Delete Me

[Aurora]

A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her, "Go do something to prove them wrong! Why don't you learn all the state capitals or something?" The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up for two weeks studying.

The next party she goes to, some guy is making dumb blonde comments to her. She gets all indignant and claims, "I'm NOT a dumb blonde. In fact, I can name ALL the state capitals!"


The guy doesn't believe her, so she dares him to test her. He says "Okay, what's the Capital of Montana?"


The blonde tosses her hair in triumph and says, "That's easy! It's M!"

 

[Aeson]

I saw a blond joke like the one with the cop but it would not make it under the grandma rule.

 

[Aeson]

Q: Why did the blonde die in a helicopter crash?
A: She got cold and turned off the fan.


Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.

 

[Aurora]

What does a blonde say after sex?
"So...do you all play for the same team?"

 

[Tinker Gnome]

“To make it realistic, I’m going to tell her to give you a hard time.”

 

[Aurora]

This blonde heard that milk baths would make you beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde answered the door and the milkman said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 15 gallons or 1.5 gallons?"
The blonde said, "I want 15 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath."

The milkman asked, "Pasteurized?" The blonde said, "No. Just up to my b**bs."

 

[Tinker Gnome]

*Groans*

 

[Aurora]

*Groans*

Terrible isn't it.

 

[Tinker Gnome]

Terrible isn't it.

It is funny, just groan worthy too.

 

[Aurora]

A guy is walking down the street with some chicken wire under his arm. His neighbor sees him and asks what he has. The guy replies, "Its chicken wire and I'm going to catch some chickens." His neighbor says, "You fool, you can't catch chickens with chicken wire." Later that night, he sees the guy walking down the street dragging 12 chickens. The next day he sees him walking down the street with some duct tape under his arm. Once again he asks what the guy is up to. The guy says he has some duct tape and he is going to catch some ducks. He replies, "You fool, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Sure enough later that night, he sees the guy walking down the street dragging 12 ducks behind him. The next day, he sees the guy walking with something else under his arm. He asks what it is. The guy replies, "Its pussy willow." He says, "Hold on, let me get my hat."