Best way to subtlely remind the inlaws of my name?

[Kahuna Burger]

So, I'm married to Clashmore Dave, he of very rare posting here. After some discussion, neither of us changed our name upon marriage. When the Kahuna Meatball was born, we decided (again after some discussion and saying things out loud a lot) on a hyphenated last name in the order we liked. We tend to refer to our household collectively with the hyphenated name as well. So far this has caused no complications with pediatricians, work, billing, etc. However my inlaws are traditional as a group, and on my birthday I am lucky to get a single card that has my correct name on it. (most use his last name and some the hyphenated)

Don't get me wrong, I feel lucky to have an extended inlaw family that sends me birthday cards (at this point it's fair to say that I have more of a relationship with my husband's aunts and uncles than I do with my own) and I have no wish to make any of them feel bad or unwelcome in any way. I'm even willing to accept that older members of the family will call me "Mrs Clashmore Dave" and that's just a generational thing. But it would be nice to give them all a reminder without it looking like a scold. We use the dual name as a return address (labels with all three of our names seem like they would be a bit crowded) and I don't have any real reason to send cards or letters just from myself to all my inlaws. I've missed my chance at birth announcements that would have given an excuse for a full formal listing of names, so I was wondering if anyone here had any suggestions.

 

[Relique du Madde]

One of those fancy scrolled wooden signs that you hand over the door that saids "Cashmore Dave-Kahuna Burgers*" that and state it on your voice mail/answering machines messages.



* or "Kahuna Burger-Cashmore Daves"

 

[Tewligan]

Get a brand and burn your name on their wrinkled old foreheads. You'll remember it NOW, granny!

 

[freyar]

Hmm, I would have said the return address, but I guess that doesn't work. Maybe Mr. Dave could remind them gently?

Incidentally, my wife and I have the same problem. After 7 years, we finally have pretty much all of my family figured out, but one of her aunts just refuses to use her correct name. Anyway, I'll be happy to hear if you figure something out!

 

[Joker]

Get a brand and burn your name on their wrinkled old foreheads. You'll remember it NOW, granny!

Don't forget to mirror the text.

 

[Kahuna Burger]

One of those fancy scrolled wooden signs that you hand over the door that saids "Cashmore Dave-Kahuna Burgers*"

Funny you should say.... This thread was triggered by a very nice christmas present we got from one of his aunts. An attractive slate sign and stand to put beside out walk welcoming everyone to "The Clashmores".... :\ It's quite nice and a style I like, but I have no idea what to do with it.

But thanks for the suggestions, I need to change my answering machine anyway now that I'm no longer doing pet sitting, so I can make the "you have reached" part a little longer....

 

[Kahuna Burger]

Hmm, I would have said the return address, but I guess that doesn't work. Maybe Mr. Dave could remind them gently?

Incidentally, my wife and I have the same problem. After 7 years, we finally have pretty much all of my family figured out, but one of her aunts just refuses to use her correct name. Anyway, I'll be happy to hear if you figure something out!

7 years? doh! Do you think the one aunt knows but is just passively indicating her opinion that her name should be different? At this point in my situation I'm pretty sure it's all sincere misunderstanding from my inlaws, but it would be an even weirder situation if some of them knew but kept using the wrong name.

 

[freyar]

7 years? doh! Do you think the one aunt knows but is just passively indicating her opinion that her name should be different? At this point in my situation I'm pretty sure it's all sincere misunderstanding from my inlaws, but it would be an even weirder situation if some of them knew but kept using the wrong name.

Well, since we can't talk about politics or religion, I can't get into the reasons, but, yeah, we're pretty sure that this aunt is trying to impose her views on us. :\ Fortunately, it doesn't come up more than a few times a year.

 

[Witz]

Happy New Year!

Quick question on this - did you both legally change your names (him - Jones; you - Smith) to Jones-Smith, or is he still legally Jones and you legally Smith (and you just want to be called Jones-Smith)?

 

[dogoftheunderworld]

. . . I don't have any real reason to send cards or letters just from myself to all my inlaws. . .

Thank you notes