The allure of locked threads

[Mark CMG]

I cannot resist checking out locked threads either, I confess.

My name is Mark Clover and I was a Closed Threads reader.


Some folks use a twelve-step program to overcome alcoholism. Others break the addiction of line dancing with a two-step program. I have split that difference and come up with a seven-step program to curb the allure of the Closed Threads.


Step 1. Admit that Closed Threads have an irresistible power over those genetically disposed.

Step 2. Start a new thread as a journal so that others become aware of your plight and can chastise you often as a reminder of your weakness.

Step 3. Take a nap. (This isn't meant to be work.)

Step 4. Let someone know that being honest is part of your recovery process, then proceed to use that as an excuse to bring up uncomfortable subjects.

Step 5. Adjust your sig to something that links others to all known Closed Threads you have ever read so that they might become addicted and can then share your pain.

Step 6. Grab a snack. (Still ain't work, friend.)

Step 7. Never speak of it again, allow others to whisper behind your back about your recovery, and secretly continue to read all of the Closed Threads you desire. Remember, the Closed Threads aren't the problem. People knowing that you read them is the problem.


There, in a nutshell, is your salvation...

 

[Arnwyn]

Anyone else find themselves doing the same thing? Or maybe I should phrase it differently- does anyone else *not* do the same thing?

I love reading locked threads... I'll read the whole thing, from start to finish.

I'm sick.

 

[Mark CMG]

I love reading locked threads... I'll read the whole thing, from start to finish.

I'm sick.

You might change your tune once you've been capitalized...

 

[Darrin Drader]

Trainwrecks are exciting; trainwrecks in slow motion especially so.

 

[Jdvn1]

I love reading locked threads... I'll read the whole thing, from start to finish.

I'm sick.

I do the same thing unless it's really really long.

 

[Darth K'Trava]

I'll usually read the last post to see why. Maybe skim the thread if it's not too long...

 

[Dog Moon]

Somehow I half expected this thread to be locked, but alas! despite being nearly 10 months since the last post, this has not happened.

 

[kirinke]

People like looking at even vaguely naughty things. So. Locked threads are an exhaustable font of amusement.

 

[Michael Morris]

Simple. Admins can reply to any post regardless of status as long as it isn't deleted.

 

[Dinkeldog]

Somehow I half expected this thread to be locked, but alas! despite being nearly 10 months since the last post, this has not happened.

I did worse--I stickied it. And since we all know that noone ever reads a stickied thread of any type, it was even worse than consigning it to locked thread status.