Perfection isn't required. Functionality is. Rules that
matter.
Again: I have zero problem with going
beyond an existing agreement, if all parties are informed and given the opportunity to address any concerns. I said as much earlier.
That's not what "the rules are suggestions" means. A suggestion will be
ignored whenever one likes, because suggestions have no force whatsoever.
Sure it is! Because what YOU think is a good reason may have
nothing whatever to do with what anyone else does. The fact that you consider it to be "the best reason" is exactly why it's a problem. As C.S. Lewis put it, "Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. [...T]hose who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." He was, of course, talking about a
significantly more serious topic than this, but the sentiment remains. Those who exploit their authority
on the belief that it is good for those they have authority over will do so with zeal and relish. They will be shocked to even consider opposition to their efforts. For do we not want to make things better?!
This is why rules that are
not merely suggestions, that are in fact actually quite durable
and only violated with discussion and consent are so important. You are quite right that many rules are bad rules. This is not an argument
against having rules. It is an argument
for having rules that have been tested and, within a reasonable bound of statistical precision, found to be
good ones, as
@pemerton said.
Rules, by definition, exist to serve some purpose. Rules are inherently teleological. Effective rules fulfill the purpose for which they were intended;
good rules are effective rules targeted at worthy purposes. Bad rules may be bad either because they are ineffective despite aiming at worthy targets, or because they aim at unworthy ones (regardless of whether they do so effectively.) The former should be reformed until they strike true. The latter should be struck down.