Ankh-Morpork Guard
First Post
John Crichton said:
Is this the forum for that?
Yeah, that sounds more like House Rules territory than entertainment.
X-Men 2 = Frickin' Kewl Flick!
- Thread starter Viking Bastard
- Start date
Yeah, that sounds more like House Rules territory than entertainment.
Ranger REG
Explorer
"House Rules"? The highlighted statement is bordering on PENTHOUSE!Ankh-Morpork Guard said:
Yeah, that sounds more like House Rules territory than entertainment.
Mathew_Freeman
Adventurer
John Crichton said:
Ladies and gentlemen! We present, stolen from the future (don't ask us how, we don't know!) lyrics from LotR: The Musical. The notation "Gollum!" has been used to signify the throat wrenching noise he occasionally makes.
Castle On A Cloud, sung by Gollum
There is a castle on a cloud
GOLLUM!
I like to go there in my sleep
GOLLUM!
Aren't any floors for me to sweep
GOLLUM!
Not in my castle on a cloud
(But they tortures us, they do...)
There is a room that's full of toys
There are a hundred boys and hobbits
(We hates them, precious...)
Nobody shouts or talks too loud
Not in my castle on a cloud
GOLLUM!
There is a lady all in white
(Elfses! Ack!)
Holds me and sings a lullaby
(It burns! It burns!)
Shes nice to smell and she's soft to touch
(IT BURNSSSS USSSS, PRECIOUSSSS!!!)
She says "Smeagol, I love you very much..."
I know a place where no one's lost
I know a place where no one cries
Crying at all is not allowed
(Or they beats, you, precious)
Not in my castle on a cloud...
GOLLUM!
-----------
Thank you, thank you...
Dark Eternal
First Post
Tallarn, that was a gratuitious display of talent, and you know it. I should fine you, but that would be contradictory, since I awarded you two cool points for that little masterpiece.
If I thought that you had wracked your brains for ten minutes to produce that, I wouldn't be so jealous.
Bastard.
Now, to go back to salivating in preparation for our weekend expedition to X2...
If I thought that you had wracked your brains for ten minutes to produce that, I wouldn't be so jealous.
Bastard.
Now, to go back to salivating in preparation for our weekend expedition to X2...
John Crichton
First Post
* clap clap *Tallarn said:
That was pretty good.However, I just realized that two of my favorite things combined may not be so good (Les Mis & LotR). It's like really good food, sometimes they just taste like poop when eaten together. The visual is damn funny, tho.
And to veer this vaguely back on topic: What about X-men: The Musical? Can't you just see Rogue & Wolverine doing "A Little Fall of Rain"... I'll leave you with that.
Mathew_Freeman
Adventurer
Roflmao!
I'll get back to you on that one, I'm sure I can think of something...
"Do you hear the mutants sing?"
I'll get back to you on that one, I'm sure I can think of something...
"Do you hear the mutants sing?"
Eridanis
Bard 7/Mod (ret) 10/Mgr 3
The television ad:
"Return to the world of hobbits, wizards, and balrogs in this enchanting new musical. From the makers of Riverdance, comes:
THE LORD OF THE RING-DANCE.
You will believe that Ents can keep time."
"Special guests, Cirque de Soliel as the Uruk-hai!"
(cut to happy viewers outside the theatre)
"I couldn't believe my eyes. I never pictured orcs swinging on a trapeze! What a revelation of Tolkien's work!"
"I liked it better than CATS."
"Dude, I loved it when Gandalf made all the furniture and silverware return to their human forms. Oh, wait, that was BEAUTY & THE BEAST..."
"Return to the world of hobbits, wizards, and balrogs in this enchanting new musical. From the makers of Riverdance, comes:
THE LORD OF THE RING-DANCE.
You will believe that Ents can keep time."
"Special guests, Cirque de Soliel as the Uruk-hai!"
(cut to happy viewers outside the theatre)
"I couldn't believe my eyes. I never pictured orcs swinging on a trapeze! What a revelation of Tolkien's work!"
"I liked it better than CATS."
"Dude, I loved it when Gandalf made all the furniture and silverware return to their human forms. Oh, wait, that was BEAUTY & THE BEAST..."
John Crichton
First Post
* thumbs up *Tallarn said:
I like that one.
I'm beginning to wonder if a geek-genre musical is possible as these are pretty funny... 
With Micheal Flatley as Aragorn. *shudders*
Mark
CreativeMountainGames.com
Master of the Horse
(with Wormtongue, Gandalf, Theodin, Aragorn, Legalos and Gimli, Son of Gloin)
Welcome, My King
Sit yourself down
Now you must rest
Heavy's the crown.
And for a while,
Think not of steeds,
You get your sleep
I'll do the deeds!
(aside)
Seldom do you see
Honest men like me
A gent of good intent
Who’s content to be
Master of the horse
Doling out the charm
Ready with a whisper
That'll cause some harm.
Tells a little lie
Keep him off his guard
With an instrumental voice I'm a verbal bard
Glad to help the kingdom languish
Helps me out a bit in kind
But no need to thank me
Eowyn will do just fine!
Master of the horse
Trusted to the End!
Glad to be so helpful
To my wizard friend
Used to dress in white
Though his heart is black
Now of many colors
And he won’t look back
Saruman looked in the crystal
The future Middle-Earth is here
Shouldn't have no problems
Stormcrow's the only one I fear...
(Gandalf enters and sings)
Master of the horse?
Give a wiz a break
Get down on your belly
You're a loathesome snake!
Did you even think
I would not return?
I can walk through fire
And I won't get burned!
Now that I'm in White it's easy
Breaking You and Sarry's spell
(Théoden stands and sings)
Oddest thing about it
Suddenly I'm feeling mighty well!
Strap on my armor
Bring me my sword
No more to listen
To venomous words.
Grima you tricked me
But I'll not scorn
Off to your master
Now sound out the horn!
(Gandalf sings again)
Good to see you up
No time left to lose
Saruman is moving
Now you have to choose
You could fight right here
But I've got a plan
Helm's Deep is much better
For both horse and man
Look what else I brought
Aragorn the King
Legalos and Gimli
But, of course, no ring!
(Théoden sings again)
Friends you are all more than welcome
Though the days are dire, true
Glad to have you here
But I doubt our swords will do!
(Gandalf sings again)
I will go ahead
Find your son and more
If he isn't dead then we'll see you at dawn
Hold out as best you can
Worthy of a song
I'll take Shadowfax and I will not go wrong
(Théoden aside to Aragorn)
I'm sure that when you were a ranger
Far too long you had to roam
Eowyn's compliant
Maybe an alliance
(Aragorn breaks in...)
No, I have an elf back home!
(Aragorn continues)
Master of the horse
Call your army nigh
We won't let a goblin or an orc survive!
( Théoden sings again)
We'll do what we can
Riding to the Deep
Though I long have slumbered
I no longer sleep
(then to Gandalf)
We'll need all the help you muster
Perhaps the trees will polymorph
(Legalos sings)
I'll shoot all my arrows
(Gimli breaks in...)
Just remember never toss a Dwarf!
They all ride off continuing the chorus...
Master of the Horse!...
(with Wormtongue, Gandalf, Theodin, Aragorn, Legalos and Gimli, Son of Gloin)
Welcome, My King
Sit yourself down
Now you must rest
Heavy's the crown.
And for a while,
Think not of steeds,
You get your sleep
I'll do the deeds!
(aside)
Seldom do you see
Honest men like me
A gent of good intent
Who’s content to be
Master of the horse
Doling out the charm
Ready with a whisper
That'll cause some harm.
Tells a little lie
Keep him off his guard
With an instrumental voice I'm a verbal bard
Glad to help the kingdom languish
Helps me out a bit in kind
But no need to thank me
Eowyn will do just fine!
Master of the horse
Trusted to the End!
Glad to be so helpful
To my wizard friend
Used to dress in white
Though his heart is black
Now of many colors
And he won’t look back
Saruman looked in the crystal
The future Middle-Earth is here
Shouldn't have no problems
Stormcrow's the only one I fear...
(Gandalf enters and sings)
Master of the horse?
Give a wiz a break
Get down on your belly
You're a loathesome snake!
Did you even think
I would not return?
I can walk through fire
And I won't get burned!
Now that I'm in White it's easy
Breaking You and Sarry's spell
(Théoden stands and sings)
Oddest thing about it
Suddenly I'm feeling mighty well!
Strap on my armor
Bring me my sword
No more to listen
To venomous words.
Grima you tricked me
But I'll not scorn
Off to your master
Now sound out the horn!
(Gandalf sings again)
Good to see you up
No time left to lose
Saruman is moving
Now you have to choose
You could fight right here
But I've got a plan
Helm's Deep is much better
For both horse and man
Look what else I brought
Aragorn the King
Legalos and Gimli
But, of course, no ring!
(Théoden sings again)
Friends you are all more than welcome
Though the days are dire, true
Glad to have you here
But I doubt our swords will do!
(Gandalf sings again)
I will go ahead
Find your son and more
If he isn't dead then we'll see you at dawn
Hold out as best you can
Worthy of a song
I'll take Shadowfax and I will not go wrong
(Théoden aside to Aragorn)
I'm sure that when you were a ranger
Far too long you had to roam
Eowyn's compliant
Maybe an alliance
(Aragorn breaks in...)
No, I have an elf back home!
(Aragorn continues)
Master of the horse
Call your army nigh
We won't let a goblin or an orc survive!
( Théoden sings again)
We'll do what we can
Riding to the Deep
Though I long have slumbered
I no longer sleep
(then to Gandalf)
We'll need all the help you muster
Perhaps the trees will polymorph
(Legalos sings)
I'll shoot all my arrows
(Gimli breaks in...)
Just remember never toss a Dwarf!
They all ride off continuing the chorus...
Master of the Horse!...
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