Deck of Many Things Horror Stories

[Thatwackyned]

So I'm playing in a campaign where our goal is to stop Ragnorock. I'm the party Klepto/Rogue and I find a Deck of cards. It starts talking to me, voices in my head. I get the rest of the party together, a cleric of nature, a war shaper and a sword sage. The voice tells me to play poker, so i tell everyone that we should play poker and that these are regular cards. My bluff is through the roof, though i really don't know better. So i draw five cards. The first Ace of Spades, the others hidden for the DM to play with. Instead of banished, the DM chose taken by a powerful God. So there i am, in a sphere with no opening and a voice telling my that I've been a very Bad Girl and that i chose very poorly.

I'm thinking the party will turn on me and i'll have to try to kill one.

What stories do you have about the Deck of Many Things?

 

[Zanticor]

Don't talk about that hideous thing! My thief was lost on some god forsaken hell and had the thing in his backpack. How much worse can thing get when your in hell you might ask? A lot! I can tell you. Now he lost both his soul and his body. Now his soul is used in limbo to power war machines and his body is comatose waiting for some devil to find and befoul it. Can I get an other card please?

Zanticor

 

[Nebten]

Oh let me tell you a story! I was a DM and I decided to pull out the ole' Deck of Many Things for my party to act as a tension breaker after along hard dungeon crawl. So far everybody seemed to fair well. The worst was when one guy lost XP, then regained it with the next card. But this last guy . . .
He goes for 2 draws, first one he draws the magic weapon and I roll it in front of him and its a Sunblade! Luckly they just went through the major undead horde. Then he pulls his second card . . . another major magic weapon, rolled . . . another Sunblade! Oh the HORROR! Now I got a ninja duel weilding Sunblades! In reality he sold the second one, but that only made things more interesting with his current increase in cash blow. Oh well, take the good with the bad. But it did bring up an interesting question, can a medium sized creature weild a small Sunblade . . . another forum topic.

 

[Jack Simth]

So I'm playing in a campaign where our goal is to stop Ragnorock. I'm the party Klepto/Rogue and I find a Deck of cards. It starts talking to me, voices in my head. I get the rest of the party together, a cleric of nature, a war shaper and a sword sage. The voice tells me to play poker, so i tell everyone that we should play poker and that these are regular cards. My bluff is through the roof, though i really don't know better. So i draw five cards. The first Ace of Spades, the others hidden for the DM to play with. Instead of banished, the DM chose taken by a powerful God. So there i am, in a sphere with no opening and a voice telling my that I've been a very Bad Girl and that i chose very poorly.

Ah, there's the mistake - you dealt. You needed to convince someone else to deal - because dealing, in "standard" poker with four people means drawing 20 cards and laying them out on the table...

I'm thinking the party will turn on me and i'll have to try to kill one.

What stories do you have about the Deck of Many Things?

Why would I mess around with something that random?

 

[slwoyach]

Find X

A+B+C+D=X

where

A= Kender played by me.
B= Deck of many things.
C= DM foolish enough to give a party containing a kender a deck of many things.
D= Bar full of backwoods yokels.

 

[DarkelvenSFi]

Find X

A+B+C+D=X

where

A= Kender played by me.
B= Deck of many things.
C= DM foolish enough to give a party containing a kender a deck of many things.
D= Bar full of backwoods yokels.

A bar full of catatonic / imprisoned patrons, a busty bar wench with a castle; now married to a kender who also 'found' a range of magical items and gold just lying around.

 

[calighis]

so my favorite xp was a bad game by a bad dm. At 4th level we simply encountered an elderly ogress gypsyin this wizards tower sitting behind a dusty table in the prison wing and monotonously repeating the only word she knew in common "draw". She of course was proferring the deck of many things. Then the party instantly kills her and takes the deck. Only one person draws and its the all brawn no brain palidan who gets rewarded with a keep.
At this point the DM gives up and ask me to run. So my first and obvious question is where would he like to put it and he decides to put it in the backyard of a very tiny trading post (less then 100 people)
My second objective is to get the deck of many things back from the party as soon as possible. This situation is made easier by the rouge who draws enmity from an outsider. A Baalor simply pops into the room and takes the deck.
Anyhow back to the keep....
I do not explain to him that this empty keep in a remote location makes an awfully tempting target for most roving bandits and goblinoid tribes. Those guys are kinda always on the look out for free gigantic defensible structures in the middle of nowhere. The party arrives back at the trading post the next day. The villagers are standing in front of it's gates with torches and pitchforks but no one dares knock on the door of this mysterious magical fortress. That is when the Palidan and co walk up with a key. Upon explaining it's origins and meaning to the towns people the crowd immedeatley percieves the danger of their situation and is outraged. None the less the knewly applied charsma bonus of the Pali goes some ways in keeping them from getting hanged then and there. Once the Palidan promises reinforcments for the structure the King's tax man immediatly starts writing out a bill and several fines to the tune of waaay more than the palidan can afford at 4th level.
To avoid debtor's prison the rouge of the group (ought to be a lawyer )at this point suggests donating the structure to a religious institution... perhaps the very same one the Palidan belongs to and perhaps getting those reinforcements from zealots willing to defend the faith. The Mage of the group casts charm person and....
The tax man finds this agreeable and is willing to temporarily grant some credit provided that the temple of Pelor pay a few remaining fines.
To make a long story short...
They saved the day but they didnt get to keep the keep.

 

[calighis]

so my favorite xp was a bad game by a bad dm. At 4th level we simply encountered an elderly ogress gypsyin this wizards tower sitting behind a dusty table in the prison wing and monotonously repeating the only word she knew in common "draw". She of course was proferring the deck of many things. Then the party instantly kills her and takes the deck. Only one person draws and its the all brawn no brain palidan who gets rewarded with a keep.
At this point the DM gives up and ask me to run. So my first and obvious question is where would he like to put it and he decides to put it in the backyard of a very tiny trading post (less then 100 people)
My second objective is to get the deck of many things back from the party as soon as possible. This situation is made easier by the rouge who draws enmity from an outsider. A Baalor simply pops into the room and takes the deck.
Anyhow back to the keep....
I do not explain to him that this empty keep in a remote location makes an awfully tempting target for most roving bandits and goblinoid tribes. Those guys are kinda always on the look out for free gigantic defensible structures in the middle of nowhere. The party arrives back at the trading post the next day. The villagers are standing in front of it's gates with torches and pitchforks but no one dares knock on the door of this mysterious magical fortress. That is when the Palidan and co walk up with a key. Upon explaining it's origins and meaning to the towns people the crowd immedeatley percieves the danger of their situation and is outraged. None the less the knewly applied charsma bonus of the Pali goes some ways in keeping them from getting hanged then and there. Once the Palidan promises reinforcments for the structure the King's tax man immediatly starts writing out a bill and several fines to the tune of waaay more than the palidan can afford at 4th level.
To avoid debtor's prison the rouge of the group (ought to be a lawyer )at this point suggests donating the structure to a religious institution... perhaps the very same one the Palidan belongs to and perhaps getting those reinforcements from zealots willing to defend the faith. The Mage of the group casts charm person and....
The tax man finds this agreeable and is willing to temporarily grant some credit provided that the temple of Pelor pay a few remaining fines.
To make a long story short...
They saved the day but they didnt get to keep the keep because they played it stupidly.

 

[Ahnehnois]

Someone once had the idea to make the 4th level fighter you get from the deck draw cards himself. And then his 4th-level fighters draw cards and then...

I didn't see anything to outlaw it (still don't). Now I would common-sense houserulke it away.

 

[Jack Simth]

They saved the day but they didnt get to keep the keep because they played it stupidly.

More "They didn't get to keep it because the DM went out of his way to make it painful to keep".