Random Gaming Quotes

[Dannyalcatraz]

Player1: "Thanks to my Wizard, the party is safe from that Learnean Pyrohydra!"

Me: "Hmmmm...and what side of the Prismatic Sphere is my Paladin on?"

Player1: "Oh. Crap."

 

[Jon_Dahl]

Player A, tired of player B's extremely annoying mid-level paladin:
"Ok, this is it!! I've had enough!! My character is going a$$rape your character right now!!"

Everyone is quiet, even player B, who knows player A has a stronger character...

DM to player B: "It's ok, your character feels no fear..."

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

DM to player B: "It's ok, your character feels no fear..."

But for the efficacy of my nasal decongestant spray, my iTouch would be covered in snot from the snort that line evoked.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Early on during tonight's session, tonight's host's wife was talking to us about how interesting the game looked...and many other things besides. At one point, she asked what kind of PC she would be most comfy playing, and I immediately responded:

Me: "Bard."

Her: "A what?"

Me: "Bard."

Other player: "Minstrel."

Her: "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?"

*sniggering ensues as we realize he had sort of mumbled and she had misheard, followed by outright laughter as he continued...*

Other Player: "Minstrel! Minstrel! M. I. N. S. T. R. E. L! A troubadour!"

 

[MortalPlague]

How appropriate to find this thread tonight! We had a great line uttered at tonight's session.

The party had camped for the night with a travelling theater troupe (complete with four fancy wagons full of props and costumes and the like). There was a lot of excellent role play between the characters and the NPCs, and I awarded 300 xp for excellent rp.

Quoth one of my players: "Yes! We're good with rp-ness."

My whole table was laughing for five minutes straight.

 

[Wik]

Quoth one of my players: "Yes! We're good with rp-ness."

BOOOOOOOOOOOooOOOOoooOO!

*hisssssssssss*

 

[jonesy]

"Alright, you make camp. But you appear to have run out of food."
"I cook the dog."
"What dog? You don't have a dog."
"Since when?"
"You've never had a dog."
"I thought we had a dog. It bit me back in the city."
"That was the mayors horse. Weren't you paying attention?"
"That doesn't make any sense. Why would the mayors horse bite me?"
"Because you kicked it!"
"I thought it was a dog!"
"How does that make it better?"
"I'm half-ogre. I don't know."
"I cook the half-ogre."
"Yuck! I'm not eating that!"
"We'll just have to go back to the city to get food."
"Can we get a dog?"
Everyone else: "No!"

 

[JacktheRabbit]

Was in a game of Cyberpunk. We were a bunch of bastard mercenaries (of course) in the game and few lived long around us.

In one session we had just had our car blown up on us. Our solution? We stopped someone, pulled them out of their car, killed them, then then stolen the poor guys car. To cut down on evidence of our vicious murder my character had the brilliant idea to throw the dead body on our still burning former car.

Driving away in our "new" car the phone in it rings. My character answers.

Caller - "Hey Joe! Whats up?"

Me - "Joe isnt here."

Caller - "Well where is he?"

Me - "He's at a cook out." Click.

The game had to stop for a good 5 minutes as half of us fell out of our chairs laughing. I had answered deadpan and with no pause at all.

It was epic.

 

[fba827]

"I've got an idea, everybody take off your pants."

.... said in character, right?

 

[Jon_Dahl]

We were on a mission to save some captured (storm?) giant girls. First of us to actually see the girls was our dwarf. He crashed in the door and the practically naked girls were around him, looking startled. Who is this dwarf? Maybe one of the bad guys?

Dwarf was a very efficient man with few word so he didn't say anything. He looked over and saw a hole in the ceiling, too small for the girls but good enough for him. He wanted to reach the hole so he said:

"Bend over!"