Chocolate Golem Working Draft
NOTE: This Working Draft is a restoration of one that was lost when the Enworld Database went down in Sept 2016.
Golem, Chocolate
Large Construct
Hit Dice: 6d10+30 (63 hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares)
Armor Class: 10 (–1 size, +1 natural), touch 9, flat-footed 10
Base Attack/Grapple: +4/+11
Attack: Slam +6 melee (1d4+3) or spew filling +3 touch (special)
Full Attack: 2 slams +6 melee (1d4+3) or spew filling +3 touch (special)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Scalding chocolate, spew filling
Special Qualities: Cold hardening, construct traits, darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, susceptibility to heat
Saves: Fort +2, Ref +2, Will -3
Abilities: Str 16, Dex 10, Con —, Int —, Wis 1, Cha 1
Skills: —
Feats: —
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 3
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 7-9 HD (Large); 10-12 HD (Huge)
Level Adjustment: —
A figure larger and far bulkier than a human. It appears to have been molded out of a smooth glossy brown material, and its features are outlined with what looks very much like sugar frosting.
These constructs are simply what their name indicates – golems made out of edible chocolate. Chocolate golems are normally made from milk chocolate, but they can be made of dark or white chocolate or even multiple separate types of chocolate. They are sometimes used as guard for parties thrown by the extravagantly wealthy, but are more novelty than a practical form of security. A chocolate golem "security guard" may even be ordered to allow guests to break off and eat portions of its body.
Most chocolate golems are shaped like bulky humanoids but they can be molded into the form of almost any creature. Popular alternative shapes include reindeer, bipedal rabbits and ducks. An average chocolate golem is 7 feet tall and weighs 500 pounds.
Combat
Chocolate golems can follow only rudimentary instructions, attacking according to their creator's commands. They are usually ordered to spew their filling at obvious spellcasters first in an attempt to blind them, thereby thwarting spells that rely on line of sight. They will normally be ordered to spew filling at other combatants too, with slow melee opponents typically having lower priority than fast ranged ones.
Cold Hardening (Ex): Any time a chocolate golem is hit by a Cold-based spells the golem gains a +2 natural armor bonus (making them AC 12) for 1d4 rounds. Cumulative cold-based spells have no additional effect.
Scalding Chocolate (Ex): Any time a chocolate golem is hit by a spell that does fire damage it splashes superheated molten chocolate in a 15 ft. radius. This hot chocolate does 1d4 fire damage.
Spew Filling (Ex): A chocolate golem can spit out streams of sweet, sticky filling from its hollow interior. If the golem succeeds in a ranged touch attack (30 ft. range, no range increments) its target is coated in the sticky goo and blinded for 1d4 rounds. The target can end this blindness by spending a full round action to remove the syrupy filling from their eyes. The chocolate golem's hollow interior can hold enough filling for 12 shots, each shot corresponds to a gallon of filling for a standard-sized chocolate golem. A chocolate golem will typically have 1d6+6 shots of filling available when encountered. It is possible to "reload" a chocolate golem's filling with patience and a funnel.
Susceptibility To Heat (Ex): Chocolate golems melt in hot environments. The golem takes 1d3 fire damage every 10 minutes (no save) in "very hot" conditions with a temperature higher than 90° Fahrenheit; "severe heat" above 110° F increases the damage to 1 hp per minute; "extreme heat" over 140° F increases the damage to 1d6 per round.
Deluxe Chocolate Golems
Chocolate golems, like chocolate truffles, can be produced with a variety of fillings. These variant chocolate golems have their Challenge Rating increased by +1 and their Spew Filling attack is replaced with one of the following special attacks:
Spew Entangling Filling (Ex): This chocolate golem can spit out streams of sweet and incredibly sticky filling from its hollow interior. If the golem succeeds in a ranged touch attack (30 ft. range, no range increments) its target is coated in the sticky goo and blinded and entangled for 1d4 rounds. The target can end this blindness by spending a full round action to remove the syrupy filling from their eyes. An entangled creature must make a DC 16 Reflex save or be glued to the floor and immobilized; they can break free by making a DC 16 Strength check, by dealing 12 points of damage to the goo with a slashing weapon (hits are automatic), or by applying universal solvent to the filling. The chocolate golem's hollow interior can hold enough filling for 12 shots, each shot corresponds to a gallon of filling for a standard-sized chocolate golem. A chocolate golem will typically have 1d6+6 shots of filling available when encountered. It is possible to "reload" a chocolate golem's filling with patience and a funnel. The DCs are Strength-based.
Spew Sickening Filling (Ex): This chocolate golem can spit out streams of disgustingly sweet, sticky filling from its hollow interior. If the golem succeeds in a ranged touch attack (30 ft. range, no range increments) its target is coated in the sticky goo and blinded for 1d4 rounds; furthermore, the target must succeed at a DC 16 Fortitude save or be sickened for 1d4 rounds. The target can end the blindness by spending a full round action to remove the syrupy filling from their eyes. The chocolate golem's hollow interior can hold enough filling for 12 shots, each shot corresponds to a gallon of filling for a standard-sized chocolate golem. A chocolate golem will typically have 1d6+6 shots of filling available when encountered. It is possible to "reload" a chocolate golem's filling with patience and a funnel. The save DC is Strength-based.
Spew Poisonous Filling (Ex): This chocolate golem can spit out streams of sweet, sticky, and poisoned filling from its hollow interior. If the golem succeeds in a ranged touch attack (30 ft. range, no range increments) its target is exposed to tarinav root poison. The chocolate golem's hollow interior can hold enough filling for 12 shots, each shot corresponds to a gallon of filling for a standard-sized chocolate golem. A chocolate golem will typically have 1d6+6 shots of filling available when encountered. It is possible to "reload" a chocolate golem's filling with patience and a funnel.
Tarinav Root Poison: Contact, Fortitude DC 16, primary damage 1d6 Dex, secondary damage 2d6 Dex.
Spew Nutty Filling (Ex): This chocolate golem can spit out streams of sweet, sticky filling mixed with nuts and nutshell shards from its hollow interior. If the golem succeeds in a ranged touch attack (30 ft. range, no range increments) its target takes 1d4 hp bludgeoning and piercing damage and is coated in the sticky goo and blinded for 1d4 rounds. The target can end this blindness by spending a full round action to remove the syrupy filling from their eyes. Also, whether the ranged touch succeeds or not, a 5 foot burst around the target is covered in nut shards (treat as caltrops). The chocolate golem's hollow interior can hold enough filling for 12 shots, each shot corresponds to a gallon of filling for a standard-sized chocolate golem. A chocolate golem will typically have 1d6+6 shots of filling available when encountered. It is possible to "reload" a chocolate golem's filling with patience and a funnel.
Construction
To create a chocolate golem 500 pounds of the finest chocolate must be melted, mixed with special spices and flavorings, and then cast into a mold carved into the shape of the golem's body. The materials cost 600 gold pieces. The mold is broken to remove the golem so cannot be reused. Creating the body requires a DC 13 Craft (sculpting) or Craft (cooking) check.
The materials cost includes 12 shots of sticky filling for the chocolate golem's Spew Filling attack. A chocolate golem can be created with fewer shots to reduce the initial expense. The sticky filling costs 20 gold pieces per shot, so creating an unloaded chocolate golem would save 240 gp from the materials cost.
Deluxe chocolate golems require expensive filling ingredients and special coatings on their hollow interior. These increase the materials cost to 1,100 gold pieces. Their special filling costs 50 gold pieces per shot, or 600 gp for a full reload.
CL 7th; Craft Construct, bull's strength, lesser geas, minor creation, prayer, caster must be at least 7th level; Price 3,600 gp (3,360 gp unloaded); Cost 2,100 gp (1,860 gp unloaded) + 120 XP.
Deluxe Chocolate Golems: Price 5,100 gp (4,500 unloaded); Cost 3,100 (2,500 unloaded) + 160 XP.
Lesser Chocolate Golems
Small Construct
Hit Dice: 1d10+10 (15 hp)
Initiative: -1
Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares)
Armor Class: 10 (+1 size, -1 Dex), touch 10, flat-footed 9
Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-5
Attack: Slam -5 melee (1d2-1)
Full Attack: Slam -5 melee (1d2-1)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: —
Special Qualities: Cold hardening, construct traits, darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, susceptibility to heat
Saves: Fort +0, Ref -1, Will -5
Abilities: Str 8, Dex 8, Con —, Int —, Wis 1, Cha 1
Skills: —
Feats: —
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 1/4
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: —
Level Adjustment: —
These novelties are sometimes used to amuse the children of the wealthy at parties, so are often called "party golems". A lesser chocolate golem is a halfling-sized version of a chocolate golem whose hollow interior is stuffed with sweets and trinkets. The golem is meant to be smashed to pieces like a piñata, so the goodies inside can be enjoyed by the party-goers.
A typical lesser chocolate golem stands 3 feet tall and weighs 25 pounds, its hollow interior can hold up to 15 pounds of filling.
Combat
Lesser chocolate golems are designed to be victims of "playful violence" rather than opponents. They are normally ordered to run around in circles when attacked to prolong the "game" of smashing them apart. If a lesser chocolate golem is ordered to fight, it can only feebly slap at an opponent with one of its limbs. Its slam attack is treated as a secondary attack and adds only half the golem’s Strength bonus to damage.
A lesser chocolate golem's cold hardening and susceptibility to heat traits are identical to those of a standard chocolate golem.
Construction
To create a lesser chocolate golem 25 pounds of the finest chocolate must be melted, mixed with special spices and flavorings, and then cast into a mold carved into the shape of the golem's body. The materials cost 50 gold pieces. The mold is broken to remove the golem so cannot be reused. Creating the body requires a DC 12 Craft (sculpting) or Craft (cooking) check.
CL 3rd; Craft Construct, bull's strength, caster must be at least 3rd level; Price 700 gp; Cost 375 gp + 26 XP.
Originally appeared in Dragon Magazine #228 ("The Dragon's Worstiary: Golems" by Anne Brown, 1996).