EzekielRaiden
Follower of the Way
Seems to me that you're talking past each other.if you don't have a good reason for your players it's 'cause i said so' if you HAVE a good reason YOU don't HAVE to say 'cause I said so"
@Maxperson appears to be saying, "Every choice we make is because we wanted to make it." Which, I mean, that's accurate, but unhelpful.
You appear to be arguing, "A choice can be made purely on a whim, on literally nothing but 'it's what I felt like doing, zero further reason.' Or it can be made very deliberately, with reason and forethought, to seek a specific and identifiable end beyond mere 'I felt like it.'" Which, I doubt anyone will be surprised, is something I completely agree with.
There is a difference between totally arbitrary subjective choice and carefully-reasoned subjective choice. The latter is far more tolerable than the former. Unfortunately, I find that a lot of people who are fans of draconian (heh) restrictions will make a show of doing the latter, but if you drill down about it, the appearance of careful reasoning slowly evaporates and you're left with "because gnomes annoy me," or "dragonborn are just so...so...gauche," etc.
Leaving out dragonborn because dragons are angelic divine beings who don't copulate in the first place? Alright, that's kind of disappointing (seems like they would be a good fit for the aasimar-/tiefling-equivalent in this world!) Leaving out dragonborn because you think they're tacky is rather another story. So is writing (or, oftentimes, rewriting) world-lore for the purpose of enshrining that "because they're just so tacky" stance, since that's rather blatantly petty.
If you're going to ban something because you dislike it, be honest enough with your players to just tell them that. "I just think dragonborn are the stupidest thing ever written, and cannot conceive of a situation where I would enjoy running a game that has even a single dragonborn in it" is a position I rather strenuously disagree with for a variety of reasons. But if you're at least honest enough to say that up front, hey, at least you're clearly and obviously displaying it. I'd still consider it a red flag, or perhaps a yellow one.