Why I Hate Skills

And in this case you are factually incorrect. Most OSR games are very upfront about the function of encounter rolls. That function is only peripherally diegetic (at best). I don't give a good goddamn how many times you repeat the same biased and incorrect things btw, but if your throat is getting sore I'll happily offer you a nice lemon lozenge.
That a monster turns up is "diegetic".

That the GM rolls every <insert period here> to see if a monster turns up doesn't seem very diegetic. It seems like a clock designed to drive gameplay.

That the GM makes additional rolls to see if a monster turns up if the players have their PCs do noisy things (like, say, bash down doors) is gameplay with a diegetic lampshade that is vulnerable to breakage. Eg if the players come up with a solve for the diegetic element (eg the noise of bashing down a door) but still get the gameplay benefit of their action, the GM has to either ignore the diegetic action and make the additional roll anyway; or has to honour the in-fiction solve and allow the players to potentially break the game.

Versions of that last point - across a huge range of issues, not just encounter tables but almost all areas of game play, especially where spells are involved (and game-balance aspects like range, duration etc have some diegetic lampshades hung on them) - are a recurring problem with an ultra-sim game like Rolemaster. I report this from years of experience. (In Champions, @AbdulAlhazred has talked about a parallel example of the wizard character who is built so that all of their abilities are in their staff.)
 

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Sure. And I do.

(And sometimes the answer is, "Ummm....I, you know, Persuade.")

The point I was making is that so many players seem to have gotten used to the idea that that list of skills is similar to a list of spells or class abilities. Buttons to press to make something happen.

This seems pretty easy to me. "Cool. What does that look like?" or a dozen other clarifying questions. If they ask why you need to know just say you need it to determine what the consequences of success and failure are.
 

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