Romance in Roleplaying

[Paks]

How many people have played in games that had in-character romances?
Were they inter-character or between PCs and NPCs? Did it affect how players interacted? Do you think a game with out it is unrealistic, or do you consider it bringing more real-life into the game then you want? How have boy/girlfriends/spouses reacted when they heard about it?

My own experience is limited, but I do wonder how my BF would react if one of the other male player's character started hitting on mine.

 

[RangerWickett]

In my current game, one PC (played by Tom, a married guy [whose wife is so cool]) is in love with an NPC (played by me, who is single). Tom composes poetry toward his PC's paramour. Yeah, I'm a little weirded out, and I remind him occasionally to devote a bit more effort to his real wife.

*grin*

No, really, his character is Aragorn-ish, so being in love with an Elf princess is appropriate. He's playing a romantic hero (in the old-fashioned meaning of 'romance'), which is just as valid an archetype as brooding anti-heroes, pompous and cocky swashbucklers, and bad-ass don't-take--from-no-one spellcasters.

 

[S'mon]

I've played & GM'd them a fair bit in PBEMs, both PC-PC and PC-NPC. They seem to work better in the literary format I think. Some genres are better suited to them than others - eg Anime-type settings are ideal for romance plots, my favourite one ever was in a Bubblegum Crisis PBEM, although there was one with a time-travel game set on the Titanic I liked too. They generally don't seem to work particularly well in regular D&D IMO.

 

[SpiderMonkey]

First of all, welcome to the boards, Paks!

As far as romance in games is concerned, we have usually steered clear of it; in many groups (particularly the typical male-oriented ones) it is awkward at best. In my current campaign, we have been enjoying a subplot in which one character's cohort (who also happens to be that character's gay paramour) has been the object of a female character's romantic attentions. Can you say tangled web?

Luckily, everyone's been pretty cool about it, and it has just sort of been in the background more than anything, so it hasn't been disruptive, either. I'd like to play it up a bit more, but I'm just not that ambitious.

 

[barsoomcore]

It's not for everyone, it's not for all groups, but if it floats your boat then hurrah.

Between players is in my experience quite rare and to some degree "weirder" than PC - NPC -- I suppose because the identification of the DM with a particular NPC is less strong than a player with their PC.

Barsoom has featured a number of romantic sub-plots, some quite significant to the story. None that involved, however, very much actual "role-playing" of flirtation or seduction or any of that stuff. "I flirt with him for a while." -- is usually as detailed as we get.

The Stewardesses, on the other hand, have had no truck with any of that sort of nonsense. They just want to kill things and take their stuff. My kind of girls.

 

[Zappo]

I try it every now and then, but it's... too awkwards. There is a limit to my ability to be into a role, and saying "I love you" to a bearded, fat DM or fellow player is well beyond that limit. It would likely be somewhat easier with a female player, but then other problems would occur (ie, boyfriends and the hilarity of any immature player within ten miles).

 

[Hardhead]

It's always been uncomfortable for me for the same reasons others listed above. If I had a female DM, I'm sure I'd be more comfortable with it. Added to that, my current DM is a bisexual man, so that brings a whole nother level of complications to it.

I've twice had a DM who had "love interest" plots. I don't mind them *too* much, but it's exceeded my comfort level before. I just said, "Hey, Matt, I don't want to roleplay anything further, OK? Can we just say we go to my bedroom, and pick things up next morning?"

The DM was understanding both times.

 

[Gnimish88]

Some years ago, I played with a swinger couple and a friend of theirs. In this case, the husband was GM and both the wife and the friend roleplayed romantic and 'adult' situations, but only with NPCs. On occasion, I felt like telling them to get a room, such when the GM and his wife (who was playing a male character) started getting into more intimate details about 'romantic' encounters. Generally, I take care of the romance end of my life with my fiance and no need to focus such tendencies on imaginary characters.

In so far as how your BF would feel about other guys character's hitting on yours, speaking as a guy with some experience on this, it can feel pretty weird, esp. when you don't normally associate with the guy outside of the game group.

 

[Ottergame]

Right now, I am playing in an online game. My character has fallen in love with someone he met in an inn, and my bard has since taken Leadership to keep this guy around with him. It's actually been a lot of fun to role play out a romance.

 

[jgsugden]

It depends upon your group. I would take following steps before doing it:

1.) Think about your group and make a decisison on whether they are mature enough to accept it. If you don't think they can handle it, don't even bring it up as a possibility.

2.) Ask yourself if it would add something beneficial to the game. If not, ask yourself why you want to have your character have a romance with someone else's character.

3.) Ask your game members what they think of the idea. If anyone is hesitant, don't do it. Some people just can't handle the idea of fictional characters making out.

4.) If everyone thinks it is fine, I suggest a trial run before you develope it as a central theme in the game. In other words, let the PCs/NPCs date before throwing caution to the wind. If it is awkward for anyone, let the two characters split up amicably and speak of it no further.