Cheese, Giant Bugs, and “Did That Hill Just Blink?”
Meanwhile, Further to the North
Spurred on by Siabrey’s insistent, sometimes forceful urgings, the party grabbed the Steward (who was rather unwilling until he saw Siabrey’s furious face... and once again was cowed) and trudged northward, leaving their horses behind at the safety of the manor.
The Steward explained that once they got deep enough into the swamp, there would be a small dock with a skiff on two the party could go into... and from there he could guide them through the waters to the safe keep.
There’s what? Six of us? I hope this ‘skiff’ is big enough... Tess worried. She knew little of boating from personal experience, but she knew ‘skiff usually meant something very small.
The Steward must have read the look of worry on her face, and smiled gently, “Don’t worry... the skiffs can seat 12. They were designed to evacuate the Lord, Lady, and important staff to the safe keep. There should be one skiff left... for messengers to tell them its okay to come out.”
“And in all seriousness,” Shaun added, “Grumki, you should sit in the middle of the boat... keep the weight even so it doesn’t tip.” The half orc looked at the rogue, and realized there was no humor intended by Shaun’s serious face.
“Ah... well... the strength of Kord does require balance while in boats,” the orc muttered, glancing up at the sky. Brilliant billows of red began to spread their folds across the sky, as dawn slowly enveloped the world...
“Grumki,” Siabrey groaned, straining at the oar she manned, “could you
please row one handed?” The half orc looked at her funny, and she rolled her eyes. “If you don’t, we’ll keep going in circles!”
“Hmmm,” Grumki muttered, “Well... I suppose the strength of Kord could be better demonstrated with one handed rowing,” he beamed a fearsome smile. Tess and Shaun couldn’t help but laugh, as the skiff’s prow finally came back onto the heading the Steward pointed towards.
“How much longer?” Shaun asked, swatting at the gnats that already were swarming around the skiff and the warm, breathing bodies therein. They’d already spent three hours in the skiff... the sun wasn’t fully overhead yet and heat was beginning to burn down on them. Coupled with the onerous humidity of the swamp they had needed to slug through the even reach the “pier” (a pier that was already undered an inch of water, the swamp was so deep) that held their skiff.
“Perhaps another five hours!” the Steward called back. “We shall reach the keep perhaps two hours after noon!” He too swiped at the insects dashing around his body, eagerly trying to land and claim the salt of his sweat as their own.
“Grr,” Tess groaned, “enough is enough!” She balanced herself carefully, and rose to standing in the middle of the boat.
“What the heck are you doing? Sit down before you fall!” Siabrey chided.
I couldn’t leave you in the swamp, and we’d lose time picking you up... act like you have some sense, please?
“I’m making us a screen to keep these bugs out!” Tess said slowly, as one would speak to a small child. Siabrey rolled her eyes at her friend. Tess was indeed like a big sister... which including annoying big sister moments.
(DM’s Note: Out of character, the following that happened was hiliarious. Tess’ player wanted to use
minor creation to make mosquito netting, until I reminded her that no such thing existed. So she thought a moment, and came up with the following...)
“A screen? You mean like a net?” Shaun asked. “The holes are far too big, a gnat is, gah!” he swatted again, “...is easily going to fit through one of those!”
“No, not a net, you silly twit!” Tess grinned, “I’m making cheese cloth!”
“Um... pardon my question, but... how will cheese cloth help us get rid of bugs... there isn’t any cheese to be squeezed...” Siabrey ventured as Tess hummed some tunes and began pulling more and more cheese cloth seemingly out of thin air.
“Maybe she’s going to wrap it around her face, like a gauze?” Iranami offered.
“I’d think you’d suffocate doing that,” Shaun countered, as everyone watched Tess with interest.
Once she'd created a great mass of the cloth, she hummed some more, creating several pieces of wood. After the creation of some nails and a hammer, she nailed the wood to the back of the skiff, forming a small, square structure, with cheesecloth stretched all around it.
“There!” she smiled, and strode inside to sit as a queen, floating down her own putrid Nile.
“Tess... you look ridiculous,” Shaun laughed, still swiping at bugs. Tess grinned back.
“I may look funny, but am I swiping at gnats?” she asked, and Shaun’s mockings suddenly ceased. The party began taking turns resting inside the small cheesecloth enclosure, with Grumki and Siabrey both saying they could tough out the gnats and keep on rowing without stop.
After one has suffered under enough ceaseless buzzing from gnats, flies and mosquitos, the noise tends to merge into one ceaseless, annoying roar.. a roar that almost covered up the noise of
very loud,
very large buzzing up ahead.
Siarbey and Shaun were the first to notice the noise, and it was Shaun’s sharp eyes that spotted a large swarm of something in the distance, closing towards the party.
“Um... hey! Tess? Iranami? Someone? What the hell are those?” he pointed towards the seething mass of flying bodies, which seemed to grow closer and closer, their buzz louder and louder.
“Those are the biggest frickin’ mosquitos I’ve ever seen,” Iranami said slowly as the buzz grew into a rumble.
Swarm... loud... very large... hmm... what was that song of my teacher? Tess wondered.
In the darkness of swamp
Tromp tromp tromp
Our heroes did find the Bird
And as they rode out
Clomp clomp clomp
They did fall prey to the...
“Stirge!” Tess said suddenly, her eyes going wide.
“What? What’s a birge?” Shaun asked, mishearing her.
“No! Stirges! Get inside the cheesecloth! Now!” Tess grabbed Grumki and amazingly began to tow him back to the cheesecloth hut at the rear of the skiff.
“The strength of Kord does not require yanking Grumki’s shoulder! Grumki can move himself!” the half orc rumbled, shrugging off Tess’ hand and clambering to the back, with Siabrey, Tess and Shaun close behind.
Once inside, Tess hurriedly hummed hte same tune she’d sang before, causing more cheesecloth to appear in her hands. With this, she hurriedly filled up the remaining cracks in their protective screen.
“Stay away from the screen... I know its tight, but they won’t be able to get through!” she called.
I hope.. Maybe they’ll just fly overhead... and leave us alone after they realize they can’t get to us...
The party cowered together in the back of the boat, causing it to list to the rear. As they clustered among each other, the noise of the stirges turned into a roar... tens of bat-sized wings beating, buzzing rumbling. As the party looked on in horror, massive needlepoints lanced through the cheesecloth, and began wiggling about, desperately trying to plunge their bloodsucking tendrils into someone before withdrawing.
All looked on in fear, not noticing the small grin that was forming on Tess’ lips. The roar of the stirges themselves covered up her humming... but everyone noticed when suddenly a large wheel of cheese appeared on her lap.
“Tess!” Siabrey screeched, “What the hell are you doing!? This isn’t time for brunch or a midday snack!” The fighter cautiously waved her sword near where the stirges tried to pierce through... wanting to cut off their needle-like proboscises, while not wanting to cut the cheesecloth.
Tess calmly cut the cheese into square segments, and calmly took one, and slid towards the cheesecloth. As everyone else looked on in confusion, she waited until another needle slammed through the cheesecloth, and she promptly rammed the cheese into it, causing the wiggling needle to become still. From that location, there was a massive, seemingly panicky increase in buzzing.
Shaun and Siabrey’s minds were hte first to catch on to the implications, and they eagerly grabbed cheese as well. Soon, the entire group emulated Tess, and proboscises were soon embedded in numerous cheese squares... and fewer and fewer needlepoints slammed through the cheesecloth.
At first, the noise of buzzing grew enormous, as dozens of stirges tried in vain to pull themselves free... a process that, as the party waited for an hour, exhausted the vicious creatures. When the party emerged, they found dozens of stirges imprisoned to the cheesecloth... alive, but too tired to do anything.
Siabrey, Grumki, and Shaun proceeded to have fun chopping apart the nasty creatures, and quickly the party was on its way yet again, Tess proudly sitting under her cheesecloth tent, and no one teasing her about it.
(DM’s Note: If I remember correctly, they got extra XP for that one... very very creative
)
It was nearly four stirgeless hours later when the party rounded a bend in the large bayou like area they were sailing through, when the Steward pointed ahead. Through the gloom of the towering darkness of overhanging trees, the party spotted the light of a clearing ahead... and in that light, grey.
“There it is!” the Steward said excitedly. “It is late in the day... therefore, we should likely spend the night here, before heading back!” As the party drew nearer, they saw indeed the grey was the stone wall of a massive keep, built onto what looked to be an island of stone in the middle of the swamp.
Later, Shaun would say at that moment, when they were about 100 feet from the edge of the stone rock the keep was set on, he saw a woman fleetingly appear in one of the windows along the wall. He would say that her face was filled with utter panic, just as the party heard a massive, bellowing roar.
From behind the 25 foot tall wall, a hump was visible.. sickly green-grey, moving about, as enormous crashes and thuds merged with bellowing roars and screams. It was easily apparent the keep was under assault by
something... something huge... massive, and angry.
Without a word, Siabrey and Shaun had already drawn bows, and arrows flew over the battlements, into the grey-green mound. Shaun then lost sight of the woman, he was so focused on whatever was behind the wall, and thus did not notice her doom when the beast turned, and the wall facing the party bulged outward, before collapsing into rubble as an enormous monster thundered out towards new prey... the party.
It was easily 30 feet tall, its body speckled green and grey. Its bellow was a blazing yellow, sickingly different than its skin. Two eyestalks, easily four feet long, came out of its head, each holding a single, grey orb in its clasp. A massive, ten foot long rose tongue flecked out of its lips, and while it walked on two ponderous toad-legs, it held no arms... merely four long tentacles.
Immediately more arrows were nocked, and creature seemed downright easy to hit because of its massive size... but despite the pincushion of arrows that rapidly filled it, it still came onward, sinking down into the water as it drew near. Grumki and Iranami both called upon the heavens, and two columns of fire sliced down, slamming the creature full bore... but still it came. Once it drew within 50 feet, Tess let loose a horrific shriek, but her sonic darts seemed to merely annoy it, as it drew right next to the boat.
Its tentacles first lashed out, slamming into Tess, Grumki, and Siabrey with devastating force, knocking them around the boat and nearly knocking Grumki into the water. As the other party members reeled from its stinging assaults, the creature loomed over the boat, and bit Shaun viciously, yanking him skyward, and swallowing him into its maw.
Grumki saw the this happen as he straightened himself out, and promptly he drew his favorite weapon, and while calling on Kord to blessed his strike, swung the weapon with all the fierceness his massive frame could muster into the creature’s head.
The half orc was rewarded with a loud series of sickening cracks, crunches and pops, as seemingly every bone in the left side of the creature’s skull was shattered and broken, and its head immediately lolled to the side in instant death, blood trickling out of its mangled ears and eyes.
As the creature sank towards the bottom of the swamp, the party noticed Shaun’s head sticking out of its maw, as he desperately tried to pull himself free. Hands launched out, and with the help of Siabrey and Grumki, Shaun was pulled from the sinking beast just before its form disappeared beneath the muddy waters.
(DM’s Note: That... was a froghemoth, out of the Creature Catalogues
)
