The Agony of No-shows

[Chaldfont]

I treat my game like any other social event--the only difference being that we play every week on Thursday night. There's only four of us, so one no-show can kill a session. But we are all good friends. Gaming is just an excuse to get together. We don't penalize someone for not showing up, even if it's last minute. Sometimes we play without him, using his PC as an NPC. Sometimes we play a side game/campaign. If two people can't make it, we cancel. We'll just pick it up next week.

We are very laid-back gamers.

 

[Thornir Alekeg]

We had eight players in my group. No shows were not uncommon, but not calling or e-mailing the day of the game was rare. In one instance it was the person e-mailed me (since I was DMing and hosting) but sent the e-mail to my work account instead of the home account. One other instance where we hadn't heard from the missing player, we finally heard from his wife about four hours after the game started; the player had been taken to the ER. We were all pretty understanding in the end, but there were a lot of people feeling guilty for the things said about the player before we found out what had happened.

We played on best we could around no-shows. For games I DM I requested that everyone get me a copy of their character sheet so we could play on with the characters present (but shuffled to the background).

 

[farscapesg1]

On a slightly different tangent, if you don't want to game with a particular group anymore don't "no show" them. Have the maturity to let them know that your styles just don't mesh. This at least allows them to make arrangements for your absence before game day.
QUOTE]

We've had this recently also. The last two players in our group have done this. No communication with the group or the DM that they aren't going to game anymore. They just stop showing up!!! What is wrong with just letting someone know? It might be one thing if we were gaming with a bunch of younger people where I would expect it, but these have all been people in their mid-late twenties!!! And before anyone jumps on me, yes I know there are many mature teenagers out there, but IMO the older players usually are better about making plans and sticking with them.

 

[fredramsey]

So, it's game day, you've gotten yourself all riled up in preparation for the game, and then, oh, three out of five players don't show up. Only one of them calls to say he won't be making it.

How do YOU deal with this sort of let-down? Because it's made me grumpy.

That rarely happens. We always discuss ahead of time, using a Yahoo group calendar (and a private group) to work these things out.

But, I believe my players, anyway, to not cancel that day unless it is a good reason. They want to game bad enough that it is not a problem.

But, if I were to get no shows, I'll just go with whomever showed it. Can't let things like that bother me.

 

[adwyn]

For my new game I expect to have only two or three of the five players not quite once a month, maybe once every five sessions. Knowing that I'd have this problem I had each player submit a copy of their PC at 2nd level (they're starting at 4th) for "Flashback" adventuers.

When I have a group that cannot otherwise play because of no shows I will then run these earlier versions of the characters through a one shot adventure. Some players may end up playing NPC's instead, but each of the adventures is intended to be a clue as to the overall campaign plot. Thus the game goes on without having to worry about what to do with PCs that haven't showed.

The only drawback is that they know they won't die, but that should make for some theatric encounters.

 

[kenobi65]

One group I DM always has problems with players not being able to make every session. Of the 8 players, three or four will always be there, and there's two who will be there about one out of every two sessions, at best. (Fortunately, if someone's unable to make it, they nearly always let me know ahead of time.)

The rule in the group used to be: "we play as long as we are short no more than 2 players". And, if you weren't going to be there, you were responsible for getting your character sheet to the DM, so someone else could play your character. Eventually, I found that to be disruptive (couldn't always get current character sheets, some players in the group weren't capable of running 2 players, etc), so when we started a new campaign, I decided that each session's adventure would be a self-contained thing, and we'd play with whoever was able to come.

 

[sniffles]

I think it's extremely rude for players not to notify the GM when they won't be present. We all know life happens, but it's just common courtesy to pick up the phone and give a brief explanation. I wouldn't game with people who can't be bothered to let the rest of us know when they're not available.

 

[Banshee16]

I'm having trouble with that lately myself. We generally schedule for the same night, to make it easier to schedule around it. I had 3 players, but often found that if one cancelled, another would, and then there was no sense in running the game.

I added 2 more players, so I've got a group where even if 2 don't show, we've got enough to run the game. If people are consistently unable to show, I usually give them a warning, and if it continues, I tell them that I'm going to have to find another player who can show more consistently.

I'm having a bit of trouble this summer, because the entire group has been largely unavailable...people camping, one player who just had a baby a month ago, etc. We're all hoping it'll get back to normal in August when schedules return to a regular format.

If by end of summer the situation continues, I'll be adding more players.

Banshee

 

[Henry]

I see it this way: Gaming is a social event, like an RSVP party, a double-date, etc. If someone doesn't take 30 seconds to call and leave a message on my answering machine and they DON'T have an emergency, then that's simply inconsiderate. We have a yahoo group specifically to schedule the game day, and if I haven't heard anything before the weekend, I usually call the co-DM to find out if we are having one. Then we check with each player and get a definite yes or know, and any "maybes" we don't count on showing up. We then gauge what we're playing by the definites.

I wouldn't stand someone up for a social engagement without at least a voice mail, and I expect the same courtesy.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

They get a warning.

They do it a second time, they're out. In the age of cell phones, situations where you cannot even call should be exceptionally rare.

If you want to waste my time, I don't want you in the game.

Of course, I have seen that only too often when I was player, not DM. People would just decide not to show up, and would not bother to tell the DM. As a result, we would sit there sunday afternoon, having declined invitations for other activities so we could play and all, and the game just got cancelled due to extreme lack of players. That day is essentially ruined.