A Birthday Limerick
The older that piratecats get,
The more they makes trips to the vet.
'Cause they often complain
of some phantom-hand pain,
And the smell of their fur when it's wet.
A Birthday Haiku
Did you lose your eye
Cleaning with that one hook hand?
Is your tongue pierced, too?
A Birthday Sonnet
How is Piratecat like the rolling sea?
He's big, and deep and smells a bit like fish.
He's full of sharks and sea anenomes
And more shipwrecks than you could ever wish.
Perhaps that last quatrain was quite a stretch,
There's not too many things that rhyme with fish.
Oh crap! I'm now so mad that I could wretch!
I think I will, into this—plastic dish!
I thought it would be nice to write a poem
Composed with cheer and all my best wishes
But now I'm stuck with little room to roam
Away from rhymes other than those with -ish...es.
I'll say (with risk of getting called a dunce)
A cat this good you don't eat all at once.