D&D General Being A Better DM

Stormonu

NeoGrognard
I've been at this gig of running games for D&D (and other systems) for about 40 years now. Over the years, I have received numerous compliments for the games I have run, and have even been lucky enough to have an adventure of my own creation professionally published. I'm the sort of person who prefers to DM much more than I enjoy sitting in on a game as a player.

Recently, one of my players asked for tips on the D&D game as he was about to venture into the world of DMing for himself for the first time. It's hard to condense those many years into a single text message that isn't a wall of do's and don'ts. I had to really think of what were the two to three most important things to keep in mind.

Because, God I've done a lot wrong over the years. But both those mistakes I made, and those decisions I made that worked helped make me a better DM as well - as long as I paid attention.

Since I couldn't go into detail over a single text message, and because I've had more time to mull over it, I'd like to discuss it here.

First of all, I want to say - You will make mistakes. Everyone does it, even the veterans. Don't dwell on those mistakes. Learn from them, and keep moving forward.

I think the most important thing to keep in mind is keep the game moving. You can look a rule up later or worry about physics later. Nothing brings a game session to a crashing, bleeding halt as stopping a game to haul out the rulebook (or module) and spending the next twenty minutes looking something up. The worst thing a DM can ever say to his players is "I don't know" - it erodes confidence in the players that the DM knows what they're doing. If you don't know, make it up. There will be incomplete information, and you will have to use your imagination and common sense to fill in the gaps. Experienced players can be a source to fill in gaps - and if you're unsure about a rule, sometimes the best thing to do is to ask the player who is affected by the action to look the rule up while you handle other things going on in the game. (This has been a sore point for me recently - another DM in a game I am playing in is guilty of this, and it just makes me sad for the other players and uninterested in the game overall).

Secondly, learn your players. This is huge - every group is different and knowing your audience will greatly affect your game. Make a note of both what catches your player's attention in the game and where they lose focus and start making dice towers. Every player will crave something different from a game, and the trick to good DMing is find what keeps folks coming back to the table and give them carefully measured doses of that material to keep them coming back. Yes, moderate doses. Give too much, and you risk burning that player out or losing other player's interest. Give too little, and they'll become frustrated - at worst, to the point they start attempting to actively ruin other folks (including yours) enjoyment. Some DMs I've played with will openly ask what their players want, even going so far as to ask for a list of magic items they hope their players will find. Personally, I don't do this - I feel like I have enough ability to "read" players and/or take notes of off-hand comments to weave in what my players want, but not everyone can do this and even I get it wrong sometimes. I will say, when you get it right, you're "brilliant", so it's something I would shoot for to train yourself to do. You can't always rely on the players actually knowing or being truthful to themselves about what they want/don't want in a game. Avoid asking players "how did I do?" at games end, as most of the time you're putting players on the spot and you're more likely to get answers you want to hear than the actual truth. If you want to really find out what they thought, pick something that happened in the game and make a comment and note how your players respond. Likewise, have players do a quick recap at the start of the next session - you'll quickly learn what information and activities your players latched on to from the last game, and can use that information to drive your future games.

Thirdly, learn the rules. Yes, that does somewhat counter the point about keeping the game moving. Sure, some of the better DMs know when to kick to the rules to the curb, but the best DMs (IMHO) at least know the rules. Most RPGs are too in-depth to memorize every rule, but you want to try to familiarize yourself with enough concepts and procedures that when the game session starts, you aren't stuttering and gaping when a player tries some basic action or you aren't spending the next thirty minutes rereading a section of rules while everyone else takes a break. Some DMs can wing things without the prep, but you're not one of them.

Take some time to review the rules and any adventure notes for what's coming up in the next session or two. If at all possible, keep two adventures/encounters/scenes in mind or at hand for a session. If the party does something unusual (and trust me, at some point they WILL), you can use these items to keep the players busy until you can recover or plot out what needs to come next.

Lastly, take some time to sit on the player's side of the screen. Nothing will give you an appreciation of the wants and tribulations of your players as sitting in on a game as a player from time to time. The DM has a lot of balls to juggle as well as a different vantage point about the game overall than the players do. It helps to let go of some that responsibility and be reminded of those things that players want from their game. Likewise, seeing the style of other DMs - and how they handle various scenarios - can be very enlightening to how to improve (or what to avoid) in your own games.


Also, some helpful hints of lesser importance, and are just for style. As the DM, you are everyone and everything in the game world, and your players ability to immerse themselves in this alternate reality often stems for the DMs own ability to pass along that immersiveness.

- If you use special voices or acting out for NPCs, don't go overboard - but try to be consistent. Most of all, know or learn your limits. For example, I can't do women's voices - my own is just too deep and it sounds creepy if I try.

- Do NOT use DM PCs. There is nothing wrong with having NPCs encounter or aid players in their adventures, but until you get a hang of the game and your group, DON'T run them as your personal PC - and most especially, never treat them as more than disposable (i.e., "You can't kill/betray/leave him!"). Hand that sheet over to the players and let them run the NPC, only intervening if you're aware of some ability they have that the players have accidentally overlooked. If you can't do that, its time to remove that NPC. (I've seen too many games ruined or degraded - including some of my own - with powerful or forceful NPCs who overshadow players. Most players I know resent being regulated to being someone else's flunky or enduring the DM's pet NPC getting all the limelight. I've actually killed a DM NPC who overly annoyed me - and the rest of party gladly helped. The DM, though, was miffed - until we explained why. Then he was just angry and brought in an unkillable replacement. I don't play with that DM anymore).

- NEVER let an NPC come up with the solution to the group's problem - let the players solve their own problems and move the story forward with their own decisions and abilities. That doesn't mean an NPC can't help, be a source of information or quietly suggest a solution (and should be 50%+ wrong when doing so...), but they should take back seat to letting the players handle things their own way. Likewise, use NPCs who intend to betray the party sparingly. Every time you introduce an NPC who is deceiving the party in some way, you are eroding the trust between yourself and your players, most especially in their willingness to use/consult/interact with NPCs - who may just turn on them.

- If you read boxed text descriptions, develop a natural speaking voice. This may require you to summarize or practice pre-reading the text. It can be jarring to players if your tone when reading these texts is either flat, monologueish or is far more detailed than your own general take of a place or action. Badly done, it's like those cut scenes in games where you can visibly tell the difference from regular play and the rendered cut-scenes.

- Don't forget the five senses. One thing that constantly gets me into trouble when I'm attempting to immerse my players is how things smell. When and if you can, don't just give the architectural plan drawing details ("This room is 30 feet by 40 feet, with a door in the north and the south"), but take a moment to add some details ("The oak door creaks slightly as you torchlight creeps into the room beyond. There is a dry, musty smell coming from the mortared joints of the stone room beyond. It's big enough your torchlight can't illuminate the far side of the room, but in the shadowy light beyond, you can faintly make out another oak door on the far side of the room, with a large black pull handle that seems to glisten as if wet."). It is a learned talent to learn not to go overboard and know when the inside of a tavern is just "a tavern", but when you have a moment, take a consious effort and stretch out a description a bit. Do your best to make a note of player's reactions when you expand your description to help figure out how much is enough for your group.

- Miniatures are nice, descriptions are better. Don't just plop some mini on the table and say "This is a gnoll". Take a moment or two to give a description of what it is - and what its doing. If you can't, don't call it by its proper name for as long as you can. Players tend to react more conservatively if they are unsure about the quality or nature of what they're facing.

- Player handouts make up for a lot. Nothing tends to bring out the "ooohs" and "aaahs" as handing a player an interactive artifact from the game - whether a note, a strange amulet or even a picture of an NPC, room or vista.

Go ahead and add your own experiences. And if you have your own questions, ask them here. One way or another, we'll get answers.
 

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Looks like good advice, especially for someone just starting out as a GM. I'd add that playing other games is a good thing--it shows you different ways of handling things in the rules, if nothing else. You don't have to incorporate That Other Game into, say, the D&D game you're running, but there might be something that connects for you.

Also, if you've played in games you didn't like, use those as negative examples--but be careful about going too far the other way. Most errors in GMing have an equal and opposite error, IME.
 


Great write-up! I will share this with one of our players who is running CoS as his first DMing experience.

Along with knowing the rules, I would add a point about knowing the opponents. A couple times in CoS this novice DM overlooked key abilities for some opponents, which allowed us to defeat them much more easily than we should have. In the same spirit, I would add run the opposition at a level of intelligence they have (and do your best when the monsters are smarter than you!). Foes will use every power at their disposal not just to win, but to survive! Most creatures should not fight to the death unless they feel there is no alternative (surrender, escape, bribing the party, etc.).
 

Good post, I'll throw in some of my own things for starting a new game and my session 0 suggestions and some related DMing advice.

Do you allow evil?
Decide whether or not you want to allow evil characters. Some people enjoy playing and DMing for them, but I don't so I don't allow them. I also know that one of my players (my lovely wife) will always want to play a good character and it's not fair to her to force her character to play with someone her character would never associate with. If you can't decide have a secret vote. If even one person doesn't want to allow evil characters, don't allow them. I keep hearing about these amazing groups that were all evil, but I've never seen it work. Your mileage may vary.

Don't be a jerk.
Never assume that someone isn't going to bring a narcissistic, chaotic character who's only goal seems to be causing disruption in the group. If you want to be a griefer, play a video game. Along these lines, I simply don't allow PVP theft, murder or other shenanigans (unless someone is being controlled). I've seen hurt feelings between players (not just their characters) because the party rogue decides they're a kleptomaniac. Just say no.

It's all about relationships.
Everyone in the party should know at least one other person in the party. They don't have to all know each other, but usually they should know at least one other person even if only as a distant cousin or someone they know by reputation. I have occasionally thrown people together by having them being raw recruits in a nation about to be invaded but I'm more likely to have a couple of sessions of them as children.

Why are you an adventurer?
Every PC should have an answer for this. Gold? Glory? The greater good? Because you ran away and you need to do something to survive?

Set the scene.
As a DM, you need to give your players a broad overall picture of the type of campaign you're envisioning. Don't write a novella on your background (or if you do, don't make it required reading) but give them a rough idea. "It's a time of war, when orcs threaten to destroy your peaceful kingdom..." is enough. It should be a paragraph or two at most. I give information I think the commoner on the street would know, which often isn't much.

Listen to your players.
I'm not talking about just listening to feedback when you explicitly ask for it, but also pay attention when they chat among each other. I've gotten some of my best ideas from players when they say things and think I'm not paying attention.

Have fun, and don't sweat the small stuff
Different groups game for different reasons. For some it's just an opportunity to roll some dice while eating junk food and talking about their daily lives. For others it's about building a deep fantasy world where when you are at the table you are Torg the Barbarian who has never heard of this "football game" of which you speak. Let the group guide you as much as you guide them and try to find a balance.

Just remember that nobody is a perfect DM. If people are engaged and having fun you are doing it right. Good luck!
 

Additional suggestions for DMs:

Read the damn DMG. Try and understand the sort of game it's telling you to run. Then do that. If the result is good, great. If it's not, make adjustments or consider other games.

Related to this, don't run the game as if it's some other game. Veteran DMs are guilty of this a lot in my experience. No matter what version of D&D, they run it largely the same way and it shows. There are subtle differences in the rules that make for large differences in the play experience.
 

I always found that not arguing to where people get up and walk out is needed. 30 years ago I used to press the DM on things as a player where I thought the rules favored one way and he thought the other. Nobody ever walked out, but if we were playing in a store with strangers, we may have. There needs to be a point that cuts things off and the DM can have final say.
 

Say Hell NO when necessary. This could mean some one went R rated when not necessary. Aka know what you are comfortable with as DM.
Say Enough. AKA people that joke is gotten old and is now just sand in the gears.
PCs are the TV Show Stars (ain't going to kill them) or Rock Stars (It is hard party life then you die!)
 

- Do NOT use DM PCs. There is nothing wrong with having NPCs encounter or aid players in their adventures, but until you get a hang of the game and your group, DON'T run them as your personal PC - and most especially, never treat them as more than disposable (i.e., "You can't kill/betray/leave him!"). Hand that sheet over to the players and let them run the NPC, only intervening if you're aware of some ability they have that the players have accidentally overlooked. If you can't do that, its time to remove that NPC. (I've seen too many games ruined or degraded - including some of my own - with powerful or forceful NPCs who overshadow players. Most players I know resent being regulated to being someone else's flunky or enduring the DM's pet NPC getting all the limelight. I've actually killed a DM NPC who overly annoyed me - and the rest of party gladly helped. The DM, though, was miffed - until we explained why. Then he was just angry and brought in an unkillable replacement. I don't play with that DM anymore).
The problem there is not the mere existence of the DMPC (we just call these NPCs) but that the DM made that character more important and-or powerful than the PC party members.

NPC adventurers who are just another member of the party are, in general, fine; as long as they have equal odds of dying or meeting other foul fates as do the PCs. Rare is the party in our crew that doesn't have at least one or two of these, usually recruited to fill a gap at some point and then kept around because they just became part of the team.

- NEVER let an NPC come up with the solution to the group's problem - let the players solve their own problems and move the story forward with their own decisions and abilities. That doesn't mean an NPC can't help, be a source of information or quietly suggest a solution (and should be 50%+ wrong when doing so...), but they should take back seat to letting the players handle things their own way.
Agreed. I'll often do some quiet dice-rolling if I'm not sure how an NPC would act or vote or proceed; sometimes the NPC does-says-suggests the right thing, other times not.

Likewise, use NPCs who intend to betray the party sparingly. Every time you introduce an NPC who is deceiving the party in some way, you are eroding the trust between yourself and your players, most especially in their willingness to use/consult/interact with NPCs - who may just turn on them.
I agree they should be used sparingly, as if you do it all the time it gets old pretty fast.

But I'm not concerned about eroding trust. A truly wise player-as-PC doesn't trust much in the game world anyway (the game world is out to kill you, after all! :) ), even while trusting the DM to run an entertaining and engaging game.

- If you read boxed text descriptions, develop a natural speaking voice. This may require you to summarize or practice pre-reading the text. It can be jarring to players if your tone when reading these texts is either flat, monologueish or is far more detailed than your own general take of a place or action. Badly done, it's like those cut scenes in games where you can visibly tell the difference from regular play and the rendered cut-scenes.
We just make a joke of this; when the party get to where the boxed descriptions start I'll say something like "Ah! Boxed-description time at last!" because they're immediately going to be able to tell the difference anyway even if only due to the fact I'm looking at a piece of paper rather than at them while speaking.

- Miniatures are nice, descriptions are better. Don't just plop some mini on the table and say "This is a gnoll". Take a moment or two to give a description of what it is - and what its doing. If you can't, don't call it by its proper name for as long as you can. Players tend to react more conservatively if they are unsure about the quality or nature of what they're facing.
A step further is to outright rename some common monsters while keeping their mechanics more or less intact.

Orcs in my current game are called Grashi (Grash singular) for example, and when I started the campaign this made even some very long-term players sit up and take note: "What's a Grash?", and I had to describe them in some detail. Had I called them Orcs it'd have been "Oh, ho hum, we know all about those".
 

The problem there is not the mere existence of the DMPC (we just call these NPCs) but that the DM made that character more important and-or powerful than the PC party members.
If you have a long term NPC in the party, it's perfectly fine for them to start out a bit more powerful than the PCs. Over time, the PCs will quickly outshine the NPC, but they'll remain relevant for quite a while.

Interestingly, I have an NPC in the party that regularly steals the spotlight. He's the former love interest of one of the PCs, and he's along to "keep her safe" (despite the fact that she's a knight paladin). The rest of the party is slowly coming to the realization that he's up to a lot more than keeping up with an old flame.

We just make a joke of this; when the party get to where the boxed descriptions start I'll say something like "Ah! Boxed-description time at last!" because they're immediately going to be able to tell the difference anyway even if only due to the fact I'm looking at a piece of paper rather than at them while speaking.
My group refers to these as cut scenes.
 

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