101 Wierd Wand Effects
1) A huge tongue sticks out of the end of the wand and gives the target a raspberry. Treat the resulting slobber like a grease spell
2) The wand backfires, releasing a noxious cloud of green gas. Everyone in 10' must make a DC 12 Fort save or be nauseated 1d4 rounds.
3) The wand begins to emit a hum, which grows louder and louder over the next 1d4+1 rounds. At the end of that time, it emits a lightning bolt that deals 1d6+1 damage per round it hummed.
4) The wand grows hot to the touch. If the wielder can make a successful DC 12 Fort save, it unleashes a 2d6+2 mini-fireball (10' area of effect). Otherwise the wand is dropped and the charge fizzles away.
5) Bubbles burst from the tip until the character's next turn, providing cover for the wielder
6) Black, bat-like shapes fly from the wand at the target. Target must make a successful DC 12 Will save or be distracted (-2 to hit) for 1d4+1 rounds
7) The tip of the wand bulges and oozes a green sap-like substance. A moment later, a blob of goop shoots forth at the target. Treat it like a tanglefoot bag
8) The wand sprouts a handful of leaves, which suddenly wilt and die. They are then hurled at the target with the effects of a Gust of Wind.
9) The wand narrows and extends, enwrapping the target. Treat this as a grapple attempt with a Strength of 13 that does not provoke an attack of opportunity. The wand can maintain the grapple until the target or another individual can break the grapple or deal 10 hp of damage to the wand (reducing it to its original size)
10) Sparks fly out of the end of the wand. Anyone approaching the wielder must make a DC 12 Reflex save or take 1d2 fire damage and must step back immediately 5'. The sparks last until the wielder shakes the wand vigorously, or 1d4+1 rounds pass.
11) The wand elongates into a +1 quarterstaff for 1 minute
12) The wand teleports the character 30' in the direction they were pointing unless the wielder makes a successful DC 12 Will save.
13) A strange liquid begins flowing out of the tip of the wand. If collected, it acts like a random minor potion. The liquid evaporates and is lost after 1d4+1 rounds if it is not drunk
14) The tip of the wand glows brightly. If touched to a target, it heals 1d8+1 hit points, as per Cure Light Wounds
15) The wand shouts "Expend one additional charge for desired effect". If the wielder does so, they may use the wand to cast one 1st level Arcane spell of their choice (Caster Level 1, spell DC 12)
16) The wand goes limp. If the caster expends a move action to stroke the wand, it straightens and shoots a Magic Missile at the target.
17) The wand freezes to the caster's hand, deal 1 point of cold damage. It then expels a 30' cone of ice and snow that deals 1d6+1 damage.
18) The wand makes a sound as if a weapon cocking. It then begins to expel Magic Missiles in random directions (roll d8) for as long as the wielder can hold on. The first Missile requires a DC 10 Strength check, each additional check is at +2 DC.
19) An eerie howl echoes from the wand. Then....silence. 1d4+1 rounds later, a Fiendish Hawk dives from the sky attacking the wand's original target. The Hawk remains for 2 rounds before vanishing.
20) Manacles appear in the air, the clasps champing like vicious jaws. The manacles chase the target, capturing it if it fails a DC 12 Reflex save. If the manacles hit the target, they remain until removed, otherwise they vanish after their initial attack.
21) The wand sizzles, then...nothing. The next time the target is adjacent to any of its allies, it must make a DC 12 Will save or it makes an immediate melee attack against that enemy.
22) The wand grunts loudly, then backfires, knocking the wielder backward 20' feet if they fail a DC 12 Fortitude save.
23) The wand shoots from the wielder's hand, trying to pierce the target's heart. The wielder makes a ranged attack. On a hit, the target takes 2d8 damage, half on a DC 12 Fortitude save. Either way, the wielder now needs to retrieve the wand...
24) The wand turns invisible, and the caster does as well a moment later. The invisibility only lasts for 1d4+1 rounds, however. Or until the caster makes another attack.
25) The wand snaps downward and digs into the ground. Huge roots shoot outward from the wand, acting like an Entangle spell for 2 minutes. The wand can't be pulled out of the ground without ending the spell.
26) The wand fires an enormous spitball at the target as a ranged touch attack, dealing 1d6+1 damage and sticking to the target's forehead. The wand can fire up to three such spitballs (one per round), before stopping, panting and out of breath.
27) The wand yells "Ten-Hut" at the target, who must make a DC 12 Will save or spend the round standing as straight as a rod, their arms at their side, their feet together and chin pointed to the stars.
28) The wand grows arms and a face and goes "Booga-booga" at the target, who must make a DC 12 Will save or go white-faced and be shaken for 1d4+1 rounds
29) A bucket of paint and a brush spits out of the wand's tip, landing next to the wielder. Growing arms (and legs), the wand pulls itself free, and upon landing on the ground grabs the bucket of paint and brush and rushes at the target fails a DC 12 Reflex save, they are painted to resemble a skeleton (or zombie). Until the target takes a full-round action to wipe away the paint, they can be turned as if they were an undead creature.
30) The wand grows a hand and stretches toward the target. As a ranged touch attack, it slaps the target for 1d4+1 damage.
31) The wand grows a hand and slaps the wielder. "Do something useful!" it snaps. The wielder is treated as being a Bless spell cast by a 2nd level cleric.
32) The wand begins puking, complete with gagging sound effects. Anyone within 30' must make a DC 12 Fortitude save or be sickened for 1d4+1 rounds.
33) Flowing colors and soothing music eminate from the wand, acting like a Hypnotism spell
34) The wand turns black and the wielder feels a sharp pain in his chest. A moment later, he collapses to the ground, dead. In actuality, the death is a Silent Image and the wielder has been turned Invisible. Sadly, this only lasts for one round.
35) The wand lets out a low sigh, then spits out a small red ball that rolls on the ground about 5' toward the target. The next round, the ball begins to shimmy and shake, then explodes into flame, acting like a flaming sphere that lasts 1d4+1 round before burning itself out.
36) The wand shoots the wielder's arms skyward and something flashes into the sky. The next round, the target is hit by a lightning bolt for 1d+1 damage, half damage on a successful DC 12 Reflex save.
37) The wand pulls the wielder in the direction opposite the target and causes the wielder to run in that direction (5x movement, even if already moved) if a DC 12 Will save fails.
38) The wand transforms into a +1 Long Sword for 1 minute
39) The wand huffs and puffs as a huge bubble expands out of the tip. Within a few moments, the bubble is large enough to enclose a man. The wielder can direct the bubble to anyone within 30', which it envelopes the individual and provides protection as per Mage Armor.
40) The wand begins coughing and expelling black smoke. The smoke fills a 20' cube for 1 minute. Treat it as an Obscuring Mist, but those in the smoke constant cough and hack.
41) The wand grows arms, crosses them and utters "Uh-uh. No way. Not today." If the wielder can appease it with a DC 12 Charisma check, the wielder may roll again twice and choose which result to use.
42) The wand begins to snore. Those within 30' of the wand who hear it must make a DC 12 Will save or become drowsy. A second failure causes the individual to fall asleep. If either save is made, no additional save is required. The wand snores for 1d4+1 rounds.
43) Suddenly, everything goes silent. The wand becomes the center of effect of a Silence spell.
44) The target is suddenly drenched by 2 gallons of water that appear from midair above them.
45) A pig-like nose appears on the wand and snuffles. If the target fails a DC 12 Will save, it can only speak in Pig Latin until it undergoes a Remove Curse.
46) Flower petals stream from the wand, engulfing the target. If the target fails a DC 12 Fortitude save, it is transformed into the gender opposite of the wielder. If a subsequent DC 12 Will save is failed, it is also attracted to the wielder.
47) The wand yells "Incoming!". All individuals in a path 5' wide and 30' long who fail a DC 12 Reflex save are struck by a man-sized high-speed flying duck for 1d6+1 damage and knocked prone. The duck flies away after the attack
48) A green, thorny hedge grows in front of the wielder - 10' high and 10' wide. The hedge is AC 10 and 10 hit points. It provides superior cover to those behind it.
49) The sky turns black and begins to swirl counterclockwise above the wielder's head. The next round, it begins to rain, requiring those moving faster than 1/2 their movement rate to make Balance DC 12 checks to remain standing . The round after that, thunder rolls through the area and everyone within 30' of the wielder must make Fortitude DC 12 saves or be a -2 to hit and AC for the round. The next round, frogs begin to rain from the sky and everyone within 30' of the wielder must make DC 12 Will saves or be distracted. Finally, on the fourth round a bolt of lightning streaks down, dealing 1d8+1 damage to the original target of the wand, half damage for a successful DC 12 Reflex save. The storm then vanishes, though the frogs and rain remain - though they are harmless from this point onward.
50) Cruel thorns grow into the wielder's hand. No charges are lost and the wand regains a charge from the blood it draws
51) The wand makes munching and slurping sounds, and begins spitting out bones for the next 1d4+1 rounds. At the end of this time, it spits out a human skull and the resulting skeleton cobbles itself together and faithfully follows the wielder for a day or until it is slain.
52) The wand begins to shake and shimmy, then begins to buck like a wild bronco. If the wielder can hold onto it with a successful DC 12 Reflex save, the vibrations pass through to the ground, causing everyone in 20 feet to make DC 12 Reflex saves or be thrown violently to the ground for 1d4+1 damage. If the wielder fails to hold on, the wand falls to the ground and must be picked back up after it stops twitching 1 round later.
53) The wand begins crying, gushing tears and boo-hooing loudly. The target must make a DC 12 Will save or spend the next 1d4+1 rounds attempting to console the wand and its wielder.
54) The wand nearly snaps in two, the tip dangling by a slim filament. A feminine voice utters in a calm, soothing voice "Wand has been broken. You have 30 seconds to reach minimum safe distance." Sure enough, after 5 rounds, the wand explodes, dealing 5d6+5 damage to anyone within 30 feet (half on a successful DC 12 Reflex save). The wand loses 5 charges, but afterward appears whole.
55) The wand makes a sound like a baby's rattle. If the wielder continues to shake it as a move action, it suddenly hisses and a fiendish viper slips out and lunges toward the target. The viper remains for 2 rounds or until slain.
56) 1d3 x 100 gp spray out of the tip of the wand, assaulting the target as a ranged touch attack that deals 1d6+1 damage. Sadly, the next round the gold fades away to nothing.
57) A small flag with the word "Bang" drops out of the end of the barrel. If the target cannot resist a DC 12 Will save, it starts snickering and then a loud "Bang" noise goes off in it's body, causing its nose to bleed and dealing 1d6+1 damage
58) Three dwarf midgets in clown suits pull themselves free of the wand's tip and acrobatically tumble to surround the target, pummeling him with insults and selzer water. The target is stunned until it succeeds a DC 12 Will save or another individual causes the target harm.
59) A pink elephant charges from the bulging tip of the wand. Make a touch attack against the target. On a hit, the pink elephant explodes into thousand of champagne bubbles and the target burns as if hit with alchemist's fire.
60) A heroic theme begins to play from the wand. If the wielder makes a successful DC 12 Perform check, all allies within 30' act as if under a Bless spell.
61) The wielder is transformed into a 3-year-old child. This acts as a Sanctuary spell, though the wielder does not transform back until after subjected to a Remove Curse.
62) The wielder and the target transpose positions.
63) The wand pulls itself downward into the ground, and then sprouts into a huge 30' tall oak tree that desires to talk to the wielder about the weather and crops for the next 1d4+1 rounds. Anyone attempting to interfere (or if the wielder attempts to escape the conversation) the tree makes a melee attack against that individual (Att +5, Dam: 1d6+3). The tree can take 30 hit points before it is felled and transforms back into the wand.
64) The wielder (and all equipment) melts into butter, gaining a movement rate of 10 feet, but the ability to slip through cracks up to 1/4" wide or larger. The buttery shape lasts for 1 minute.
65) A great roaring sound, like that of the ocean, seems to come from all directions. The ground then begins to melt away, becoming water in a 30' radius around the wielder. Those who fail a DC 12 Reflex save aren't fast enough to get to solid in time and are dumped into the 30' deep water. The ground returns to normal 1d4+1 rounds later - and may entrap those still caught in or under the water.
66) A great droning sounds like bees gets louder and louder for the next 1d4+1 rounds. At the end of that time, if the wand is not used again, a locust swarm arrives in the target's square. It ravenously attacks the closest living target and remains until destroyed. It is NOT under the wand wielder's control.
67) The wand begins to shimmy and shake. If the wielder can hold onto it with a successful DC 12 Reflex save, it become a magnificent black mare in chain barding. It remains in this shape for 1 day or until the reigns are grasped and it is commanded to expend another charge.
68) The wand yanks itself free of the wielder and begins to twirl in the air. It acts like a shield spell cast at 2nd level.
69) Feathers spew from the wand, engulfing the target. If the target fails a DC 12 Reflex save, it is lifted up 5' off the ground, suffers a -2 penalty to AC and cannot move from its current position for 1d4+1 rounds.
70) Black, boiling tar drips from the wand for the next 1d4+1 rounds. If slung on a target as a ranged touch attack (10' range) it deals 1d4+1 fire damage and entangles the target like a tanglefoot bag.
71) Thousands of colorful butterflies erupt from the wand, acting like a Color Spray
72) A powerful beam of light erupts from the end of the wand, giving off an electric hum as the target finds themselves encased in black plate mail (if they fail a DC 12 Fortitude save). The wand can be wielded as a long sword, dealing 2d6 fire damage on a hit (the wand's target is likewise armed). This effect lasts for 1 minute.
73) Rings of green fire expand from the tip of the wand. Each ring can be expelled outwards as a 60' ranged attack to deal 1d4+1 damage, or allowed to held for a round and grow to deal and deal a +1d4 damage (up to 5d4 damage). If a ring is allowed to grow to deal 6d4+1 damage, it explodes, dealing that to the wielder (half on a successful DC 12 Reflex save). The rings expand for 1d6+1 rounds
74) A red-feathered cockatrice erupts from the tip, crowing loudly. It turns to fix its wicked gaze on the wielder. If the wielder makes a successful DC 12 Intimidate check, the cockatrice scuttles off to attack the target of the wand. If the wielder fails, the cockatrice attacks the wielder. The cockatrice makes one attack, then vanishes in a putrid puff of smoke.
75) The wand peels back like a banana, accompanied by a loud bang and puff of black smoke. Make a ranged touch attack against the target to deal 2d6+1 damage. It takes the wand 1d4+1 rounds to mend itself afterward.
76) The wand wiggles and writhes in the wielder's hand. A moment later, a knight in gleaming plate mail erupts from the tip, brandishing a 2-handed sword. With a murderous cry, it rushes the target of the wand, making a single attack (Att +5, Dam 2d6+5). After it's attack, the armor explodes, spewing party confetti everywhere.
77) The wand elongates and wraps around the wielder, transforming into a huge constrictor snake. The wielder cannot move for 1d4+1 rounds, but anyone coming within 10' is attacked by the constrictor snake. Half of any damage done to the wand wielder is instead absorbed by the constrictor snake.
78) Luminous Honey begins to drip from the wand for the next 1d4+1 rounds. If slung onto an enemy as a ranged touch attack (10' range), the next round a black bear erupts from the ground and attacks the target. After making it's attack, the black bear turns into a swarm of sprites dressed liked bees, who curse the wand wielder as they fly away.
79) A gnome dressed in a green business suit and green bowler hat manifests and leaps from the tip of the wand, tumbling to the ground. After introducing himself with an impossibly long name, he taunts all nearby to catch him. The first individual to successfully grapple him finds he transforms into a 100 gp hunk of gold. Sadly, the gold turns to lead a day later.
80) The wand drags free of its wielder and skyward, shooting flames and spewing a noxious cloud of brimstone. A round later, a demonic form hurls to the ground as if tossed down by a comet. With a roar, it lunges at the wand's target. Make a touch attack for the demon. If it succeeds, the target makes a DC 12 Will save or falls to the ground comatose (if the target is harmed or attacked, it instantly awakens). After the attack, hit or miss, the demon fades to smoke and the wand floats back down to the wielder.
81) Sizzling fire pours to the ground in front of the wielder and forms a 5' puddle of fiery liquid. Every round, hot, living embers jump out of the pool and scurry up to 30' towards a random target. Make a touch attack. On a hit, the target takes 1d4+1 fire damage. The pool remains for 1d4+1 rounds.
82) The wand begins to spin the wielder in a ever-faster circle. By round's end, the wielder looks like a mini-cyclone. If the wielder can make a successful DC 12 Balance check, he move in a direction of his choosing. Otherwise, he moves randomly and makes melee attack against all targets within 5' of him, dealing 1d4+1 damage on a hit. After 1d4+1 rounds, the whirling stops, and the character is nauseated and exhausted afterward for the same amount of time.
83) The wand opens a black void in the air before the wielder. Anyone daring to pass through the hole must make a DC 12 Knowledge (The Planes) check. Failure means the individual is randomly moved to a spot up to 30' distant. A success means the individual can move to a point of their choosing up to 60' feet away as a move action. The hole remains for 1d4+1 rounds.
84) The end of wand turns into a pair of gnashing jaws. The wielder can use the wand as a melee weapon that deals 1d8 damage on a hit. It remains this way for 1 minute or until another charge is expended.
85) Corn stalks suddenly shoot up from the ground in an area 30' about the caster. 1d4+1 rounds later, the corn begins popping into popcorn. Anyone in the cornfield gains concealment, but anyone remaining in the popping fields must make a DC 12 Will save or be distracted.
86) The wand turns into a giant roc and grabs the wand wielder unless a successful DC 12 Reflex save is made. The roc flies for 1 round before settling back down to the ground at the end of its move and returning to wand form.
87) The wand lets out a hissing sound like a deflating balloon. The wielder is shrunk as per the Reduce spell for 1 minute.
88) Sparks and miniature fireworks explode from the tip of the wand. If the target fails a DC 12 Reflex save, they are lit up as if by Faerie Fire.
89) The wand harumphs, then...nothing. 1d4+1 rounds later, the target is hit by the same number of Magic Missiles.
90) The wand jerks the wielder to face the nearest non-magical door. The door suddenly bulges then rips itself free of its hinges and walks away, never to be seen again.
91) A metal safe (3'X3'X3') unfolds from the wand, threatening to enclose the wielder if they fail a DC 12 Reflex save. The combination to the safe is 1-2-3 (consider to be a Good lock for picking). The safe has DR 10/- and 80 hit points.
92) A fiery comet streaks down from the sky, landing in front of the wielder. A burning angel unfurls from the smoking crater, holding up a blade of lightning and a shield of mithral. In a booming voice, it declares "This individual is under my protection!" For the next 1d4+1 rounds, or until an enemy can name a law the individual has broken, the angel grants the wielder a +5 bonus to AC (the angel does not attack).
93) Sand spills from the wand, piling into a sand castle in front of the wielder. If the wielder remains in place for 1d4+1 rounds, the castle is finished and a miniature army marches forth to do battle in the name of the wielder. Treat the miniature army as two Spider Swarms. They remain until destroyed or until 2 minutes pass.
94) A galloping nightmare riden by a headless horseman leaps from the tip of the wand. It races towards the target, cackling madly. The rider takes one swipe at the target as it races by (Att +5, Dam 2d6+1), and then disappears across a ghostly bridge in the distance, which seems to swallow the rider and itself up.
95) Hundreds of ghosts spill uncontrollably from the tip of the wand. Everyone within 30' must make a DC 12 Will save or be distracted for 1d4+1 rounds. Survivors will have horrible nightmares until they can rid themselves of the spirits with a Remove Curse.
96) The target must make a DC 12 Fortitude save or is turned so hideously ugly that anyone viewing him or her cannot stand to let the individual live. Even former allies must make a DC 12 Will save or seek to slay the individual.
97) Nothing seems happen. However, the next time the target makes an attack, it must make a DC 12 Will save or become the target of its own attack.
98) A brilliant burst of light explodes from the wand, dazzling all within 30' if they fail a DC 12 Reflex save.
99) Razor-sharp pine needles and exploding pine cones rain from the sky. Anyone within 20' of the target takes 2d4+2 piercing and fire damage (half with successful DC 12 Reflex save).
100) The wand seemingly implodes, teleporting the wielder and everyone within 20' of the wielder back to their native home. This uses 1 charge of the wand per individual transported.
101) Roll again twice, ignoring this result.
