Part of the bit that bugs me is that the radical stereotypes D&D has are backed up by the mechanics. The stereotype is that elves are more agile then normal and the mechanics of the game the +2 to dex back that up. It makes the in world stereotyping right because it's true.
That's a racial difference, hardly a "radical stereotype". It's the same as saying Storm Giants are stronger than humans.
You can certainly make elves that are different if you find them boring. You can make weak giants too, but they probably wouldn't be very interesting.
Ya.. think about the kind of message that sends.
It sends the message that elves are more dextrous than humans; nothing more.