Archaic and just plain weird insults for roleplaying fun. :)

[Gez]

Archaic (about Renaissance-era) insults in French, that should be weird enough.

Paltoquet, blanc-bec, faquin (insolent dude)
Maraud (brigand, gave marauder in English)
Cuistre (ignorant poseur trying to pass as an erudite by using complicated words without really knowing their meaning)
Bougre (gave bugger in English)

 

[wormwort]

Archaic (about Renaissance-era) insults in French, that should be weird enough.

Cuistre (ignorant poseur trying to pass as an erudite by using complicated words without really knowing their meaning)

That's going to become a favorite of mine!

 

[Impeesa]

I can't find my book of Shakespearean insults.

Thankfully, I have mine right here. Let's take a flip through..

"If though be'st not an ass, I am a youth of fourteen." (All's Well That Ends Well)

"Methink'st thou art a general offence and every man should beat thee." (same)

"In his sleep he does little harm, save to his bedclothes about him." (same again)

I could probably go all night here just on the first play... more later.

--Impeesa--

 

[wormwort]

Shakespeare is the man.

 

[Gez]

That's going to become a favorite of mine!

Pronounciation would be something like "kweestr."

 

[wormwort]

Pronounciation would be something like "kweestr."

Thanks, I was going to ask that.

 

[Umbran]

One of my favorites has been to refer to the offender as a "son of a motherless goat".

 

[The Amazing Dingo]

These aren't all against the BBEG, but they work against the baddies:

"I prefer to beat my opponents the old fashioned way - brutally..."

"I'll snatch your nuts off and use them for dice!"

"If I were going to kill you, I'd be stepping over your body on my way out the door."

"Do you think you're the first who has tried to kill me? You'll have to do better then that."

"Want to kill me? I'd prefer you gave it a real effort and stopped wasting my time."

"Annoyance and stupidity in the same package: how efficient of you."

"I've kicked more arse then you've sat on."

"Wow...look at that...a turnip that grew a face!"

"You're about to go out of this world the same way you went in...crying."

"You're about as dangerous as a drowned kitten."

"It's a shame that (fill in race here) die so easily, else I"d get a sense of satisfaction out of this."

"Would you like to beg for your lives? It sometimes helps, but not often."

"(Put in word that the bad guy has used)...thats a big word. You don't sound half as dumb as you look."

"You're amusing, in a 'what the hell is wrong with you' kind of way."

 

[reciprocalzero]

As long as we're talking about Shakespeare, this comes from King Lear. It may be the one of the most impressive sets of insults I've ever seen in one place...

"What dost thou know me for?"
"A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a
base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited,
hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a
lily-livered, action-taking knave, a whoreson,
glass-gazing, super-serviceable finical rogue;
one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a
bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but
the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition."

 

[Ferret]

Thankfully, I have mine right here. Let's take a flip through..

"If though be'st not an ass, I am a youth of fourteen." (All's Well That Ends Well)

"Methink'st thou art a general offence and every man should beat thee." (same)

"In his sleep he does little harm, save to his bedclothes about him." (same again)

I could probably go all night here just on the first play... more later.

--Impeesa--

Shakespear = teh dude.

I have some from insultmonger, I palce I cannot post but these are friendly enough:

Throw salt in his eyes, pepper in his nose.

She should have stones and not children.

He should grow a wooden tongue.

God should bless him with three people: one should grab him, the second should stab him and the third should hide him.

He should have a large store, and whatever people ask for he shouldn’t have, and what he does have shouldn’t be requested.

He should be transformed into a chandelier, to hang by day and to burn by night.

All his teeth should fall out except one to make him suffer.

As many years as he’s walked on his feet, let him walk on his hands, and for the rest of the time he should crawl along on his ass

His luck should be as bright as a new moon.

God should bestow him with everything his heart desires, but he should be a quadriplegic and not be able to use his tongue.