D&D General Ravenloft, horror, & safety tools...

[Bedrockgames]

It doesn't have to be a debilitating issue for someone for them to rather it not be in the game.

sure but then it isn’t a safety tool or a mental health issue (or a matter of harm): it is a matter of preferences for what isn’t and is in the game

 

[overgeeked]

No. We haven’t. We have empathy and wisdom

Not in my experience. No we don't. That's why we need things like safety tools. Because of the distinct lack of empathy and wisdom.

which I think gives us a way of gauging these things. It isn’t perfect. We can’t get into other peoples heads. But I think often times we get a feeling when someone is lying, exaggerating or pretending (especially if it seems like a trend or fad)

Again, no telepathy. We can't detect thoughts or lies. More often than not we project our thoughts and ideas onto others while they're completely unaware of what's going on in our heads.

 

[Bedrockgames]

I'm also not sure that comparing people wanting safety tools at a TRPG table to the Salem Witch Trials is ... valid.

I am not comparing them. It is a good example of performative behavior though because people know it and it is stark (also I was talking about the European witch craze as well which is a much larger example)

 

[Bedrockgames]

Which brings us back to the question of why is basic humanity to other people so much to ask.

no one is arguing against this

 

[prabe]

I am not comparing them. It is a good example of performative behavior though because people know it and it is stark (also I was talking about the European witch craze as well which is a much larger example)

Um. By calling them both "performative behavior," you're going a fair ways toward equating them, IMO.

 

[overgeeked]

no one is arguing against this

Facepalm.

Not everyone at the gaming table has "basic humanity". Safety tools are a way to enforce some absolute bargain bin basement level of "basic humanity" at the table. You're arguing against safety tools, therefore...

 

[Bedrockgames]

Um. By calling them both "performative behavior," you're going a fair ways toward equating them, IMO.

I am saying both are performative behaviors. But no one is being hanged or burned over safety tools. The situations are not comparable in terms of stakes, morality, scope, time period, etc

 

[DnD Warlord]

It matters because the whole game is potentially being changed to fix something that really isn’t a problem. And people can sense this, which is only going to make them skeptical of real claims

I will say as someone who has anxiety and has had panic attacks that feel like heart attacks (and a real heart attack too) that I have seen people be dismissive of PTSD because they only saw people play acting at having PTSD... it is a valid fear and something that needs to be called out.

the player that almost quit my game over a seriel killer moment did not know it would set him off... I didn’t know (how could I of he didn’t).

there has to be a sane middle ground, but for a game do we really need more then “I don’t want X in the game”?

I mean does something have to get to the level of triggering my anxiety attack?

I mean in day to day life we avoid things for less. My girlfriend doesn’t like talking politics. So when she is with me we either completely avoid it or just do a quick “did you see” followed by “we will talk later”. She won’t get sick. She won’t be scared. She won’t yell or scream or even really be upset... but we have enough other things we CAN talk about WITH her (comics movies our jobs even porn).

 

[Bedrockgames]

Facepalm.

Not everyone at the gaming table has "basic humanity". Safety tools are a way to enforce some absolute bargain bin basement level of "basic humanity" at the table. You're arguing against safety tools, therefore...

And I would say this argument has a seriously flawed premise. I am arguing against the efficacy of safety tools and saying they are causing more damage. I am just as concerned about peoples humanity as you are: where we differ is over whether safety tools protect peoples basic humanity

 

[Bedrockgames]

I mean in day to day life we avoid things for less. My girlfriend doesn’t like talking politics. So when she is with me we either completely avoid it or just do a quick “did you see” followed by “we will talk later”. She won’t get sick. She won’t be scared. She won’t yell or scream or even really be upset... but we have enough other things we CAN talk about WITH her (comics movies our jobs even porn).

When it comes to spouses and immediate family members, we make more compromises, and are expected to make more compromises than with friends, acquaintances and gaming buddies. My wife won't let me watch nature shows on TV (they freak her out). It is not a reasonable imposition on a person to expect them not to watch nature shows, but it is something I am willing to compromise on because I love my wife more than nature programming (but for some people that might be a deal breaker). Like I said before there is no black and white 'right' compromise or solution to these kinds of problems. Gaming groups need to navigate this stuff case by case