Thanks all
I still haven't gotten through all the posts, but thanks for the outpouring of support and discussion.
Sorry I didn't respond sooner. I'm in the military, and things get hectic.
Overall, here's the situation:
Yes, I KNOW 3.x is not balanced. As a DM, I constantly find myself writing a supplement-sized booklet on "house rules," in order to lay the ground work for the way I want my game to work. I also understand that your "typical" party will mow down the "typical" encounter without batting an eyelash. I have no problems with a challenge...I like challenges. I just don't like DMs on ego trips, or those who railroad the PCs.
I did not go back to that DM, or any of the other 7. They can't play, and when I offered advice, they (mostly politely) informed me that me and my 9-odd years of DMing experience were wrong, and they were going to keep doing it their way. I don't mind deviousness (I applaud it), and I don't mind a stiff challenge, especially if the PCs are doing something dumb (yeah, us group of 1st level characters are going to see if that 500-year old legend of a giant red dragon are true). I don't even mind a few mistakes on a DMs part. I mind people who can't take constructive criticism.
A decent game? A decent challenge? Yes, I found one. Of all things, a 1st ed. game. DM has 20 years playing...still has his little white box, heh heh. Been playing with him for 9 months, but I still wanted a chance to finally PLAY my 3.x game, dangit (and other miscellaneous expletives). But here I am back in the old classic.
Well, my 7th level fighter, assisted by a 6th level fighter, and 8th level thief, and an 8th level magic-user, barely survived, but successfully minced, a pair of glabrezu in our last game. Now, if we can figure out where these minotaurs learned how to wield magic, summon demons, and where the rest of our party is, we'll be fine....
-Loki