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D&D General Did I ruin my DND Game/Group


So my dnd session just concluded a few minutes ago and I think I ruined it. So we haven't been able to play for a few weeks due to school and work stuff. so we all showed excited to play and it went well for the first few hours, but I have a friend who is childish most of the time saying random stuff and we regularly have arguments let's call him X, and we were arguing during the last few hours. So this came to ahead during the last hour when we were in combat, and he just starts bull shitting around DM: what are you doing. X: (bottle in mouth) I walk around the bottom floor and go to the bedrooms and set them on fire. DM: "you do what" X: "I set them on fire" DM: "alright" tells me and the other player smoke is rising from the floor. So this happens and when I and the other player are almost dead, he rushes up stairs and is going to attack with a improvised weapon. Then proceeds to spend around 5 minutes looking at his battle master maneuvers. And flipping through my book to find what they do. He and the other players with me down defeat it and find the mage, who kills himself and the other players is detained and me and X are arguing about earlier a the while he's got this big smirk on his face. So my character walks out and sees other player being marched toward the building. So my DM asks what do I do.
Until this point I have played a always helpful ranger, the other player and X are complete naughty words, for x its both. And I say my character leaves saying both of them are naughty words. And I had a few sessions earlier talked about how my motivation fits in to the group, saving my parents from a life of exile. Everyone else stares and my DM goes quiet. We then spend the 10 minutes just sitting there the dm quiet, he then starts mumbling about he's tired and this session was a disaster. The DM is mad about my character leaving so abrupt, even though we talked about it earlier. So other player says he doesn't care if we're playing as long as DM up for it. And x is just like it was good but I'm not that into dnd. And we should do other things, "The world is our oyster." And so our DM says he doesn't want to run if we're not into it. So we're taking another month hiatus.

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Hmm. First of all, this kind of thing is very common with new/casual/younger players/groups, so your problem is very normal. There's a LOT of things you can do about it. In my experience, the best thing to do is to talk to your DM, and X, individually and outside of the game. Tell your DM about how you feel regarding X's actions. See if it's bothering your DM too. See if they have any ideas.

Talking to X is a bit trickier. Keep it casual and try not to get upset or argue. Just explain that you'd like less at-the-table conflict in the game (games can be fun with in-story conflict, but they fall apart with at-the-table conflict). For the game to go on (to go on well, at least) you have to be closer to on the same page, on the same side, in telling a story that's fun for everyone.

You can do "anything" in D&D, but that doesn't mean that random chaos is a good idea for the game. It's just a game, and that means there are some rules. Not just for how it plays combat-wise and exploration-wise, but also for how the players and the DM interact with each other.


I mean last night was just really bad and I don't know why. Like most nights theirs a little of that. But he just kept complaining about being tired. So I don't know if him being tired or what, but now were waiting another month to play, this is my third group, second group and this group is the same minus one person.

EDIT: also DM who Tolkien style world builder who has literal pages on advanced economic stuff in the world i think that contributed.


No rule is inviolate
Are you having fun with these people, or are you tolerating them so you have someone to enjoy playing D&D with?

If you're having fun and this was an aberrant argument, talk with the DM about what you're getting and not getting from the game. They might have some ideas about X.

If you're tolerating some of the players, don't. That's not a healthy social outing. And that's what D&D is, a social outing. Unless you're being forced to attend, you should be choosing to hang out with people who make you enjoy the game more and bring out the best in you.


no there my friends but all of them are just like whatever next dnd game is next month, and it feels like im the only one who cares

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