Dumb D&D Questions

[Delemental]

Can you use Polymorph Any Object to turn a ranger into a glass of water?

Only if his name is Zan.

Okay, new one:

Scenario: Opponent A is an ogre with five levels of rogue and has both proficiency and Weapon Focus with the spiked chain. He is currently wielding a +1 icy burst spiked chain, but it is only Medium size.

Opponent B is a half-elf 7th level monk with Vow of Poverty from BoED. He is currently fighting defensively, but has 4 points shifted into Power Attack. He has more than 5 ranks in Tumble, and the Improved Grapple feat.

Opponent C is a drow 6th level psion (telepath). He has not yet activated any powers, but wears a crystal mask of dread and boots of skating.

Question: Can I take this feat I found on the Internet? It totally kicks a**!!

 

[Drew]

Um...How is Ravenloft like a writing desk?

 

[Greatwyrm]

If you have an Ettin w/ class levels in bard & ranks in Perform (Yodel), can it sustain two bardic music abilities at once?

I don't know, but I've got a guy that's been begging me to let him play a squaredance calling bard.

"Flank with yer partner,
flank with yer Rogue.
Stab him real quick
and do se do.

Now promenade..."

No. I'm not kidding.

 

[Mystery Man]

"The Yodeling Ettin" just screams to be an inn in my campaign now...

 

[Jdvn1]

If you have an Ettin w/ class levels in bard & ranks in Perform (Yodel), can it sustain two bardic music abilities at once?

Hm, what about a hydra?

Could they get a synergy bonus for singing as a choir?

 

[Kahuna Burger]

I don't know, but I've got a guy that's been begging me to let him play a squaredance calling bard.

"Flank with yer partner,
flank with yer Rogue.
Stab him real quick
and do se do.

Now promenade..."

No. I'm not kidding.

that is a thing of beauty... my only question is perform sing or peform oratory?

 

[Ankh-Morpork Guard]

Constantly feed him lard, encourage him not to exercise, and make sure he eats plenty of organ meat.
*rimshot*

Ow.

Reading that may have actually caused physical harm.

 

[Zander]

If you have an Ettin w/ class levels in bard & ranks in Perform (Yodel), can it sustain two bardic music abilities at once?

Yes. An ettin has two fully-functional heads including brains, mouths and vocal chords. There's nothing to stop an ettin's heads speaking separately, so they could yodel independently as well.

What happens if a halfling Shapechanges into a Purple Worm, swallows an ogre whole, then turns back into a halfling?

Just as the halfling's clothes and objects carried shapechange, so too do the contents of its stomach. So the ogre would shrink proportionately. Chances are, the halfling's gastric juices would kill it.

Zander "in a serious mood" Oi

 

[Zander]

I don't know, but I've got a guy that's been begging me to let him play a squaredance calling bard.

"Flank with yer partner,
flank with yer Rogue.
Stab him real quick
and do se do.

Now promenade..."

No. I'm not kidding.

You could have an ettin bard that squaredance calls with one head and yodels with the other. I'm not kidding either.

 

[DreadPirateMurphy]

Um...How is Ravenloft like a writing desk?

Tracy and Laura Hickman wrote on both?