Philodendron said:
If I see DnD artwork that, to me, seems amaturish and clumsy, I think it's an opportunity lost to tap into the imaginitive well of inspiration. So surely it's just as valid, if someone spots a use of language that is clunky and uninspiring, to hope for something better and more professional in that realm, too.
Oh, indeed. But most of the complaints that started this thing have nothing to do with obviously clumsy wording. They are very nitpicky little points. For instance:
Is anyone else bothered by the poor writing? For example, in the first paragraph, we find that "... pit fiends form an elite ruling class that oversees vast numbers of lesser devils." Then two paragraphs later, we learn, "... pit fiends command vast numbers of lesser devils." Um, duh, I just read that.
Nitpicking a repetition. There's nothing inherently wrong with repeating important points.
And the pit fiend "wears an ornate breastplate decorated with evil symbols and runes." Oh, really, the big nasty devil has evil symbols? I'm shocked because in my last 3.5e game the pit fiends all had Barney embroidered on their chests. Not to mention that I'm really glad I'm clear on the fact that the breastplate has symbols and runes.
Setting aside the snarkiness in this comment, how else are they supposed to communicate that the breastplate has symbols and runes without stating it? Are we supposed to guess? And using adjectives for emphasis is fine. They could have just said symbols, sure, but there's nothing wrong with emphasizing the evil.
We also have this gem: "Penetrating the defenses of a pit fiend's castle and destroying the mighty devil in its own demesne is a deed of truly epic proportions." Even if we accept that penetrating and destroying should be considered a single deed and thus agree numerically with the singular verb (and I can agree to that - it's just a little awkward), why do I need to be told that a Pit Fiend Level 26 Elite Soldier (Leader) is a "mighty" devil? Gosh, I might have confused him with all those weak and pathetic Level 26 Elite Soldiers (Leaders) from the Nine Hells. And: "truly epic proportions"? Truly epic? Not just a little epic, or somewhat epic, but truly epic? Are they sure?
Nitpicking on whether the act above is a single deed or multiple deeds, nitpicking on an adjective used to emphasize that the devil is, in fact, mighty. Nitpicking the adverb used to emphasize the epic-ness of the deed(s). These complaints are just snarky nitpicks.
I certainly agree that plainly bad writing would be a terrible thing for 4E. But the nitpicks above are plainly and simply a matter of taste. You're right to call it art, and there is no right and wrong in art. Many masterpieces admired by art critics are boring and inconsequential to the general public. The most popular movies are often reviled by movie critics. Tastes differ greatly between people.
Things that stick out to some people as bad writing will be completely irrelevant and inconsequential to the great majority. Deleting all those adjectives, on the other hand, could lead to dry and boring prose, of which 3E suffered.
