Okay, new challenge

[Greenfield]

Here's the new challenge, since we've beaten orbital laser platforms to death.

The King wants to water ski.

How do you make a water craft fast enough to allow this. It can be done at speeds as slow as 250 per round, but 400 to 500 is better.

 

[Thunderfoot]

Well, Mythbusters proved you can waterski with a team of scullers, so I would say a small water craft with a rear tiller and a magical sail with a permanent Gust of Wind spell cast upon it that fires when its unfurled.

 

[Greenfield]

Well, a 50 mph wind is near gale force, and will tear most canvas sails to shreds in very short order.

But that's a real world consideration, not a game rule issue, so I guess we have to chalk up a win on the first proposal.

Good one, you win.

And your prize is...

The duty to come up with the next "How would you..." challenge. Let's see what you can come up with.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Mythbusters proved you can waterski with a team of scullers

Given that, what about necroskullers?

Skeletons are basically as strong as humans, and have about 70% of the mass: the better power to weight ratio should result in a higher speed. And as undead, they don't tire.

 

[Dandu]

Well, a 50 mph wind is near gale force, and will tear most canvas sails to shreds in very short order.

Use a spell that doubles the hardness of the target object. It's from the SpC.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Make the sail out of Drider-silk.

Barring that, make the sail-frame and cast multiple Web spells upon it...possibly all made Permanent.

For extra cool, the sail could be made from a Wall of Force shaped within the frame (and optionally, made Permanent as well)- a massless, invisible sail!

 

[Theo R Cwithin]

I'm envisioning sails of mithril foil.

 

[Thunderfoot]

It wasn't natural I tells ya. A ship large as a house, black as the night, moving with no sail, no oars and no wind. Silent as a shark in the depths. She slid out of the fog like she was a part of it, misty, mysterious, dark, soundless. They pulled along side us, boarded us and not a sailor was alive, all of them, every last one was nothin' but bone. And those glowing red pin pricks where they eyes should be. The soft scrape of their bony feet upon the deck, killing each sailor in swift single strikes. I hid I did, down in the bilges as they raped the decks of all that tweren't nailed down. I heard them feet scraping the decks as they left. I slipped back topside and watched her slipping back into the night. That's when her Captain turned back and stared straight at me, and laughed the laugh of the nine hells.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

It wasn't natural I tells ya. A ship large as a house, black as the night, moving with no sail, no oars and no wind. Silent as a shark in the depths. She slid out of the fog like she was a part of it, misty, mysterious, dark, soundless. They pulled along side us, boarded us and not a sailor was alive, all of them, every last one was nothin' but bone. And those glowing red pin pricks where they eyes should be. The soft scrape of their bony feet upon the deck, killing each sailor in swift single strikes. I hid I did, down in the bilges as they raped the decks of all that tweren't nailed down. I heard them feet scraping the decks as they left. I slipped back topside and watched her slipping back into the night. That's when her Captain turned back and stared straight at me, and laughed the laugh of the nine hells.

The quote that appears on the jacket of the hardcover edition of The Necromancer's Ironclad, from Dire Penguin Books...

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

It occurs to ne you could use a couple I'd Decanters of Endless Water as low power jets...utterly silent.

Note to self: add DoEW to list of surprisingly useful magic items.