays on Saturday nights, and as I work Saturday, and Mon to Fri to boot, it is stress relief, but I understand that for most people Saturday night is for drinking, movies, drinking, dates, drinking, going out, dr .... you get the idea.

But if it is, you are not getting a place at my table. Simple enough. You can find another table.

 

[Zhaleskra]

I've never had the exact issue in the poll show up. What I did have was being a player in a group where one player started having trouble showing up. Eventually, the GM ended the campaign early and told us how things would have gone, because that player had the only character who took d20 Modern's healing skills.

Another group I was in parted ways because of not being able to find a day that the most people had available to game.

No weekends would be a red flag for me because at my current job I only get every other weekend off, and work evenings on the weekdays. Sometimes things work out so I have a long break in between both parts of the shift, but it's hard to schedule a game around that.

 

[Olaf the Stout]

I don't really see the issue. We only get to play on Thursday nights. People have families, careers, children, social lives. We agree to Thursday nights and it works. I've certainly never pined that I can't play on a Tuesday afternoon or a Saturday.

And, uh, yeah - we like to spend time with our wives and girlfriends, too. Sorry! Some of them even like to spend time with their kids.

Just talk it out and find a regular time amenable to all. If there's no such time, that's unfortunate, but there's not much you can do about it. We (well, at least I - I don't want to speak for the others) enjoy the time not just as a game, but as time to spend with my friends. The game just happens to be the activity we like doing.

And I wouldn't be playing on Easter weekend, either, if the game were at weekends. Lots of equally important stuff goes on that weekend; some people do family stuff and other people do religious stuff (plus Doctor Who aways returns Easter Saturday, and nothing will keep me away from that!)

Yep, that pretty much sums up my situation. I only game once a fortnight on a weeknight (Thursday nights at the moment). I'm married with 2 children. My wife doesn't play so telling her that I would be gaming every Saturday really wouldn't fly.

3 of my other players are married with children and are likely to be in a similar situation. Out of the remaining 2 other players I think 1 already has a Saturday game. In any case, it just wouldn't work for my group. Playing weeknights has worked for us for about 5 years now and I'm not about to change that. Your situation may be different of course.

I'm happy enough with gaming as much as I do. Would I like to game more often? Definitely! Do I realise that I need to balance my gaming time with my family time? Yep, that's why I only play once a fortnight!

Once or twice a year I have a full-day gaming session on a Saturday. Otherwise though I'm just too busy with family and other non-related gaming things. There definitely wouldn't be any Easter gaming happening. I go away camping with the family for Easter and I imagine the rest of my group would be busy spending time with their families if I was actually free anyway.

Olaf the Stout