When will my group ever accept me?

[Kanegrundar]

Rel, reveal and Joshua Dyal. Ménage à trois of HELL!

Everyone make a SAN check now, please.

Failed as well...that's just...wrong...

I'll be in the corner gibbering incoherently and crapping myself...

 

[DaveStebbins]

I'll just echo what many others have said, but with the words of Theodor Seuss Geisel:

"Be who you are and say what you feel 'cause people who mind don't matter and people who matter don't mind."

-Dave

 

[stevelabny]

See, she's actually gonna take the advice to try to fix the problem on her end. And I'm willing to bet if she relays this story to her gaming group, they'll start to ease up on her too.

Is there where I give her a hug ??(and slap a sign on her back that says "Kick me! I'm a gamer!")

and thats the secret of bluntness.

you run the risk of making the person mad, but when they calm down they see the truth that lies at the center.

when you try to tip-toe around stuff and sugar-coat it and be comforting, you dont run the risk of making the person mad, but theres a good chance they will never pick up the hints and the problem will never be resolved.

I don't mind being the bad guy for a few minutes in order to fix a problem.

I will give the advice someone might not want to hear, I will tell the smelly gamer he smells, and I will get the problematic employee fired. And then the world will be a better place.

The truth might hurt for a bit, but then it sets you free. Or something.

 

[Acquana]

See, she's actually gonna take the advice to try to fix the problem on her end. And I'm willing to bet if she relays this story to her gaming group, they'll start to ease up on her too.

Is there where I give her a hug ??(and slap a sign on her back that says "Kick me! I'm a gamer!")

and thats the secret of bluntness.

you run the risk of making the person mad, but when they calm down they see the truth that lies at the center.

when you try to tip-toe around stuff and sugar-coat it and be comforting, you dont run the risk of making the person mad, but theres a good chance they will never pick up the hints and the problem will never be resolved.

I don't mind being the bad guy for a few minutes in order to fix a problem.

I will give the advice someone might not want to hear, I will tell the smelly gamer he smells, and I will get the problematic employee fired. And then the world will be a better place.

The truth might hurt for a bit, but then it sets you free. Or something.

Or it makes you kind of a jerk. We are all happy you're not a therapist.

But whatever.

 

[nick]

I'm wondering if possibly the girl making the insults is jealous of you, or possibly that's just how she acts normally. I've gamed with a woman who was fine with all of the male players, but was a b**** to any female players, including her own best friend. It's hard to say why anyone does anything, but for all you know her dislike for you could have nothing to do with the game.

 

[BrooklynKnight]

Or it makes you kind of a jerk. We are all happy you're not a therapist.

But whatever.

Yanno, she did take what steve said pretty well, she even saw his point. SHE wasnt upset by how he approached the topic. Why should anyone else be.

 

[nerfherder]

Yanno, she did take what steve said pretty well, she even saw his point. SHE wasnt upset by how he approached the topic. Why should anyone else be.

I think what most people found objectionable was that he would attempt to get work colleagues that he disliked fired. How would you feel if someone at work was trying to get you fired for no other reason than they disliked you?

Other than that, I had no problem with what he said. It's good to get the straight-talking as well as the softly-softly advice.

Cheers,
Liam

 

[MadMaxim]

I guess there isn't a whole lot more to say than hoping you work it out with the other players in your group, Raven.

 

[Psychic Warrior]

See, she's actually gonna take the advice to try to fix the problem on her end. And I'm willing to bet if she relays this story to her gaming group, they'll start to ease up on her too.

Is there where I give her a hug ??(and slap a sign on her back that says "Kick me! I'm a gamer!")

and thats the secret of bluntness.

you run the risk of making the person mad, but when they calm down they see the truth that lies at the center.

when you try to tip-toe around stuff and sugar-coat it and be comforting, you dont run the risk of making the person mad, but theres a good chance they will never pick up the hints and the problem will never be resolved.

I don't mind being the bad guy for a few minutes in order to fix a problem.

I will give the advice someone might not want to hear, I will tell the smelly gamer he smells, and I will get the problematic employee fired. And then the world will be a better place.

The truth might hurt for a bit, but then it sets you free. Or something.

Now go get that annoying guy in accounting with the lisp fired already!

 

[Pbartender]

PBartender... thanks for saying I have a point, but I think you run off on the same incorrect idea that this other girl is being petty and vengeful. I dont think its a case of "You picked one me, so now I pick on you", I think its more like "You picked on me publicly, now you pick on me silently, go away"

No, I'm thinking it's more a matter along lines of, "Girls like you used to pick on me, and I don't want you being better than me at the one thing I'm good at and taking my friends away from me."

But its hard to tell, without asking the girl in question. I'd certainly be surprised if the teasing doesn't have its roots in having the tables turned, for once, on a percieved Cool Kid of a type similar to those who have picked on her before.

No. My boyfriend in High School played RPGs. We're not together anymore.

Gotcha.

I think it's time I have a talk with my boyfriend as to what I've been doing on my Saturday afternoons. I think I should tell him right off, but as for my other friends I think it would be a little odd to just flat out tell them but I woun't hide it from them either, so if it comes up it comes up. We'll see what happends from there.

A tip... Be nonchalant about it. Don't make a big deal about it. Treat it in a manner as if you were heading out to a movie with your friends.

"I'm heading over to Soandso's place for a couple hours..."
"Whatcha guys doing?"
"Oh, we're just going to be playing a little D&D. I'll see you later, bye!"
"Alright... later!"

In my experience, if you treat it like the harmless game it is (instead of like a shameful addiciton), no one seems to mind it any more than any other quirky hobby.