Books you DON'T want to see WotC publish

[Imp]

Complete Realtor

The Economicon: A Guide to Making Your Fantasy World Reflect Current Economic Thought

The Chimponomicon: Explore the World of Great Apes With New Spells, Sidekicks, and Prestige Classes

The Excretion Handbook: The Bathroom Habits of Dungeon Denizens And How You Can Integrate Them Into Your Campaign

Complete NPC: Dozens of Prestige NPC Classes and NPC-only Feats
-----page 25: Doughty Farmer
-----page 37: Street-Scuttlin' Urchin
-----page 39: Slovenly Trull
-----page 42: Wanton Wench

Dungeon Master's Style Guide: Baseline Rules to Make Sure Your Crappy Homebrew Is Valid
-----Chapter 1: Drow

The Ordinary Item Compendium
-----page 12: Barrels

 

[pawsplay]

The Manual of Gainful Exercise
Ioun Stone Compendium
Races of Obscure AD&D Modules
The Complete Lunatic
Liber Lieber
Ninjas & Superspies
Living Greyhawk for Dummies
Miniatures Handbook 2: Battles of the Last War
Weapons of Legacy Part 6
Player's Handbook V
Player's Folio
Savage Dungeon Masters
Flindonomicon

 

[Bacris]

Pun Pun and Friends: A Coloring Book

I would totally buy that.

I second not wanting to see Complete Psionic 2 or anything similar If it was Secrets of Sarlona quality, sure, but CPsi quality, no thanks.

I'd also rather not see Tome of Bureacracy: Book of Useless Local Laws.

 

[ephemeron]

Expedition to the Back of the Refrigerator
Complete Waste of Time
Complete Waste of Money (aka "Complete Waste of Time II")
Champions of Avarice (aka "Complete Waste of Money II")
Eberron of Faerun of Greyhawk

 

[Bad Paper]

Complete Realtor

Player's Handbook 3.8
Dungeon Master's Guide 3.8
Monster Manual 3.8
a PDF describing how to upgrade everything from 3.5 to 3.8, including handling the new DR/driver, DR/sand wedge, and DR/putter
Monster Manual VIII: More Drow with Statblocks
Masterwork Item Compendium
Expedition to Keep on the Borderlands
Complete Tarrasque

 

[TarionzCousin]

Liber Lieber

The Book of Love?

 

[Arkhandus]

Complete Fire Monkey (bonus points if you get the reference!)
Draconic Dragon Magic of Dragonny Dragons: And Kobolds Too!
Complete Drizzt
Expedition To The Lost Demonweb Blackmoor Peaks On The Borderlands Of Elminster's Extradimensional Left Nostril Castle Ravenloft
Complete Half-Fiendish Dragonblooded Poodle Of Legend
Expanded Frenzied Berserker Handbook
Complete Spoon
Monster Manual MCXIV: Return Of The Dragonspawn!
Steamgothuludungeonmechanimevictorianelfrpronpunk

 

[Celebrim]

It's amazing how many of these jokes that I'd more likely buy than what WotC actually does put out.

Cantrip Compendium? I'm there. Cantrip collections are like crack to me.

Complete NPC? Complete Commoner? 500 seven sentence ordinary NPC's with stats for any campaign? I'd buy that in a heartbeat!

The Complete Lunatic? Awesome!! Complete rules for insanity and madness? A discussion of bizarre cults and a detailed look at Limbo! Alright!!

Economicon? If I could, I'd write it myself. A truly historical and consistant comprehensive price list? Craft rules that actually worked? Comprehensive rules for the profession skill? Quick medium to large scale business resolution? Yeah, if someone did that right, and I mean right, I'd bust my piggy bank and preorder the sucker.

I'd be more interested in that than a book of fiends I'll never use, monster manuals containing maybe 10 pages of usable material, minatures crap, forgotten realms crap, eberron stuff which isn't crap but which just doesn't appeal to me, the epic handbook, the book of vile darkness, the book of exalted deeds, complete this and that with a smattering of feats a spell or two and a bunch of prestige classes I'll never use, dragon magic, dragonomicon, dragons of faerun, dragons of eberron, dragons of lower lincolnshire, races of this, races of that, and well most everything that WotC publishes.

I tell you what I don't want to see WotC waste their time on:

Anarauch - Another Spot in my Childhood Slapdash Campaign World Before I Knew Anything about World Building
Rules Compendium - Everything in the SRD in Hardback
Confessions of a Part Time Sorceress, or "Who knew geeks could be sexy"?
Monster Manual V - Scrapping the Bottom of the Barrel
Undermountain - Save Time, I've Already Rolled Up a Random Dungeon
The More than Complete Book of Drow II
Fiendish Codex VII - More monsters for people who read books but don't run campaigns

 

[Celebrim]

Player's Handbook 3.8
Dungeon Master's Guide 3.8
Monster Manual 3.8
a PDF describing how to upgrade everything from 3.5 to 3.8, including the handling the new DR/driver, DR/sand wedge, and DR/putter
Monster Manual VIII: More Drow with Statblocks
Masterwork Item Compendium
Expedition to Keep on the Borderlands
Complete Tarrasque

So, I see I'm not the only one that snuck a peek at WotC's up coming line.

 

[hong]

The Excretion Handbook: The Bathroom Habits of Dungeon Denizens And How You Can Integrate Them Into Your Campaign

Useless. Everyone knows fantasy buildings don't have toilets.