At my wit's end! Looking for advice on problem players...

[FreeTheSlaves]

That sounds great. Hopefully this is the kick-start needed for both members to develop into great players.

 

[Ogrork the Mighty]

4. Enemy attacks will take a PC down to a maximum of (-9) and his initiative is automatically moved to last.

This house rule caught my eye. So PCs never die? Or does it take an explicit, non-attack methid (e.g. coup de grace)?

 

[Hammerforge]

This statement is symptomatic of his contempt for all other than himself on so many levels:

* xp awards are _awarded_ & noone has any right to make demands
* his inability to realize his disruptive play
* he feels he is able to pressure you to accomodate (chauvinism?)
* the very act of complaining when he is in the wrong

I am sorry to say this but straightening such a player is going to really drain you & for what gain? Psychological therapists earn their bread on people like this guy, is his contribution so great to make him worth fixing for free? My recommendation is to put P4 on notice & ask P5 to take a break for a year.

Or better yet, disband the group and start over again from scratch, this time getting off on the right foot by doing what some others have wisely suggested: laying down ground rules.

I just finished up GMing my first campaign, and I learned enough from it about myself as a GM and also about the kind of players I was involved with that I did two things:

1) I bowed out of GMing and set about forming a new group; and
2) decided on the type of game I wanted to run as well as the rules for the group.

I made my expectations detailed and very clear in my game ads; this way any prospective player knows what he's getting into when he joins my group and can't claim ignorance.

It's important to have ground rules established because it can save you headaches and plus it can be difficult to make major changes to your group's dynamics midway through a campaign. Not only that, but let's face it: it is unrealistic to try to change anyone if they are that big of a problem at the gaming table as your player seems to be. Chances are you're going to succeed only in frustrating yourself and that player you're trying to change.

 

[FreeTheSlaves]

Or better yet, disband the group and start over again from scratch, this time getting off on the right foot by doing what some others have wisely suggested: laying down ground rules.

Yeah, when things go so wrong this is often a good idea. There is a temptation for inexperienced dms & players to just want to 'hurry up & play', which is an admirable level of enthusiasm, which more experienced dm & players try to recapture, but I digress. Getting the game, campaigns especially, off on the right foot is essential for them to last the grand lengths of 1 to 3 years; I cancelled earlier this year a 4 month campaign because not all players were on the same wave-length as to my expectations.

The way Ellie has handled it, & my experience, suggests that you don't always need to disband the group but just the campaign; or just a character.

 

[FreeTheSlaves]

This house rule caught my eye. So PCs never die? Or does it take an explicit, non-attack methid (e.g. coup de grace)?

I would think that it is symptomatic of the mid-level + frustrations where a combination of save-or-die & sudden huge wallops of damage start getting dished out. The stated reaction read literally still retains the threat of death but never suddenly & not without a chance of staving it off. Perhaps this is a game with serious dm/player investment in character plot &/or raise dead magic is somehow more limited?

 

[S'mon]

Small update on the whole situation...

I saw p4 tonight and we spent some time talking about the loudness etc. It turns out one of my other players had a chat with him about how it might be viewed by other members of the group etc. I think once we get all get used to each other's playing styles we'll be fine there.

I've had one email from p5 dropping out of the game in response to the email I sent him which I posted earlier in the thread, and he's also posted on our group message board, very contrite, asking to make a new character and promising to make one that will fit in the group better- both came in the past few hours as I was on the pc before going out for the evening, but I'm trying to figure out which message came first at the moment, as the clock on our messageboard is screwy....But either way I have lost my psycho psion

Ellie.

Hi Ellie - I would strongly advise treating the "I'm dropping out" email as the "real" one, and email him back saying best of luck in his future gaming & GOODBYE.

 

[the Jester]

Hi Ellie - I would strongly advise treating the "I'm dropping out" email as the "real" one, and email him back saying best of luck in his future gaming & GOODBYE.

I disagree- I would give him a chance if he's truly contrite, but make it clear to him that he is being GIVEN a chance, not OWED a chance. Make sure he understands that he must behave appropriately (i.e. no freaking out when he's called on his crap) if he wants to play in your group.

But then, I am kind and benevolent.

 

[BigTom]

Small update on the whole situation...

I saw p4 tonight and we spent some time talking about the loudness etc. It turns out one of my other players had a chat with him about how it might be viewed by other members of the group etc. I think once we get all get used to each other's playing styles we'll be fine there.

I've had one email from p5 dropping out of the game in response to the email I sent him which I posted earlier in the thread, and he's also posted on our group message board, very contrite, asking to make a new character and promising to make one that will fit in the group better- both came in the past few hours as I was on the pc before going out for the evening, but I'm trying to figure out which message came first at the moment, as the clock on our messageboard is screwy....But either way I have lost my psycho psion

Ellie.

One piece of advice, save that email, you may need proof later.

There are two possible chain of evens here, and which is is will determine if you need that email.

1) He sent the email first. In this case, it is likely he sent the email in anger, then realized he wouldn't get to play with his friends, repented to some extent, and sent the post to the board. In this case, you have to absolutely hold him to his promises on the board but you may have gotten through to him at least temporarily.

2) He sent the email second. In this case you may need the email later because he may be trying to play you against the group. The scenario he may be hoping for is that you react to the email about him leaving, then you look like the bad guy when he was obviously so contrite to the group. Someone immature and spiteful, who can't handle criticism, might just try a tactic like this.

I don't know which it is, but keep that email in case you need to prove to the group what happened.

And if it is case one, try to work with him to better interact with the group, this could be a breakthrough for his social development.