What would a Tiefling fighter be without a Flaming weapon?
A Tiefling fighter.

What would a Tiefling fighter be without a Flaming weapon?
A Tiefling fighter.![]()
Nope, the definition of Metagaming is when your CHARACTER makes a decision in game with the knowledge that the game is just a game and therefore works in a certain way.1) He's metagaming, unless his character has been told in game as a plot point the the Sword of Foo will help him defeat the evil lich king. My game culture strongly discourages metagaming.
This can be done just fine with wishlists. You just add one step at the beginning where the player asks for an item and then the DM says "Alright, I'll drop some hints in game where you can find it and your character can follow those to try to get it."2) If she has been told the Orb of Reckoning will help defeat the hobgoblin menace, it becomes a plot point and an adventure to find it is called for, the result of which is the defeat of a miniboss and the Orb as treasure.
It's not about crying or being a three year old. It's that the game is more fun when you can do cool stuff. If your DM hands out the appropriate amount of magic items but gives you entirely items that aren't useful for your character, then you are only getting 20% of the standard wealth in the game. This means that over the course of the game, you'll eventually have quite a bit less powerful items than you should. The difference between having a +6 weapon, armor, and neck item and a +3 of those same items at 30th level is the difference between life and death.3) If you find the Fiddle of Happy Times and Sad Times Too and you don't want it, deal with it in game. Find someone in a major city to sell it to, pick up a new hobby, or trade it to a minstrel for a tip on where to find that Cape of Neck Slot Checkbox Ticking. Don't cry about it like a poorly-raised three-year-old.
Seems like the random magic items tables might be perfect for the next adventure tool. Tables are much easier to keep up to date if they're electronic.
Man, has WoTC said that they're even going to take the monster builder out of beta yet? Or make the encounter builder... you know, more useful? My days of hoping that the DDI would mature into something have quickly faded into the gray.