Need vague threats for a monk

[KingDobbs]

The Tao of Beavis:

"Does not fire need the water? Does not the mountain need the storm? Does not your scrotum need kicking?" <scrotum kick>

 

[barsoomcore]

"I assume you wish to surrender. Very wise. For there are twelve of you and one of me. Therefore, you perceive, you are outnumbered."

 

[Angcuru]

"Confucious say: No use cannon to kill mosquito......BUT HE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT USING A SCYTHE TO DECAPITATE HALFLINGS! DIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

 

[blackshirt5]

BURN KNUCKLE!

Or, if you prefer to make it a bit worse, pull a Ted outta your hat.

BURN HEMMEROID!

 

[Angcuru]

FLAMING SHURIUKEN TO THE NUTS!

DEATH CABER!

SPINNING DOUBLE-BLADED SCOTTSMAN OF DEATH!

ACH!

 

[Oni]

Well if we believe anime, then saying such things as, "I no desire to fight with one such as you," and, "I do not wish to hurt you," in a calm assurred manner will almost invariably induce whoever you are faced with to take a swing at you.

 

[Angcuru]

"hey, howya doin?" *tear out heart* "not so good, i'd assume!"

 

[Voadam]

Your puny armor is no obstacle to a master of the Iron Crane!

I see you are not man enough to face me with honor!

Why don't you put down the oversized knife, you're so clumsy you're liable to cut your own arm off.

I've seen flumphs that were more dangerous than you!

 

[Voadam]

You are not worthy of my sword, and I need no weapon to defeat the likes of YOU!

 

[F5]

"There is shame in being too proud to back down from a fight you cannot win. Humility can be taught, and I am a thorough teacher..."

When the opponent tosses back "is that a threat?" have the monk respond "The enlightened have no need for threats. We merely state facts, and then follow through."