silentspace
First Post
dreaded_beast said:
What kind of situation do you mean? Sounds like she took the time off to read the rules, and wanted to play, so I don't see what the problem is.
How do you mentally prepare yourself to DM? or Help me save my player!
- Thread starter dreaded_beast
- Start date
What kind of situation do you mean? Sounds like she took the time off to read the rules, and wanted to play, so I don't see what the problem is.
silentspace
First Post
dreaded_beast said:(Side note: Now I know why my old DM was pissed off all the time)
If your old DM was pissed off all the time, try not to use him as a role model. It's natural to get upset when things aren't going as you'd like them to, but you have to learn to let it go and just have fun. It sounds like you have players who really want to play and have fun. They're even going out of their way to make you happy! (Going off and reading rules for an hour is not really fun for most people.) So try to focus on the fun and don't get so worked up if someone doesn't know the rules as well as you'd like. Help the newbie along. Knowledge of the rules and efficient play aren't everything.
Derulbaskul
Adventurer
I think the first thing to do is make sure you're relaxed before the game.
Next, try and win the players' confidence. Have a set piece encounter that uses a variety of rules: tripping, bullrushing, balance checks etc..., but carefully research those rules and take effective notes before running the encounter. And when you run the encounter, walk the players through it; teach them as you go. They will then learn you have a good grasp of some of the more obscure stuff... and then you will find it easier to have your later rulings accepted without argument.
I realise that this suggestion is contrary to other suggestions to "keep it simple" but if you start like this you will convince the players that you can competently deal with difficult situations. That makes the "simple stuff" that much easier to run.
As for the inevitable arguments, relax, and don't take it personally. Also, once you win the players' confidence sometimes you can simply say, "Let's not get bogged down here. I think it works this way. If I am wrong I'll compensate you later." I offer to pay a luck point (house rules mechanic but similar enough to other luck/fate/hero point systems out there) if I get a call like this egregiously wrong.
Also, don't be afraid to sit down with the player between games or to exchange emails. I have a few really argumentative players in the three groups I DM (basically, two have lots of RPG experience but sometimes wonder why our 3.5E games use different rules to 1E and 2E... really... and one just isn't particuarly intelligent so each week we, for example, have to go through the rules for spell penetration/resistance checks) but I've been managing the games to reduce the amount of time spent on these arguments by using a combination of tactics: emails and 'phone calls between games, asking other players to assist with the "player management" etc....
Anyway, DMing is convincing others that you are both confident and competent... a lot like real life, I suppose. Preparation is also a key. If you're well-prepared it is much, much easier to be confident.
One last thing: after DMing for 20+ years I still find that the most fun that can be had from a night's gaming is on my side of the screen. There's nothing more satisfying in an RPG sense than --managing-- a great night of gaming with tension, fun, intrigue, wonder etc....
Next, try and win the players' confidence. Have a set piece encounter that uses a variety of rules: tripping, bullrushing, balance checks etc..., but carefully research those rules and take effective notes before running the encounter. And when you run the encounter, walk the players through it; teach them as you go. They will then learn you have a good grasp of some of the more obscure stuff... and then you will find it easier to have your later rulings accepted without argument.
I realise that this suggestion is contrary to other suggestions to "keep it simple" but if you start like this you will convince the players that you can competently deal with difficult situations. That makes the "simple stuff" that much easier to run.
As for the inevitable arguments, relax, and don't take it personally. Also, once you win the players' confidence sometimes you can simply say, "Let's not get bogged down here. I think it works this way. If I am wrong I'll compensate you later." I offer to pay a luck point (house rules mechanic but similar enough to other luck/fate/hero point systems out there) if I get a call like this egregiously wrong.
Also, don't be afraid to sit down with the player between games or to exchange emails. I have a few really argumentative players in the three groups I DM (basically, two have lots of RPG experience but sometimes wonder why our 3.5E games use different rules to 1E and 2E... really... and one just isn't particuarly intelligent so each week we, for example, have to go through the rules for spell penetration/resistance checks) but I've been managing the games to reduce the amount of time spent on these arguments by using a combination of tactics: emails and 'phone calls between games, asking other players to assist with the "player management" etc....
Anyway, DMing is convincing others that you are both confident and competent... a lot like real life, I suppose. Preparation is also a key. If you're well-prepared it is much, much easier to be confident.
One last thing: after DMing for 20+ years I still find that the most fun that can be had from a night's gaming is on my side of the screen. There's nothing more satisfying in an RPG sense than --managing-- a great night of gaming with tension, fun, intrigue, wonder etc....
Derulbaskul
Adventurer
I think the first thing to do is make sure you're relaxed before the game.
Next, try and win the players' confidence. Have a set piece encounter that uses a variety of rules: tripping, bullrushing, balance checks etc..., but carefully research those rules and take effective notes before running the encounter. And when you run the encounter, walk the players through it; teach them as you go. They will then learn you have a good grasp of some of the more obscure stuff... and then you will find it easier to have your later rulings accepted without argument.
I realise that this suggestion is contrary to other suggestions to "keep it simple" but if you start like this you will convince the players that you can competently deal with difficult situations. That makes the "simple stuff" that much easier to run.
As for the inevitable arguments, relax, and don't take it personally. Also, once you win the players' confidence sometimes you can simply say, "Let's not get bogged down here. I think it works this way. If I am wrong I'll compensate you later." I offer to pay a luck point (house rules mechanic but similar enough to other luck/fate/hero point systems out there) if I get a call like this egregiously wrong.
Also, don't be afraid to sit down with the player between games or to exchange emails. I have a few really argumentative players in the three groups I DM (basically, two have lots of RPG experience but sometimes wonder why our 3.5E games use different rules to 1E and 2E... really... and one just isn't particuarly intelligent so each week we, for example, have to go through the rules for spell penetration/resistance checks) but I've been managing the games to reduce the amount of time spent on these arguments by using a combination of tactics: emails and 'phone calls between games, asking other players to assist with the "player management" etc....
Anyway, DMing is convincing others that you are both confident and competent... a lot like real life, I suppose. Preparation is also a key. If you're well-prepared it is much, much easier to be confident.
One last thing: after DMing for 20+ years I still find that the most fun that can be had from a night's gaming is on my side of the screen. There's nothing more satisfying in an RPG sense than --managing-- a great night of gaming with tension, fun, intrigue, wonder etc....
Next, try and win the players' confidence. Have a set piece encounter that uses a variety of rules: tripping, bullrushing, balance checks etc..., but carefully research those rules and take effective notes before running the encounter. And when you run the encounter, walk the players through it; teach them as you go. They will then learn you have a good grasp of some of the more obscure stuff... and then you will find it easier to have your later rulings accepted without argument.
I realise that this suggestion is contrary to other suggestions to "keep it simple" but if you start like this you will convince the players that you can competently deal with difficult situations. That makes the "simple stuff" that much easier to run.
As for the inevitable arguments, relax, and don't take it personally. Also, once you win the players' confidence sometimes you can simply say, "Let's not get bogged down here. I think it works this way. If I am wrong I'll compensate you later." I offer to pay a luck point (house rules mechanic but similar enough to other luck/fate/hero point systems out there) if I get a call like this egregiously wrong.
Also, don't be afraid to sit down with the player between games or to exchange emails. I have a few really argumentative players in the three groups I DM (basically, two have lots of RPG experience but sometimes wonder why our 3.5E games use different rules to 1E and 2E... really... and one just isn't particuarly intelligent so each week we, for example, have to go through the rules for spell penetration/resistance checks) but I've been managing the games to reduce the amount of time spent on these arguments by using a combination of tactics: emails and 'phone calls between games, asking other players to assist with the "player management" etc....
Anyway, DMing is convincing others that you are both confident and competent... a lot like real life, I suppose. Preparation is also a key. If you're well-prepared it is much, much easier to be confident.
One last thing: after DMing for 20+ years I still find that the most fun that can be had from a night's gaming is on my side of the screen. There's nothing more satisfying in an RPG sense than --managing-- a great night of gaming with tension, fun, intrigue, wonder etc....
dreaded_beast
First Post
Thanks for all the great advice everyone!
I spoke with my player and we were able to work everything out.
I like all the advice I've been given so far, and I will be sure to try some of the suggestions!
I spoke with my player and we were able to work everything out.
I like all the advice I've been given so far, and I will be sure to try some of the suggestions!
dreaded_beast said:
Some people learn better by doing than by reading.
I would suggest that you try showing your player around the combat rules by running a few 'pit fights' with throwaway characters. Knock up a few fighters, fighter-rogues etc specialised for different tactics (eg. reach specialist, bull-rush specialist, grappler…), stick them in a pit, and guide your player through a couple of one-on-ones, a couple of two-on ones, and a two-on-two. She'll learn faster than by reading page after page of dense text, get familiar with the procedures, and feel her way around without losing any characters she care about.
An evening of dummy runs like this can be invaluable in saving people from making mistakes that they care about.
Regards,
Agback
BSF
Explorer
Wow, new DM looking for a it of advice. Cool! Dealing with rules issues & player conflict is part of the not-as-fun aspects pf being a DM. So, my advice on that is simple. Focus on having fun and communicate. Most problems can be solved by calm, rational communication. Don't be afraid to toss out rules, or make them up if you don't know them, in the interest of fun. However, you need to remember that the spotlight should be on the PC's. Do not ever get so attached to an NPC that you are afraid to let them die.
Now, on to your question on how to mentally prepare to DM. That is an interesting question that I have never thought of in those terms before. For me, it is mostly anticipation. I try to come up with cool NPC's, cool items, cool story devices, cool scenes, cool what have you. Something that I will enjoy playing with and can look forward to. As I go through the week, I think about how I will run that through the game. As I think about it, I might have ideas for combat tactics that I need to look up. Or, I might have a question on what skills will be relevant. I might contemplate an interesting way to build out an NPC. Not necessarily the most efficient, but the most interesting, For me, I end up thinking about this stuff a lot. I might think about while driving to and from work, at lunch, at home while posting on EN World (even while writing this post I have tried to think of what I do to prep, and a few ideas have come up), whenever the throughts hit me basically. Sometimes it is a rough week at work and I am not as prepared on game night as I would like to be. Sometimes, I am so jazzed up that I don't need to reference notes or anything. Usually, it is somewhere in between. Now, I am not suggesting that you need to be as freaky as I am about it. But, if DM'ing is something you enjoy, you might find yourself spending more of your free time thinking about abstract game stuff.
Dealing with rules issues & player conflict is part of the not-as-fun aspects pf being a DM. So, my advice on that is simple. Focus on having fun and communicate. Most problems can be solved by calm, rational communication. Don't be afraid to toss out rules, or make them up if you don't know them, in the interest of fun. However, you need to remember that the spotlight should be on the PC's. Do not ever get so attached to an NPC that you are afraid to let them die. Now, on to your question on how to mentally prepare to DM. That is an interesting question that I have never thought of in those terms before. For me, it is mostly anticipation. I try to come up with cool NPC's, cool items, cool story devices, cool scenes, cool what have you. Something that I will enjoy playing with and can look forward to. As I go through the week, I think about how I will run that through the game. As I think about it, I might have ideas for combat tactics that I need to look up. Or, I might have a question on what skills will be relevant. I might contemplate an interesting way to build out an NPC. Not necessarily the most efficient, but the most interesting, For me, I end up thinking about this stuff a lot. I might think about while driving to and from work, at lunch, at home while posting on EN World (even while writing this post I have tried to think of what I do to prep, and a few ideas have come up), whenever the throughts hit me basically. Sometimes it is a rough week at work and I am not as prepared on game night as I would like to be. Sometimes, I am so jazzed up that I don't need to reference notes or anything. Usually, it is somewhere in between. Now, I am not suggesting that you need to be as freaky as I am about it.
But, if DM'ing is something you enjoy, you might find yourself spending more of your free time thinking about abstract game stuff.
Go over the material, just read over it and get an idea of what is going to happen in the session.
Set aside a few momment to discuss your views and rules of the table, your table. Be it food, be it breaks, be it talking, how do you roll init, conflicts, what your players are looking for.
House rules - if you have them share them, my soapbox is defining good and evil in the game, if you have one build a soapbox.
As Diaglo said; be more descriptive - build a index card listing words or phases to describe things your players will see and do.
Talk after the game - discuss the game with your player, what they liked, disliked, ways to improve the game. It is much their game as yours.
Have fun - don't get wrapped up in the rules, or worry about screwing up, just have fun.
Set aside a few momment to discuss your views and rules of the table, your table. Be it food, be it breaks, be it talking, how do you roll init, conflicts, what your players are looking for.
House rules - if you have them share them, my soapbox is defining good and evil in the game, if you have one build a soapbox.
As Diaglo said; be more descriptive - build a index card listing words or phases to describe things your players will see and do.
Talk after the game - discuss the game with your player, what they liked, disliked, ways to improve the game. It is much their game as yours.
Have fun - don't get wrapped up in the rules, or worry about screwing up, just have fun.
John Q. Mayhem
Explorer
Could someone post a link to that big DMing advice thread with all the links? Could be helpful. And dread, be happy that you didn't have to start DMing right when you started playing I still haven't had a chance to play 
I still haven't had a chance to play 
shilsen
Adventurer
John Q. Mayhem said:
Good idea. Here it is:
http://enworld.cyberstreet.com/showthread.php?threadid=47525
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