I agree that something has to give. Like either tske a completely different approach to the entire game or get rid of minions.
So you're saying it needs to stop being D&D...?
Because that's what I was talking about about "something has to give".
The thing you asked for is
mathematically not possible unless we have an outright exponential growth of both HP and damage. D&D has never has this, and is never
going to have this. That's the only way to
guarantee that something three half-lives ago has been so thoroughly outclassed that it WILL be minion-like: growth such that your damage
floor has become the target's HP
ceiling.
I assumed you didn't want that. I might be wrong about that, but I'm pretty confident you don't want exponential scaling. I doubt you even want linearithmic scaling of damage vs HP (which is faster than linear scaling, but not much.)
The only way to achieve the mathematical result you have requested is either to fundamentally change what kinds of challenge and response are used, such that the kind of scaling you describe is feasible--and thus it stops being D&D. Or, you can give up on achieving this scaling and accept that it is simply impossible to consistently outscale opponents in the way you describe, but that's not really acceptable to the player base as far as I can tell.
Hence, as with a frustrating number of things, we're stuck. We can't change D&D to be something other than what it has been, so that people can have the scaling they want in a naturalistic way. We can't give up on the "you will outscale your opponents" thing, because the players require it. And--as you are now showing--we can't use minions that actually solve the problem because that's an unacceptable path.
This is an insoluble situation.
Something has to give.
I don't have the books at the moment but I remember it being presented as "This is the way." Obviously the WOTC police aren't going to bust down your door if you ignore the rules. But if consistently ignoring the rules is the answer for rules I don't like (and I don't recall anything encouraging house rules in 4e), then it's still an issue with the rules.
I can assure you, you are literally the opposite of correct on this. The system literally does recommend NOT doing this, and explicitly--and
repeatedly--says you should NOT use perfect lockstep stuff because that would be boring. I will dig up quotes later, I'm tired and really should've been asleep two hours ago.