I understand some of what you are saying but not all of it.
You had ample time to roleplay your character - I told you I was more than willing to do so in PM's, of older interactions of them, it just came off to me to be you wanted that to be done when you dismissed her. You had a thread all to yourself to play with AB, you could have been playing for months. Neurotic also posted for you more recently and you didn't choose to post with him at all. So, you could have developed Alec more if you wanted. I just figured that wasn't your thing as much. Which is totally cool! I just hope you aren't putting that on anyone here that your character isn't fleshed out well. We've all been more than willing to work with each other building bridges in this game.
Do you really need a reason to cooperate in a PBP gaming - game? I mean, that's generally the point of the thing? You are asking Fenris to have his character bow down to your character the way you don't want to bow down to his. But he's not sitting in a throne room, in his far-off land, he set up as friendly of a location as he could, and I have to say, three players thought this would work for "a jarl coming to retrieve his daughter." I know it's not the best of situations. And I get that maybe in other situations (GoT?) someone might have gone in with fire and more fire.
I get you are playing your character. But this was supposed to lean more "light hearted romp" (the kidnapping part, not Astrid's backstory - yikes) then anything else. Yes, there are some kinks.
Also don't forget that our characters are actually all the same level. So it's not assumed that someone is just going to automatically outpower or outmaneuver everyone else.
Here's the thing. You've already threatened your ally's life. You've threatened your enemy's life (well, you got that one). You haven't given anyone any reason to make this work either. Like, at all.
Astrid would have gone running out onto that beach to greet her father. Thorir would have let her. But you've put me in a situation where I can't do that.
I don't know what to do. Fenris long ago went to bed, he doesn't know what to do. Maybe tomorrow something better will come to mind. Astrid is going to have to compel everyone to get together and talk, isn't she?
I just want us to be one big, dysfunctional (unhappy?) family and play against the real bad guys. I love Alec, and I know he is super devoted to his daughter, which I also love. I just would also love everyone to be together as a party without everyone but Astrid being dead.