Worst character?

[Xarlen]

Hm. It'd be a draw. Same player, two different characters.

I made the mistake of letting him play a spellfire user. He was playing this race from Mythical Races that gave wings and a +2 to con.

To make a long story short, a 6th level character did 20d6 points of damage to a stunned dragon. I ended the campaign shortly after that.

In another game, he played a Half-Dragon Werebear Barbarian/Frenzied Berzerker. WHen it was all said and done, he had a +22 Str bonus. There wasn't any Need for anyone in the party. I was the Half-Fiend cleric, but I still felt pretty useless.

Speaking of Useless, I made the mistake of playing in this guy's campaign. It was high level... But I felt *so* useless. I was playing a Halfling transmuter who's whole schtick was weakening people, cutting them down to size. The two times I ever got off a successful polymorph, the DM subverted me (The BBEG changed it back because he just could, and I polymorphed a hydra, and another one just popped up). I'll note the BBEG didn't have Polymorph on his spell list. The only thing I was ever useful for was Mass Hasting the party.

 

[Zappo]

Hm... any male player with a female character. In my experience, they never work.

Powergamed characters, I don't mind them, provided that the campaign is in the correct style. I have a player who is using a permanently Enlarged half-dragon half-orc with a Huge two-handed sword and a girdle of giant strength. He doesn't know what's coming to him, though... (hint: it involves getting him to fly very high and a Mordenkainen's Disjunction).

 

[DM with a vengence]

Several identical elven archers (class is irrelevant, they all used bows) with the name of JAG. It got to the point where...

"Okay, my elven archer takes his bow..."
"CRITICAL MISS! YOU FUMBLE AND SHOOT YOURSELF IN THE EYE! Please roll up a new character."
"Okay, I'm an elven ranger named JAG who uses a bow."
"THE GODS SLAY YOU AS YOU ARE BORN! Please roll up a new character."
"Okay, I'm an elven fighter named JAG who used a bow."
"IN CHILDHOOD YOU FALL OUT OF THE TREE AND DIE! Please roll up a new character."
"Okay, I'm an elven cleric named JAG who uses a bow."
"AS YOU'RE WALKING ALONG THE ROAD LOOKING FOR ADVENTURE A BALOR KILLS YOU! Please roll up a new character."

I hated to friggin JAGs.

 

[Ave Rage]

My worst character was Ave Rage:

I finally got a group together to start gaming. I decided that I'd start a farmer (fighter class) who uses a Scythe (Dungeon Siege anyone?). Anyways, we start to roll stats and this is what I get:

14, 11, 14, 11, 11, 10

That's when the name "Ave Rage" popped in. Incase some of you are a little slower than the rest, it spells 'Average' when you push em together. The rules say you can reroll if you have neg' stats or something but Ave made it by a hair so I stuck with him.

Our adventure got started with some fights in a mine. We fought about 'hypnotized regular people' who had an armor class of 10. Easy right?

MISS
MISS
MISS

skipping alot of boreing walking around we find some spiders and I follow some hypno-dude down a shaft and find Ave confronted with a spider. He turns tail and runs.
DM: "roll to see if you run away"
ME: oh.. I see I've rolled a one.
DM: you fall down, the spider jumps on your chest, what do you do?
me: I use my torch to knock it off.. *roll* *miss*
DM: it bites you.. roll for a save (the save was 9 or above)
me: ...4
DM: everything swirls around you.. into blackness.

It just goes to show that you need HERO'S, not regular people to save the world.

Of course, right after I rolled those stats my brother rolled 14, 14, 17, 13, 18, 16. He made a cleric which womped on everyone w/out using spells. CURSE HIS STAT STEALING ABILITIES!

 

[RogueJK]

DM: "roll to see if you run away"
ME: oh.. I see I've rolled a one.
DM: you fall down

*sigh*

/me walks away, shaking his head and muttering. "Some people really shouldn't be DMing..."

[sarcasm] What's next? Eating checks? Thinking checks? "Whoops, you failed your Talking roll. You bite your tongue." "Uh oh... you rolled a 2 on your Walking check. How many ranks do you have in Walk?" [/sarcasm]

 

[Andrew D. Gable]

A while ago, I mentioned a player in a thread on "worst PC names", and mentioned how his names sucked...the mention of the chronic munchkin who doesn't name his characters rings true here. His PCs never had names until they reached 10th-level. Never.

The worst, to me, was his last character, an elven mage named Jay-Ron Dunn. Of course, like every other character this guy ever ran, he was 6'8", 350 lbs (despite our protests against this - can you picture an elven football player?). Threw a tantrum when we wouldn't let him dual-wield greatswords, and finally used a single greatsword in combat, decking himself out in a suit of full plate (and never slinging a spell once). Once he dropped out of the group (well, not formally, he just stopped showing up), he was demoted to being a Nodwick-esque figure. Hell, when we used minis, he was represented by an Overburdened Henchman.

But that was more of a bad player. Even when he showed up, all he did was sleep - and he'd make all dice rolls on the floor, so the DM couldn't see them and he could easily make up a lie about his results.

Although in terms of bad naming, nothing will ever beat Yasraena Azzahir'Akim Xorlarrin (and her dire werewolf animal companion, Oliver!), the lesbian drow archer counterpart to Drizzt. Althoguh I actually liked that character...

 

[Buttercup]

I once played a female halfling rogue in a party of five. There was a male, half-elf sorcerer who insisted on taking *everything* as a sexual reference. It was boring and annoying.

But now that I think on it, that player always plays characters who take everything as sexual references. I could comment, but Eric's Grandma would blush if I did.

 

[Ulrick]

Now, in this instance I'm not certain whether if my character was the odd ball one or all the other PCs in the group.

I got invited to play in a campaign by the DM. He said I could just roll up anything I wished, but I had to start at 1st level. So I played a bard.

I asked the other players what classes they had--fighter, cleric, wizard. Okay, great. We're fairly balanced.

During the first combat I realized what I had gotten myself into.
We fought basilisks. I panicked.

The guy playing the fighter said, "No don't worry, I'll handle it."
He had a 10th level HALF-DRAGON/OGRE! The cleric was also 10th level and an Aassimar. The guy playing the wizard I think was a Wemic or something or something similar...oh yeah, he was 1st level too.

The fighter wound up wrestling the damn basilisks and showing off his "Kewl Powerz" while everybody else just sat around and watched. Finally, after about an hour of jacking around and a joking spouting off every five minutes, I got fed up. I walked up to a basilisk and tried to stab it in the eye. I failed. I got turned to stone.

The player with the cleric said, "I don't think I want to take that character adventuring with us anymore."

And even after rolling my eyes and packing things up the guy with the wizard offered to put up money to bring my character back.

That was one of the worst games I've played in.

Ulrick

 

[Romotre]

The worst character might have been the lvl 1 human male fighter. He had a long sword and a shield. He wore chainmail armor. He had a torch for when it was dark. he ate rations. he carried about half a year of rations with him - no problem. he fought kobolds, goblins and an orc once. He stayed at the inn and bought a dagger from the blacksmith...wait a second this was dnd when i was 7...

Currently the worst player is the one the inspired my sig. its a real quote. you'll say "it's your turn, what do you do?" and he'll stare at your or 2 minutes then ask to have the map explained again. he thinks the goal of dnd is to get as many different classes as possible (bard/psion/psy war/fighter/rogue/monk). he imagine any scenario, thus he can never react to anything. he tried to use expertise as a reflexive action (ie "DM: they charge him: I use expertise!"). he spends 4 hours (no really) making a character (of any level). i told him that my character could cast earthquake 9 times per day (yes the 9th level spell) when we were 3rd level and he said, "really, that helps a lot."

Maybe the other player is worse, the typical min/max power gamer no roleplaying always chaotic neutral type. his characters obviously must have been born yeesterday because they have no sense. he'll get in arguments with kings (his own kings, about to send him on an adventure) not to mention he brutally murders people and doesn't seem to care (alignemtn change? never, then he couldn't do whatever he wanted to and pass it off as CN behavior).

that felt good.

 

[Frosty]

The worst I played with:

Dwarven sorcerer with toad familiar who polymorphed himself into a firegiant then and cast Tenser's transformation. He had lots of potions of heroism.