How commonly is the GM actually the ultimate arbiter?

[Darkness]

Haven't run anything in recent months, but...

I don't usually run games where I don't have a great deal of authority regarding setting, rules, character creation options, etc., but it's not absolute or anything; if I can accomodate a player request that's even close to reasonable, I probably will unless I have an actual reason not to.

As for actual play... On one hand, I'm aiming to hurt the PCs. On the other hand, I'm not going to sweat the small stuff.

(Note: That's 'hurt,' not 'kill.' The dead tend to be beyond suffering, so from my point of view there's no point in actively trying to kill PCs.)

 

[Elf Witch]

I guess we are old school in the fact that the DM has a lot of authority. He has the final say on sits at the table. As for house rules we talk about them but the DM gets the final say. Now we have never thrown anyone out of the game and none of the DMs myself included have ever forced am unpopular house rule on the payers if they totally hate it.

 

[Morrus]

I guess we are old school in the fact that the DM has a lot of authority. He has the final say on sits at the table.

Do you play at his home?

 

[MJS]

In my game, players are not allowed flatulence, each given a plug bearing the words "ultimate arbiter".

 

[evilbob]

It's interesting to hear people talking about the right of "kicking." Personally, I've never experienced a game where a player was kicked out. On the other hand, I know this hobby: I know there are people out there that deserve to be kicked out of a game from time to time.

That's not to say there are no people with whom I will no longer play. There is one person in particular that I long ago swore off GMing for, ever again. But there was never a moment of "kicking" this person out. I just stopped inviting them to game when I was GMing. Maybe that's the same thing? Somehow it seems like there's a subtle distinction there. I'm not enforcing anything on this person: I am removing myself from a situation in which I know I won't be comfortable/happy. Our groups have been fluid enough (games rarely last longer than a year) and our lives busy enough that we have that luxury, I guess. Actually, I guess another factor is that no one has been attached enough to one game that if it causes the entire game to dissolve so that we can no longer play with someone who needs to be kicked, then that's fine with everyone. The "fun" of the game is definitely bigger than the game itself. Maybe it's the same thing in the end?

 

[Zhaleskra]

I'm sure I mentioned this once before in some other topic, but when I was in college, I was running a Planescape game. One of my friends just wanted his character to seduce the Lady of Pain. After telling him the exact consequences of such an action, I forbade him from playing in that game. This all happened in a one-on-one conversation where none of my other college buddies could contribute. I am still friends with this person.

 

[Halivar]

Have never kicked anyone so much as awkwardly not invite them back. A DM has ultimate authority, but not being a jerk is part of being a good DM, IMHO.

 

[Darkness]

It's interesting to hear people talking about the right of "kicking." Personally, I've never experienced a game where a player was kicked out.

I've never kicked out a player, either. In fact, I don't think removing a player from one of my campaigns ever occurred to me. Of course, I've mostly played with friends...

 

[Mishihari Lord]

The social nature of the game makes a big difference. If you have a group that only gets together for RPGs and doesn't otherwise socialize, the DM can usually pretty much decide who stays and who goes. If you're a bunch of friends who play RPGs as one of your activities together such action usually requires group consensus.

As DM, I've always believed that I have ultimate authority. After reflecting, though, I don't recall a single time that I tried to enforce my will unilaterally over anything more than an in-game ruling. It always seemed like less work to get the rest of my group to buy into my position.

 

[Elf Witch]

Do you play at his home?

We have more than one DM right now myself and my roommate do the most DMing and no we don't play at our place. I see what you are getting at and of course we would respect the host desires after all it is his house. This really rarely comes up since we are friends outside of gaming.

Our way of thinking is that is not a good idea to force a DM to DM someone who makes the job miserable. I have good friend who plays in my roommate game I play with him but I refuse to DM for him because he sees everything in black and white and my games have a lot of gray in them. He really has no desire to play a game I run so there is no issue but if there was under our rules as DM I could simply say nope don't want him in my game.