A D&D relationship issue

[pawsplay]

If Jack wants Jane at the table, by all means invite her. She is not allowed to set conditions, but by the same token, she should be granted the same lattitude to express herself. This may end up in a farcical situation where one player says, "Poo!" and she responds, "Language, please," but sure, why not? It could still be good gaming.

The important thing, from my standpoint, is that the situation not be manipulated. She should not be asking Jack to act on her behalf, any more than is reasonable to accomodate a new group member, and Jack should be asking the GM for help in changing his gaming group to suit her liking.

Most likely, Jane will yank him out of the game, and you'll know upfront you've lost him from the gang, which is a useful thing to know. But you never know. I've played with some pretty churchy people who were great gamers all the same.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

The implication being that if one doesn't game with cursing and barmaid-cleavage jokes then one isn't an adult?

The implication is that adults should be able to handle rough language and adult situations in the company of other adults without demanding things be toned down to the level of "safe for kiddies" when no kiddies are about.

If you want PG-only entertainment, go to PG-only entertainment, but don't begrudge others their taste for grittier fare. You have no right insist that an R-rated movie be cleaned up simply because you're going to be in attendance.

As for religious gamers:

Personally, I've been a practicing Roman Catholic since birth, and a gamer since '77. I've gamed beside Christians of other faiths, Buddhists, Hindus, Jews, Muslim and even atheists...possibly the odd Zoroastrian and others as well.

As long as nobody's being directly insulting of another's faith- in an obvious "...and I really mean it..." sort of way- things should be cool.

 

[falcarrion]

Give her and her boyfriend the following:

Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

then ask them there opinoin.
then reviel that these lyrics are from a song from John Lennon.
and ask them if this makes him a evil person.

 

[Rel]

Give her and her boyfriend the following:

Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

then ask them there opinoin.
then reviel that these lyrics are from a song from John Lennon.
and ask them if this makes him a evil person.

There is definitely a Yoko Ono joke in this thread somewhere...

 

[amerigoV]

My suggestion is do a dry run. Invite her to witness the proceedings, but not actually play (though of course comments from the peanut gallery are expected).

I think a dry run would be helpful if she plays. Watching gamers game probably would git rid of her real fast (I know that his how I would want to spend an evening... ).

I would do a one-shot mainly so you can show off the fun aspects of the game in a condensed timeframe. Campaigns are long-running stories that will appear very confusing to someone just sitting down at the table for the first time. A short, quick adventure gives a whole picture (start, middle and endpoint). Plus you can assess why she is really there -- is she interested in playing, just wants to be social with her BF, or is looking to smite you heathens.

 

[Gorrstagg]

My instincts...

"I've got a bad feeling about this.."

I think your happy little medium is going to be upset quite a bit.

Unless YOU the DM take a very firm and direct honest approach.

Let your friend Jake know your honest concerns. Right up front. Let him know she's not even on the island, and your theoretically willing to let her get on it. But he shouldn't invite her to join, if sometimes vulgar words are passed around in jest. (Listen to the Penny Arcade/PVP sessions... tons of cursing, cause yeah, they are adults with gamers basement humor.)

The point being.. you're willing to work with him. Though just be prepared for your sense of campaign taking an odd turn when/if she refers to her deity as God.

That's another warning sign. I've got pagan friends in my games, and christians, and "Others", none of them try to play their personal religions. Because they aren't playing themselves. They are playing characters within a specific world. And choose deities from said world.

Just be careful, and let him know your real honest opinion.

You don't want to open the game beyond the current group. And that your worried he's going to change his play style by her attending, and that her playing will change everyone elses style.

I just forsee headaches, but I've had odd things like this happen to me before as well.

I let my friend know that their SO was really dragging down the mood of the table. And suggested that they have their SO spend time with our other friend's SO's who all gathered together that day anyhow.

And in other cases, it's just letting them know up front. I run the game this way. Were all working very well together. And unless that person is willing to adapt to the group style, they shouldn't come play.

Were here to have fun and if that's not happening, because of one person. That's not cool to do to the collective.

 

[Storm Raven]

then ask them there opinoin. then reviel that these lyrics are from a song from John Lennon. and ask them if this makes him a evil person.

How many people do you think have not heard John Lennon's Imagine before? You seem to think that the fact that those lyrics were penned by him will come as a surprise to someone.

 

[Charwoman Gene]

I actually think John Lennon was a totally egotistical SOB whom qualifies as a kinda Diet Coke of Evil.

And any song about the stomping out of all human diversity and individual thought is frightening and disturbing.

WTF does this have to do with gaming anyway? Or is this just your generic DUR_HUR CHRISTIANS ARE DUMB troll?

 

[Korgoth]

then ask them there opinoin.
then reviel that these lyrics are from a song from John Lennon.
and ask them if this makes him a evil person communist.

Yes to both?

 

[avin]

There is definitely a Yoko Ono joke in this thread somewhere...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I was waiting for a Bel Air...