Stealing a look at my homebrew adventure notes isn't metagaming, it's cheating. If I were running a module, I'd ask if any of the players had already read it, and I would ask any who hadn't read it not to do so. If they read it and don't tell me, that's lying. Cheating and lying are a problem.
But I don't believe in trying to police player behavior to enforce a line between in-game and out-of-game knowledge. Rather, I consider it my job as DM to ensure that no such line is necessary. If there is information I want kept secret from the characters, it's on me to keep it secret (or at least dangerously unreliable) from the players as well. Players are free to read the Monster Manual* and use information gained thereby; but I homebrew a lot of monsters and tweak stats, and even when I don't, it isn't like I announce a name and a page reference. I describe the monster, in my own words, and the players can try to identify it based on my description. I'd say they guess wrong about 25% of the time.
As DM, the one place I do push back on metagaming is when players try to anticipate the plot, and get it badly wrong in a way that will result in a less-fun experience for all (i.e., they discount an important plot point or head off on a wild goose chase or charge toward certain TPK because they think they know where I'm trying to take them). That's where I tell them "Hey, guys, either quit trying to second-guess me, or get better at it."
As a player, I do try to draw a line between what I know and what my character knows. But that is a decision that I make, for me, for reasons of my own enjoyment. I don't ask or expect other players to do likewise.
*Although actually breaking out the MM to look up a monster in the middle of combat is poor form. Not that I'd get on someone's case about it, it's just... a bit crass, you know?
But I don't believe in trying to police player behavior to enforce a line between in-game and out-of-game knowledge. Rather, I consider it my job as DM to ensure that no such line is necessary. If there is information I want kept secret from the characters, it's on me to keep it secret (or at least dangerously unreliable) from the players as well. Players are free to read the Monster Manual* and use information gained thereby; but I homebrew a lot of monsters and tweak stats, and even when I don't, it isn't like I announce a name and a page reference. I describe the monster, in my own words, and the players can try to identify it based on my description. I'd say they guess wrong about 25% of the time.
As DM, the one place I do push back on metagaming is when players try to anticipate the plot, and get it badly wrong in a way that will result in a less-fun experience for all (i.e., they discount an important plot point or head off on a wild goose chase or charge toward certain TPK because they think they know where I'm trying to take them). That's where I tell them "Hey, guys, either quit trying to second-guess me, or get better at it."
As a player, I do try to draw a line between what I know and what my character knows. But that is a decision that I make, for me, for reasons of my own enjoyment. I don't ask or expect other players to do likewise.
*Although actually breaking out the MM to look up a monster in the middle of combat is poor form. Not that I'd get on someone's case about it, it's just... a bit crass, you know?
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