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D&D General Did I ruin my DND Game/Group


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Zanganorn

Villager
Its that my dm and I have put a lot of time and resouces into it (books, minis, etc.), and other player has to, I think I need to resolve my o own problems with X
 

Doc_Klueless

Doors and Corners
Supporter
It's that my dm and I have put a lot of time and resources into it (books, minis, etc.), and other player has, too
Just don't fall into the Sunk Cost Fallacy. The fact that these things have been expended should not be the driving reason to continue, in other words. I think all of us here have fallen into that before.

For example, I've only recently come to realize that the reason I've been jumping through hoops to play/run RPGs is because I have 40 years and thousands of $$$ tied up into it. So I was doing it because I had this large money and resources sunk cost. But I wasn't really enjoying myself as much as I used to and I was chasing a gamer's high that just wasn't going to happen again. Plus was still costing me a bunch of cash. Once I figured that out and decided to step back, it's felt like a huge weight has lifted and I'm energized to do other things.

Continuing a D&D Game should be because you want to play D&D, not because you've spent a lot of time and effort on D&D. If that makes sense.

However, from what I've read in this thread, it looks like you'd really like to play it. Sooo...
I think I need to resolve my o own problems with X
Probably. And not just because of the D&D game. X is a friend of yours. Friends should talk things out so that these things that irritate you don't grow and fester and ruin a friendship.

Just do it gently and with care.
 

Oofta

Legend
Honestly? It sounds like X did everything they could to sabotage the game. There's not really much you can do about that. It's hard when a group falls apart, especially when it's with friends but it happens.

If you enjoy the game, find a different group. Doesn't mean you can't still hang out with your friends, but maybe you should be playing Exploding Kittens instead or doing something else entirely. You can lead a horse to water, but D&D is about everybody getting together because they enjoy playing the game. X doesn't.
 

aco175

Legend
You could try and have a side quest with just you and the DM. If both of you are into playing more than the others, you can work out a few things just by playing together.

The group I play with today is not the same group from High School or the Army. Some players just wanted to hang out and some played just to role dice and kill things. They were not bad people, but D&D just was not their thing. I only had a few people in middle school and maybe HS that would sabotage the game with attacking other PCs and such.
 

Nagol

Unimportant
Actually, it sounds already ruined. You may have provided a finishing blow, but the battle for the soul of the group was already lost. You have at least one player who doesn't want to play and is acting out, at least one player who wants to be casual, a DM who wants a serious game, and yourself who I didn't get a read on.

If you want a serious game like the DM, talk to him about starting a different group and spend the times this group of friends gets together doing something else. Otherwise, just spend the times this group of friends gets together doing something else.
 

jayoungr

Legend
Supporter
Suggestion: The new D&D Essentials Kit has some guidelines on playing one-on-one, i.e., one player and one DM. Maybe you and the DM could try that, if you want to keep playing in this world you've been working on?
 


Oofta

Legend
Suggestion: The new D&D Essentials Kit has some guidelines on playing one-on-one, i.e., one player and one DM. Maybe you and the DM could try that, if you want to keep playing in this world you've been working on?
I've actually played quite a bit of D&D 1-on-1 because for a while my wife and I were moving around a lot for a while. It can be quite fun, and it was a good learning experience for both of us.
 

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