I have to say something. This is a terrible day. This one, single, sole blight on our year, when people who might not realize that their fly is zipped, or that their shirt is not inside out, or that maybe their local store having a -50% off sale, just might not actually be true...Have a prank pulled on them. This a terrible thing, everyone. People who take things too seriously have their feelings hurt, or are seriously confused. I know it's always the same day of every year, but some people just aren't good at pattern recognition, and while most of them get the care and help they need, some of them are left to flounder until they check the calendar on their iPad. Every year, millions of people fall prey to these harmless jests, and take umbrage. They become seriously upset, and post rants about how this day should never happen, because they actually thought, for a whole fifteen minutes, that Pluto had become a gas giant, until they checked the date.
In short, this is a tradegy, and if you have not get the message by now...
...Check the date.
