Do we really need Monkeys?

[ivocaliban]

I don't think anyone has brought up the distinction between monkeys (spider monkeys, marmosets, tamarins, macaques, etc.) and apes (gorillas, chimpanzees, orangutans, gibbons, etc.) yet. It's clear that apes are the superior choice and there's simply no reason to have monkeys. With their higher cognitive ability, use of language, and complex social groups apes are simply better than monkeys in every way. Furthermore, I've heard that the lemurs in the Simian Races sequel The Complete Prosimians are just as cute as monkeys...and will likely replace them in most campaigns.

 

[Algolei]

I hope my DM doesn't see this thread or he might try to take away my half-celestial monkey!

Fly, my pretty! Eh, heh heh heh heh heh!...

 

[demiurge1138]

I hope my DM doesn't see this thread or he might try to take away my half-celestial monkey!

Fly, my pretty! Eh, heh heh heh heh heh!...

You bring up a good point. Without monkeys, there is no room for flying monkeys. And without flying monkeys, the game just isn't really D&D anymore. You might as well be asking for "d20-monkey-free".

Demiurge out.

 

[drnuncheon]

I think you're drawing a false equivalency between monkeys and great apes. It's pretty clear that the Complete Primate, while claiming to deal with all primates, really short-changes the monkey because none of the PrCs are really designed for accommodate creatures whose size category is less than Small.

Complete Primate sucked. They reprinted the Vanara from OA and spent half the book on it. I wanted more pages on bonobos and chimpanzees.

J

 

[francisca]

I think you're drawing a false equivalency between monkeys and great apes.

Of course! Silly me. You are like, so.......correct! Monkeys != Great Apes. Does that mean that Joshua and I are both correct? Each book dealing with the respective branches?

A thought just struck me. And man, did it freaking hurt. I'm thinking about pressing charges..... Now, where was I. Oh! Yeah! If we eliminate monkeys, then we eliminate the creatures who started off using simple tools. Without those tools, we'd have no swords. Without swords, then Hey Man, it ain't D&D. Think those dang lizardfolk are going to share their stuff with the mammals? Uh-uh. Not in my experience. Of course, I could houserule......

 

[Doctor Shaft]

I think part of the problem with the monkey is that it's so pigeon-holed. I mean, if you're a monkey, you must be a poo-flinging, fruit and seed eating freak. I'd rather the much more instrospective ape. But the flavor text is so stifling, there's just no room. Plus, the Stunning Poo feat is utterly worthless.

Plus, I hate the fact that you have to roll a d100 to determine whether your monkey actually wears his magic item on the correct slot. It was so frustrating when I got a mythril chain shirt with the damage resistance, and my monkey decided to wear it on his head! DM ruled that I get no bonus for that.

 

[XCorvis]

You bring up a good point. Without monkeys, there is no room for flying monkeys. And without flying monkeys, the game just isn't really D&D anymore. You might as well be asking for "d20-monkey-free".

Demiurge out.

Nothing freaks out the players like having four flying monkeys bust in through the windows of a lightning rail car while a cloaked and masked figure enters through the door and screams "I am the Monkey Master!"

 

[nonamazing]

I've never used the monkey rules in 3.5 and I see no reason to start doing so. I've seen too many munchinkin monkeys break a game.

On the other hand, I do find that real-life monkeys are an invaluable aid to playing the game. I have a monkey dice roller, and he's been a lot of help. Well, he's more of a dice flinger than an dice roller, but you get the basic idea.

 

[Mad Mac]

People, people, you're all over-complicating a very simple situation. Let me break it down for you.

1. We all know Monkeys only come from Africa.

2. My home-brewed campaign setting doesn't have a large, continent labled "Africa" in big letters, anywhere!

3. Clearly, there is no place for Monkeys in the core rules, thus their inclusion in the MM automatically corrupts my homebrewed campaign setting, and thus, all of D&Ds.

Think about it...even if I try to hide the monkey from my players, one of them might look at the Monster Manual, and during a session...say "Monkey" aloud! That would immediately destroy all sense of versimilitude, and ruin the session! What if, (gasp) someone wants to play a monkey? Or take one as an animal companion? It's horrifying!

Edit: It's been pointed out by some wise guy that my home-brew isn't played by everybody. Ok fine....take a look at the campaign maps for Eberron and FR. Do you see "Africa" anywhere? My point stands, so there!

 

[diaglo]

what about the purple guy running around saying: Grape Ape.

or the little sidekick Apu monkey with his fez.

or the big CLimb a tall building one handed guy with Faye Dunaway in the other.