Whoo, I disagree profoundly. A Song of Ice and Fire, the Abhorsen trilogy, The Lies of Locke Lamora, Codex Alera, Bas-Lag, the Taltos books, the Malazan books, Deed of Paksennarion -- all written by people who once gamed regularly or still do, and it frequently shows if it isn't out-and-out showcased (like Mieville's "adventurers" in Perdido Street Station).
It's in that weird place where you can argue that yes, D&D isn't as directly inspired by pre-existing fiction as it once was -- but at the same time, a lot of what's on bookshelves is directly or indirectly inspired by D&D. The only real difference is that most fantasy fiction that owes something to D&D scales back and limits its palette, whereas D&D, as always, incorporates whatever it can into itself.
I don't think you 2 are debating the same thing.
the books B cites are Fantasy novels written by gamers
The books C alludes to are Urban Fantasy novels that have characters that are often gamers.
Running an Anita Blake, Dresden Files, Mercy Thomson RPG game would be quite different from a "traditional" D&D game. Which is what I believe C is talking about.
Urban Fantasy is NOT the same as Fantasy (assuming I mean sword and sorcery for the most part in a pseudo medieval world, definitely not our world in modern times way).
In the case of Codex Alera written by Jim Butcher, who not only is a gamer, but also a LARPer, he also writes the Dresden Files, where the protagonist also plays a D&D-like game.
D&D seems to be inspired by sword and sorcery fiction. It doesn't seem to be inspired by Urban Fantasy, as that genre has a diffrent style than D&D.
For the record, I read Dresden Files. My wife reads a metric-crapton of Urban Fantasy as her current obsession. I've read some of the new comics, and watched the shows with her. I'm fairly "up" on it.
D&D has no Saturday night specials, Chlorofiends, walmart parking lot battles, vampires with teenage angst, issues with the general populace being unaware of the magical, or everything's normal but voodoo and zombie's work.
It just ain't the same, though I could use the rules to run a game (more like d20 modern + the magic add-on)
On the gender thing, It's my observation by my wife's books, that they more often have a strong female protagonist. And a lot of sex. dresden files being the exception (he abstains a lot, and he's a guy). Heck, the Dresden TV show got canceled partly because SyFy bough ads for younger men, but the demographic watching it was 30something women. it also got canceled because the CEO invested in wrestling, and the VP backing the show didn't.