Michael Morris
First Post
I'm feeling goofy tonight.
To the tune of "Gangsta Paradise"
As I walk through the valley where the goblins are slain
I take a look at my ax and realize it's very plain
But that's perfect for dwarven fighters like me
You know I shun fancy things like a flameberge +3
At 4:30 in the morning I'm cracking skulls
Timmy fires up his wand to burn up the trolls - fool
And I've been hack'n and slash'n so long that
Even the warmage thinks that my mind is gone
I got a lawful alignment - I'm into discipline
A heavy axe in one hand and a beard on my chin
So why don't go take their left flank
And I'll take their right
And we'll commence to chopping like it's 1399
I been spendin most my life
Livin in hack and slash paradise
I've killed ogres once or twice
Livin in hack and slash paradise
And those damn rust monsters bite
Livin in hack and slash paradise
And I kill all day and night
Livin in hack and slash paradise...
A kobold tried to kick me in the butt last week
I just smiled and turned him into hamburger meat
I didn't really mind in fact I found it swell
It took an hour to send his eighty bros off to hell
Now I have never spared a orc even if he deserved it
A good aligned porker? You know that's unheard of
I wear plate armor and I gotta cool axe
And my homies agree I really look good in matte - fool.
If you come to visit you'll succum to tears
Cause none of us has had a bath in the last thirty years.
But we ain't really mean, so please don't gawk and stare
We're just socialogically impared
There's no guns, no bombs, no hand grenades
Just blades as you can see
Like Conan the Barbarian
It's slashing festivity
We been spending most our lives livin in Hack n slash paradise
We chop heads at discount prices livin in Hack n slash paradise
And don't fear we do not bite livin in Hack n slash paradise
But watch out for troglodytes livin in hack n slash paradise
Hacking up the goblins, chopping up the bugbears,
Killed a giant Monday, soon topple another
think you're high level
think your spells are sweet?
Well to my ax your just another slab of meat
I'm the crazy dwarf all the dwarflings wanna be like
Chop'n hands, knees, and feets scoring XP left and right
so don't be vain, and don't be whiney,
or else my brother might have to get medieval on your hiney.
We've been spending most our lives living in Hack & Slash Paradise
We're all dwarves for hire right, livin in Hack & Slash Paradise
We chug beer and start bar fights livin in Hack & Slash Paradise
And it really is the life livin in Hack & Slash Paradise...
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
ah-ah
ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah,
SPLAT!!!!
To the tune of "Gangsta Paradise"
As I walk through the valley where the goblins are slain
I take a look at my ax and realize it's very plain
But that's perfect for dwarven fighters like me
You know I shun fancy things like a flameberge +3
At 4:30 in the morning I'm cracking skulls
Timmy fires up his wand to burn up the trolls - fool
And I've been hack'n and slash'n so long that
Even the warmage thinks that my mind is gone
I got a lawful alignment - I'm into discipline
A heavy axe in one hand and a beard on my chin
So why don't go take their left flank
And I'll take their right
And we'll commence to chopping like it's 1399
I been spendin most my life
Livin in hack and slash paradise
I've killed ogres once or twice
Livin in hack and slash paradise
And those damn rust monsters bite
Livin in hack and slash paradise
And I kill all day and night
Livin in hack and slash paradise...
A kobold tried to kick me in the butt last week
I just smiled and turned him into hamburger meat
I didn't really mind in fact I found it swell
It took an hour to send his eighty bros off to hell
Now I have never spared a orc even if he deserved it
A good aligned porker? You know that's unheard of
I wear plate armor and I gotta cool axe
And my homies agree I really look good in matte - fool.
If you come to visit you'll succum to tears
Cause none of us has had a bath in the last thirty years.
But we ain't really mean, so please don't gawk and stare
We're just socialogically impared
There's no guns, no bombs, no hand grenades
Just blades as you can see
Like Conan the Barbarian
It's slashing festivity
We been spending most our lives livin in Hack n slash paradise
We chop heads at discount prices livin in Hack n slash paradise
And don't fear we do not bite livin in Hack n slash paradise
But watch out for troglodytes livin in hack n slash paradise
Hacking up the goblins, chopping up the bugbears,
Killed a giant Monday, soon topple another
think you're high level
think your spells are sweet?
Well to my ax your just another slab of meat
I'm the crazy dwarf all the dwarflings wanna be like
Chop'n hands, knees, and feets scoring XP left and right
so don't be vain, and don't be whiney,
or else my brother might have to get medieval on your hiney.
We've been spending most our lives living in Hack & Slash Paradise
We're all dwarves for hire right, livin in Hack & Slash Paradise
We chug beer and start bar fights livin in Hack & Slash Paradise
And it really is the life livin in Hack & Slash Paradise...
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
ah-ah
ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah,
SPLAT!!!!
Last edited:
(Since you don't have anything better to do with your time... 
)
