D&D General In this day and age, people still laugh when you invite them to play D&D.

[Ulorian - Agent of Chaos]

This is accurate, but @DarkCrisis did say they invited these people to play at their FLGS, so probably not a factor here.

Yup, missed that. @DarkCrisis , adjust advice accordingly...

 

[AlViking]

I missed that it was at the FLGS as we. Then my suggestion would be - don't invite them as much as tell them when and where. Let them know they can just stop by to check it out. No pressure, let them know just being an observer for a bit is fine.

But also accept that a lot of people are just being polite.

 

[jasper]

This is super true. I have something of a 3 strike rule I took from my Uncle.

If you express interest, I'll offer 3 times, you find a way to decline or excuse yourself that's fine by me, but I am not chasing after anyone due to their own hang ups.

Your uncle got that from me. Thief. Rogue, collector of unauthorized ideas. I started the 3 strikes way back in the early 90s when I got tired of people MENTIONING Interest and never showing up. It is a rare treat then and now when they do show up.
As with ANY hobby, Time and place determines interest. And small talk DOES NOT mean interest.

 

[el-remmen]

It is strange that pretending to have interest in what someone else is talking about can be simultaneously polite and impolite, but it is true.

 

[Piperken]

It's interesting to hear this, esp. in light of points Charlaquin mentions.

There's other factors involved ofc with inviting into/accepting a place at an at-table game, like:

• Table fullness.
• Significant age difference. While I'm aware a lot of DMs/players here have mentioned their age diverse tables that are very welcoming, some younger ppls understandably do avoid tables if there's > than 20+ year age difference, unless it's a specific case (a con one-shot, an after school club, immediate family, etc.)
• How well new on-boarded player will mesh with other players at the table, and w/ schedule.

 

[Seramus]

“Folks in their early to mid 40s” are older millennials. The youngest of gen X are in their late 40s now, and “people in their 20s” are mostly Gen Z. The youngest millennials are still clinging to their late 20s, but that’s not going to hold true for much longer.

When you're on the fringes like mid 40s, I find it usually comes down to how you were raised. Attentive and caring parents who might be overbearing but still technically engaged? Millennial. Aloof and absent parents who don't know where you are, and leave the key on the latch - be home before dark? Gen X.

 

[MNblockhead]

Are you saying nowadays that younger people would find it strange for older people to be playing TTRPGs or back then? You said, "Generation X and older will tend to hold more negative connotations about TTRPGs than younger generation, in my experience.", I was just saying that when I was in high school and college, I never had that experience, and I still don't.

I mean today. While D&D experience its first boom in 80s, and many kids played it at the time, the majority gave it up as they became adults. Among those who did play and gave it up who are in their 40s and above today, many find it strange when people their age are still playing it. Further, even though there were many who played it in the 80s, it was still a minority, as was a lot of "geek" culture, and so there is a large percentage of older generations that don't have much experience with it and feel it is odd for adults to be engaged with these hobbies.

People in their 20s today, are far less likely to find it weird. "Geek" culture (TTRPGs, comic IPs, sci fi, anime, video games, etc.) have gotten mainstream to the point that even those who are not into it, gave grown up with it being ubiquitous and almost certainly have a lot of peers who are into it. This is, of course, all anecdotal. If you have never run into older adults finding your hobbies a little odd for someone your age, I'm truly glad for you. But that hasn't been my experience.

 

[MNblockhead]

“Folks in their early to mid 40s” are older millennials. The youngest of gen X are in their late 40s now, and “people in their 20s” are mostly Gen Z. The youngest millennials are still clinging to their late 20s, but that’s not going to hold true for much longer.

Yeah, that was how I thought about it, but before making my post I looked it up. "In the U.S., the Pew Research Center, a nonpartisan think tank, delineates a Generation X period of 1965–1980 which has gradually gained acceptance in academic circles." and "Writing for Pew's Trend magazine in 2018, psychologist Jean Twenge observed that the "birth year boundaries of Gen X are debated but settle somewhere around 1965–1980".[1] According to this definition, as of 2025 the oldest members of Generation X are 60 and the youngest are 44." Generation X - Wikipedia

45 seems young to be considered Generation X to me, but that's what the "experts" say. I personally find the concept of generational cut-offs to be somewhat suspect. They may be useful shorthand for broad generational trends but are prone to over generalization. I just note that the younger you go the more acceptance of TTRPGs and other "geeky" activities and interests you find. But it can vary greatly based on professional field and other factors.

As an aside, I've often wondered about this in the context of computer science. I'm old enough to remember when being interested in computers was considered nerdy and reason enough to get picked on. A very high percentage of people I know who went into that field in the 80s and early 90s were into TTRPGs, comics, sci fi, etc. One could easily stereotype people in that field as being nerds in general. Over the decades that seems to have greatly changed. You really can't assume that a software designer or computer engineer today is going to be into geeky hobbies, where I submit it was a much safer assumption in the 80s and 90s.

Anyway, I do think there’s a real generational difference here. Millennials and gen Z folks are much more loath to relinquish our childhoods than previous generations were. I mean, this is the cohort that, upon being thrust into the workforce, invented the euphemism “adulting” to refer to the associated social and fiscal responsibilities that transition entailed, because we neither felt adequately prepared for them, nor had any desire for them. There are a lot of complex socioeconomic reasons for this, but I digress. Point is, yeah, despite now being in our 30s to 40s, we have absolutely no shame in being invited to play children’s games, and indeed many would be delighted to still be thought of as “cool enough” to invite despite our age.

That's an interesting observation. Of course observations of "extended adolescence" have been made since the 80s. The trends of pushing adult milestones back, such as leaving home, financial independence, marriage, and having children are hard to deny. But I've always felt that it was a bit of stretch to apply that to hobbies. Most adults of all generations have continued to engage in play and fandoms built in childhood: sports, model railroading and other model building, board games, puzzle solving, etc. And many have been criticized for it and the hobbies had to grow to be accepted. Sociologist Brian Sutton-Smith wrote about the "ambiguity of play," noting how cultures often marginalize adult play unless it’s productive, family-oriented (games with kids), or disguised as work. And I've noted a trend that parents who never played TTRPGs and are not interested in any traditional "geek" culture, were eager for their kids to join D&D games (often organized by a parent who was in the hobby), because they saw value in their kids socializing and being involved in a hobby that involves group teamwork, reading, and imagination. I feel the modern childhood of too much screen time, increased isolation, etc. have made TTRPGs seem valuable. When I go into the hobby most of us played in the face of adult ambivalence or opposition. Few of us were encourage to play TTRPGs. When your parents and other adults accept, value, and encourage your interests it can make it easier to take them into adulthood.

 

[TiQuinn]

I’ve noticed a difference in overall acceptance, not necessarily willingness to want to participate, i.e. I’m don’t hear much overall mocking of how I like to spend my free time. Now that could also be a function of age too. Kids and young adults can just be meaner than adults, but there were always scoffers of every age who made it so I just never talked about it. Now, I can least SAY the name of the game without getting crap.

 

[Piperken]

...I just note that the younger you go the more acceptance of TTRPGs and other "geeky" activities and interests you find. But it can vary greatly based on professional field and other factors...

I recall ~10-20 years back there was a rebirth of everything old is new again, that was tied by a number of writers at the time to generation. There was a lot of rediscovery by younger ppls in particular fashion styles, retrowave & synthwave in music, ppl learning again that they liked vinyl records, reading actual books, new video games being done in 8/16-bit format, etc.

I feel some of the interest in TTRPGs we see now came along with this, though maybe less prominently.