Consent in Gaming - Free Guidebook

[MNblockhead]

In the example with your friend. If the entire adventure revolved around this cult, should the DM have changed it on the fly? I don't know the adventure in question or how that particular gruesome practice of the cultists may have played in the story. Perhaps the DM could have just changed it to they are capturing women. Perhaps your friend would have been fine with just that they were capturing pregnant women but not with having the rituals described in gory detail. I think that an adventure like this should come with some warnings in the registration text.

I truly believe that DMs and other players should be sensitive, empathetic, and accommodating. But can you draw a line? At some point, can the group simply say, sorry, but this is what we all game to enjoy. Sorry it bothers you, but nobody is forcing you to play. The issue I have with books like this is that it makes black and white rules that entirely support the person with the objection.

I'm in my 40s, and I've played a lot of stuff that could be deemed "mature" content. Now granted, that was mostly when I was a teenaged edge-lord, but I didn't give a lot of thought about comfort level.
I have a transgender player at my table. I don't think about her as a different player. But while we were playing a dungeon that had that classic curse trap of gender swapping, I took pause. I didn't want to make it a joke. I came up with a different cosmetic change trap.
But I never thought there would be something that would offend me. I'm pretty lax and have a bawdy sense of humor.
Then I played a con game revolving around investigating a cult that kidnapped pregnant women for the sole purpose of killing them and letting their fetuses die in womb. I was sitting next to my best friend, whose wife just had a miscarriage. It was awkward, insensitive (especially for the GM to continue after we asked him to stop), and it cast a dark tone over the rest of the con.
So yeah, a year ago I might've laughed over the idea of this kind of book. Now, I can see its purpose.

 

[Bawylie]

From time to time, when I don’t enjoy the type of activity I’m doing or the content I’m consuming, I stop doing that activity or consuming that content.

I change the channel. I put the book down. I leave the movie theatre. I excuse myself from the party or the conversation or whatever.

Consent and voluntaryism are vital. Therefore, as a person who is responsible for himself, I have agency and exercise it. When I am no longer willing to volunteer or to consent, then my involvement is over and it’s time for me to go.

I sincerely hope some document like this (or, preferably, some conversation between consenting parties) serves to establish a working agreement that empowers the participants. And where that agreement is violated, by whomever and for whatever reason, I sincerely hope participants remember their agency, and excuse themselves.

 

[5ekyu]

In the example with your friend. If the entire adventure revolved around this cult, should the DM have changed it on the fly? I don't know the adventure in question or how that particular gruesome practice of the cultists may have played in the story. Perhaps the DM could have just changed it to they are capturing women. Perhaps your friend would have been fine with just that they were capturing pregnant women but not with having the rituals described in gory detail. I think that an adventure like this should come with some warnings in the registration text.

I truly believe that DMs and other players should be sensitive, empathetic, and accommodating. But can you draw a line? At some point, can the group simply say, sorry, but this is what we all game to enjoy. Sorry it bothers you, but nobody is forcing you to play. The issue I have with books like this is that it makes black and white rules that entirely support the person with the objection.

The key, I think, with this book perhaps but others is YES a group can choose to use a given content and a player could choose to not be involved but those decisions should be made well before play into that content.

These choices cannot be made pre-conflict without communication and that us what these tools provide - a guideline for working out these things before they occur and to deal smoothly with them if we reach one unexpected in play.

As a GM, when I run games at FLGS I restrict my content to whatever would be ok for young teens to overhear. So, no, no fetus-womb cults or really any sexual content, likely no drug use either.

As a GM, running in my own home with players I know, different standards. Sometimes "what this game will feature" does mean I dont invite some people.

But that is not restricted to sensitive content. I once told a player I would not include him in the next campaign (Srargate SG-1) because that setting featured "captured PC" content and he hated those. He joined us the next time we shifted.

The group list for when I ran VtM and DnD were different.

I think n my experience any group with long legs has to get to know that different subsets playing fdifferent things is normal and manageable so that it's not " pressure to play" or "excluding" but more like a buffet - you pick what tog content you want to consume.

 

[Zardnaar]

I don't think I've ever run a pregnant women baby sacrifice cult.

I would look at a DM wanting to run that a little bit sideways.

 

[Bawylie]

I don't think I've ever run a pregnant women baby sacrifice cult.

I would look at a DM wanting to run that a little bit sideways.

Skynet - The Terminator.

 

[Retreater]

In the example with your friend. If the entire adventure revolved around this cult, should the DM have changed it on the fly? I don't know the adventure in question or how that particular gruesome practice of the cultists may have played in the story. Perhaps the DM could have just changed it to they are capturing women. Perhaps your friend would have been fine with just that they were capturing pregnant women but not with having the rituals described in gory detail. I think that an adventure like this should come with some warnings in the registration text.

I truly believe that DMs and other players should be sensitive, empathetic, and accommodating. But can you draw a line? At some point, can the group simply say, sorry, but this is what we all game to enjoy. Sorry it bothers you, but nobody is forcing you to play. The issue I have with books like this is that it makes black and white rules that entirely support the person with the objection.

Yes. There was no warning of the content, and the event was listed as appropriate for 13+ and with a system and setting not known for this kind of stuff (Star Wars). I mean, we could've just left the game and probably should have.

 

[Zardnaar]

Skynet - The Terminator.

Which has an R rating and the baby survives.

There was a 3E Dungeon adventure with a pregnant women love child of Tharizdun vibe

 

[Bawylie]

Which has an R rating and the baby survives.

Yeah, my point was there’s a way to do it that doesn’t have to catch side-eye.

Ps - I’m not saying that anyone can or should look for ways to get around agreements or limits. I am saying that execution can and does matter.

 

[Krug]

If you don't want to give your info over at Monte Cook Games you can download it from Drive Thru RPG.
Link: Consent in Gaming - Monte Cook Games | Numenera | The Strange | Cypher System | No Thank You, Evil! | Free Products | Invisible Sun | Your Best Game Ever | DriveThruRPG.com

 

[Nagol]

I don't think I've ever run a pregnant women baby sacrifice cult.

I would look at a DM wanting to run that a little bit sideways.

I did something like it once. It was an Aftermath game loosely based on the comic adaptation of the War of the Worlds. The players were sold the campaign idea of PCs working toward the overthrow of the aliens.

An early session had the PCs working for an alien overlord and being sent on a collection/retrieval mission to collect culinary delicacies. I fully expected the PCs to see the targets and rebel. I didn't expect them to dutifully complete the mission. I casually asked what they were thinking in an after session debrief and found the players were afraid of the alien master, hesitant to start something without a plan, and hadn't found a good base for further operations yet.