Wouldn't more good faith on both sides of this be better though? One issue I have in these kinds of conversations is, it feels like two sides have been clashing the past several years cultural, and distrust one another, and those of us who enter into the discussion and use a term one of the sides decided indicates something bad, we get slammed for it. I think a better approach if someone uses a term like that and you are a little suspicious of their usage is to just dig into it a little more and ask what they mean, what the specifics of their critique is (they might not even be using the term correctly and be trying to say something entirely different).
I think a big part of what makes media discussions for me exhausting, and why I have substantially pulled back how much I engage with people on social media about media, is there is an unhealthy level of distrust because people have learned to read other issues into where folks stand on something like whether Rey is a good character or not).
For the record, I liked Rey and I thought he actress who portrayed her was very good in that role. But I could understand why another viewer might be annoyed at how powerful she was from the start of the movie (I think a lot of them just wanted to see her train more and work more for her powers, like you often have in many of the martial arts films star wars is emulating). I don't think any of that makes her a mary sue but I can understand someone not sharing my view on the character. I had issues with the trilogy overall, but those issues didn't seem to align with a lot of the discussion around the movies on social media.