D&D was a hard habit for me to break. It was my main game for decades. I’ve been through every edition. By the time I stepped away, both my time and expectations had already peaked. I was always open to trying different systems, but most of the games I encountered that promised “D&D, but better” never really gave me something I wasn’t already getting. No system is perfect. D&D had its flaws—but I’d put in the time, money, and effort to make it work for me. I knew its problems, and I knew how to navigate around them. And even after purging a lot of books from various editions, I still had a mountain of material to draw from.
So when I decided I was “done” with D&D, I went looking for alternatives. What I found was that the only real alternative for me was the D&D I already had—specifically the versions I used to enjoy, before the game became something that no longer held my interest. I didn’t need a replacement system. I’d already invested in one that functioned well enough. And honestly, if I ever get the urge to go back, I’ll literally go back—to a version I already own, and still enjoy.
I know that’s not exactly the spirit of this thread. Most people are naming specific games that check off certain boxes or scratch particular itches. But when I tried to fill the void D&D left behind, I realized that every “almost-D&D” still came with its own compromises. Learning a new system, buying new books, adapting to a different rhythm of play—it just wasn’t worth it for the type of game I was trying to replace. If I’m going to deal with trade-offs, I’d rather stick with the ones I already understand.
What changed wasn’t my desire to move on from D&D entirely—it was my understanding of what else was out there. Instead of looking for alternatives to D&D as a replacement, I eventually found alternatives to D&D as options. The systems I invested in didn’t push D&D off my shelf; they took a seat next to it. They gave me different kinds of experiences that D&D wasn’t built to offer, while letting D&D continue to do what it already did as well as any game like it.
So for me, the alternative to D&D wasn’t a different system. It was a different relationship with the game I already had.