Obryn
Hero
First off - aaa
Second.
Second, it's a terrible line of argument because you're putting the burden of civility and change-making on the victims rather than the aggressors. You're also opening up settled topics to a whole host of sea-lioning.
Third, who gets to decide who's worthy of engagement? Well, whoever's talking with them, I'd say. It's not like there's an outside governing board who gets to make this call.
And fourth, contrary to your post, declaring that some positions and opinions (and those who hold them dear) are simply not welcome in a society (say, misogyny and racism) can, indeed, create social change. Even if it's not going to change that one guy, there's other folks who may be persuaded, and it can start or preserve a social movement.
Second.
A few quick notes. First, I often see exactly this argument made in bad faith by folks who don't want to change, but also don't want to be called an asshat. Now, not saying this is you, but that's usually where it's coming from. As an example, there's a guy who has worked tirelessly to get people out of the Klan through kindness and caring. Yes, this is an awesome thing to do. But if this extraordinary guy is being held up as an example of what everyone should do, that's a problem.Just letting you know how, 'telling people they're asshats' isn't very effective in terms of promoting change in others. It's a failing strategy, one that promotes confrontation and polarizes opinions. If folks want a fight, ok, then its a great way to get one.
If folks really want to promote change in others they need to step out of the ring, take a deep breath, and meet at the table.
Sure, we can deem some folks not worth the time but then - who gets to decided which folks are worthy? Based on what list of merits? Which prejudices will determine who gets the effort?
I believe the intent is great. Healthy. But the behaviour can often be at best, clumsy and confrontational. Ineffective.
Again tho, this is if folks actually want to promote change in others. If they just want to 'be right' and win some moral victory, then hey. Tell tell away!
Second, it's a terrible line of argument because you're putting the burden of civility and change-making on the victims rather than the aggressors. You're also opening up settled topics to a whole host of sea-lioning.
Third, who gets to decide who's worthy of engagement? Well, whoever's talking with them, I'd say. It's not like there's an outside governing board who gets to make this call.
And fourth, contrary to your post, declaring that some positions and opinions (and those who hold them dear) are simply not welcome in a society (say, misogyny and racism) can, indeed, create social change. Even if it's not going to change that one guy, there's other folks who may be persuaded, and it can start or preserve a social movement.