What's the most rat bastard thing you've ever done as a DM?

*Feelings of DM-inadequacy welling up*

Wow. I... I suck compared to all of this...

I've at least got a little rat bastard in me... but I can't post it just yet... the players are in the middle of the combat where they find out what I've got cooking for them... :D
 

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I realize that not all of these qualify as true rat bastardy. Some of them are more in the other category, but they're all pretty fun.

***Wow, that's alot longer than I expected.

My personal act of rat bastardy was an entire Star Wars (WEG) campaign. Set during the Tales of the Jedi era, it involved three worlds (with no space travel) linked by Force created hyperspace tunnels, an Ecchlesiarchy, a Feudal Society, a race of tribal slaves, and an ancient Dark Jedi. I had two different groups of 6 Jedi PCs running through it simultaneously, occasionally meeting up together. The consequences of one groups actions often rippled across to the other.

I think the best part was when two of the PCs discovered that the Priests of the Ecchlesiarchy viewed the Force from a "balanced" perspective. They pointed out that the Force is a manifestation of all natural, living things and that anger is a natural emotion. They slowly eroded the intellectual difference between the Light Side of the Force and the Dark Side. Then, they informed the PCs that they had found a way to "cleanse" themselves of excessive Dark Side energies. All they had to do was engage in "communion." Communion involved the consumption of a small wafer of a spongy material. After they did so, the one character who had a Dark Side point discovered that it had gone away.

Subsequently, they discovered that the wafer was the flesh of the ancient Jedi (who had been corrupted by the energies of the Dark Side and now lived in zero-g in a space ship hidden in a nearby gas giant). By eating it, they gave him access to their rage and hatred (making him more powerful-- everytime they used a Dark Side power, he got the Dark Force point). Furthermore, when the other team eventually took a lightsaber to one of the priests, they discovered that long term exposure to the wafers slowly turned the user into the same type of material.

Of course, since the Dark Jedi was powering the hyperspace they couldn't just kill him outright. If they did so, the billions of people on the city world and the entire tribal race on the desert world would die. While the nobles on the agrarian world were okay with this scheme, the players really weren't. Eventually, they discovered that the tribal race's elaborate ritual prayers were actually the piloting techniques for spaceships hidden under their world's sands. Of course, they still had to convince the former slave race that transporting food and supplies between the worlds of their oppressors was a good idea.

Eventually, of course, the heroes negotiated an agreement between the nobles, the former slaves, and the lower ranking (and not outright evil) priests to establish a short term government until the Republic could send diplomatic aid.

Other good acts of rat bastardy that I've had the joy of observing was the GM who was running a Mage oneshot where the PCs were either Technocracy agents or Tradition mages working together under duress to investigate a Technocracy construct in Seattle that had dropped out of communication. The party didn't know it at the time, but the head of the construct was a barabbi (a Mage allied with the Nephandi (mages allied with the forces of evil and corruption ala the Great Old Ones and Demons)) and was working fully for his true masters.

Like I said, no one in the party knew what was going on. Not even at character generation. I took the GM aside and asked if I could play a MIB (man in black) barabbi. I played the character pretty straight laced, with sadism as a flaw (I gratuitously broke a mortal NPC guard's arm). Since most of the party were Tradition mages, everyone chalked my brutality up to my being an MIB. At one point, the Tradition mages split off to deal with one problem, leaving myself and the other Technocracy mage alone. At this point, the head of the construct contacted us . . . imagine my surprise when I discovered we were both playing for the same team.

I convinced my partner not to interfere with us and then lured the party into a trap. Since this was so totally unexpected, the GM allowed them to escape, but in my book this could easily have been a TPK.

Finally, while playing a published adventure with the D&D logo on it, we found ourselves up against a monster with DR xx/+2 and no +2 weapons. We needed to have an NPC draw the blood of a demon. We caught the demon, stunned it, but the NPC couldn't do enough damage to hurt it. Eventually, the demon woke up, ate the NPC, and turned invisible. Then the watch arrived. We were tried and convicted of murder, forced to pay for the NPC's raising, we had to pay him 5,000 gp in restitution, and serve a sentence of community service measured in years. It could have been worse, but we presented pretty convincing evidence that we were actually in the process of saving the world, so they geased us to return when we were done. We later discovered that the weapon we needed was in an appendix . . . but not included in any other part of the adventure.

In the same series, while infiltrating a castle full of gnolls, our cleric made a mistake. Although the adventure had been written to take into account that a party would have to fight its way through the gnolls (it stated that the gnolls were used to fighting in the halls and that the sounds of normal combat wouldn't bother them), our cleric (who wasn't really all that bright) decided that he needed to use a thunderstone to stun a group of bad guys. The DM ruled, quite rightly, I believe, that the sound of the thunderstone was not "normal combat" and we suddenly had 82 gnolls attacking the party.*

--G

* Fortunately, one member of the party was actually a polymorphed wyrmling silver dragon with a few sorceror levels (he told everyone he was a sorceror/monk . . .) and picked this moment to reveal his true form. His paralysis breath weapon and some good rolls kept the party from dying.
 
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Wulf Ratbane said:
Told a player that nobody liked that the campaign was over.

Then continued to game without him.


Wulf
I KNEW it! You DID play Bastion of Broken Souls after all! Just without the peck/paladin. ;)
 

Not sure if this counts but I gave a player some really nice metal armor and weapons then two sessions later had him face an empowered dire Rust Monster. No more toys.
 

DON'T LOOK SILVERTABLE

Looking back at Pirate cat's first answer....that's damn close to something I'm working on with Planar Gate. I have it planned that =EDITED= stole a powerful artifact from =EDITED= and uses it to =EDITED= the king (a paladin himself, no less). To save the world and finish the mission they must decide whether to =EDITED= the item thus revealing the secret identity of =EDITED= to the king and thus destroy his rulership and country or ignore it thus dooming everyone later on and failing their mission for a lesser god.

Stay out Silvertable!!!!!!!!!!
 

minor league

For a little irritation, I rather enjoyed a low level pickup game where the evil illusionist cast a harmless fog cloud to escape. To describe the spell, I asked the players if any of their PC had ever seen a Cloud Kill spell.
I never did get an answer. They were too busy rushing for the door [which I unkindly kept locked until the fog rolled over them.]
 

Shortest moment of evil ever. DC Heroes game.

I gave one of the PCs a job offer. From Lex Luthor.

He said yes.

'Nuff said.
 

Fantasy-related moment of frustration and evil.

A diamond the size of the head of any of the players, and more gold than they could carry (literally).

In a room which also contained a very very large bomb. With the fuse lit and seconds to go.

After a minute's agonising, two members of the party ran in...

You can guess the rest.

(In my defense, I did randomise the timing of the explosion, and the PCs were just horribly unlucky!)
 

A few years back, I was playing with a group of pretty obnoxious munchkins. I might have been able to make good powergamers out of them, if they'd shown any interest in actually learning the rules...

Well, the worst offender was the party's Mage, who quite frequently demanded an artifact. Of course, I'm not fond of artifacts in general, and typically avoid them... but after several months of this, when the PCs reached 9th level, I set them on the trail of a very powerful Necromancer who had been searching for the Hand of Vecna and was building an undead army as he went-- destroying towns and reanimating them.

After several adventures, the party managed to do some damage to his undead army, and they finally got close enough to the Necromancer to fight him. It was a hard fight, because he was a higher-level character than they were and he had several powerful magical items. However, what really drew their attention was the wrinkled, disembodied hand hanging on a thong around the Necromancer's neck.

The Mage, of course, howls "Mine!" and jumps on it, and casts Detect Magic. Necromancy. All kinds of Necromancy. Deadly Death Necromancy... of Death! So, he demands the Dwarven Fighter hand over his battle axe. Of course, the Dwarf doesn't like magic, so he hesitates... the Mage demands the axe, and the rest of the party backs him up. The Dwarf hands over the axe.

I tell the Mage's player that it's not a good idea, and I make him roll a saving throw vs. Paralyzation to not pass out from shock. I warn him in advance of this, and tell him that noone would just cut off their hand like that. He feeds me some line about how his character is all battle-hardened and tough, so I shrug. He slams the axe across his wrist, takes a few hit points and rolls his saving throw, which he succeeds.

Then, he presses the shriveled hand against the stump and... nothing happens. He tries again, and nothing happens, and he tries tying it to his stump in hope of it attaching later. The Cleric offers to heal him, and he screams "No! It has to attach on its own!" So, they bind the wound, and he keeps the stump attached to his wrist.

After a few days, it still doesn't work, so ambition wins over paranoia and they take the Hand to a sage. The sage spends a couple hours with it, and tells them it's not the Hand of Vecna.

It's a regular mummified hand with Nystul's Magic Aura cast on it-- several dozen times.
 

Too late to post any campaign spanning rat bastardness, but I have a couple of "got ya" shorts.

I set up one dungeon with most all of it being creatures that damage weapons or equipment (slimes and rust monsters and such), then at the end of it they run into a Death Knight. They attacked him with two rusted kitchen knives, a chair leg and a rotten 2x4 with a couple of nails in the end of it. Needless to say it wasn't a very pretty fight.
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The party was exploring a ancient cursed city, they found a palace with intact catacombs underneath it which they explored. After working their way deep under the palace they defeated the horrible creature that had cursed the city and found the city treasury. The room had so much treasure in it that they were literally knee deep in gold, but when the creature breathed it's last breath a mighty earthquake shook the city and it started sinking. I told them the curse was lifted and the city was sinking, then I held up my watch and asked them what they were going to do. Knowing that I was timing them but not knowing how much time they had they got frantic, one of the characters yelled grab the magic items, they are worth more so they all dropped the bags of gold and all their equipment and grabbed a bunch of items in the room then ran. Once they got out of the city they started trying to figure out what all the magic items they had grabbed were, you could see their faces drop when I pointed out that nobody had actually used detect magic before they started grabbing things. They had dropped all their equipment and supplies in order to grab as much of these "magic items" as they could only to find out that most of them were just old items and weapons. The guy who had nearly died dragging stuff out just so he could save a copper monkey statue and a old tower shield was particularly angry.
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The party had been tracking Frost Giants that had been raiding caravans in a mountain pass. They found the Giant's hide out and set up camp to wait for nightfall, then they attacked. After several hard fights they killed all the Frost Giants except for one who escaped during the battles. They figured they would track down the injured Frost Giant later and decided to celebrate by drinking some Dwarvish Ale the Frost Giants had stolen and roasting a big side of beef they found in the larder. They got so into celebrating that they forgot to go check on the horses they left at the campsite. The next morning they found that the Frost Giant that escaped had brutally slain all their mounts by ripping their legs off, dug through all their belongings and stole or destroyed everything they left at the camp. then defecated in their supply wagon. So they are stuck at the top of a frozen pass with no mounts, very little equipment and nobody really wanted to eat those rations anymore. It really made for a good reoccuring villian, they hated that Frost Giant (and that wasn't the last time he had gotten the best of them even thought they thought they had defeated his plans.)
 
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