D&D 5E Eberron: from Maltese Falcon to The Newsroom

[Windjammer]

So, the new book is here. Some questions early impressions and reviews haven't quite touched on yet include: Just what is this? Who is it for? And... why? But let's start from the beginning.

At its inception, Eberron was grandiose in vision and vast in expense. Enworld would discuss how heroes could conceivably traverse the miles upon miles of so vast a continent, how PCs could reach Khorvaire’s icy and forbidding frontiers. Back in 2003, Eberron characters were up against foes with outsized ambitions, flaws, and machinations. PCs were caught in political turmoil, espionage, and intrigue all at once.

In 2019, Eberron doesn’t read so much like The Maltese Falcon—it reads like a particularly drab season of The Newsroom. That show's decidedly middle-class characters are more at home in this new Eberron than an Indiana Jones or Jack T. Colton.

Can you handle the excitement? Can you handle....the truth???

In its defense, the book doesn’t deny this, suggesting at one point—without a whiff of irony—that PCs be journalists with “an unflinching commitment to the truth” who “might be in conflict with the chronicle's management over priorities.”

Can you imagine the tales? How I stood up to my editor who wouldn’t run my headline, or, How I tweeted about the boss’s industry donors, or, How I met YOUR mother!—and more, by Level 5 Halfling Fighter.

It’s all pretty hilarious, if didn’t come at the expense of the setting itself.

Take the Talenta Plains. Once they were a forbidding land, far, far away, sealed in part behind perilous mountain ranges, with the tribes killing off soldiers of Empire. In short, that 19th century, Imperialist setting immortalized in Kipling’s “When you’re wounded and left on Afghanistan’s plains,” with "The Great Game” the blueprint of any Eberron campaign featuring agents sneaking in, spies sneaking out, of the mountain range, with undercover warfare of tribes against Empire. Peter Hopkirk couldn’t have imagined it better, and it was pretty big news when stories of that scope hit D&D tables in 2003.

When you’re wounded and left on Afghanistan’s The Talenta plains...

Whatever that land once was has, in 2019, become a tourist destination, with visitors of all stripe passing through for a scenic view. "More foreigners visit the Plains than at any time in the past. Settlers and merchants cross the Plains as they make their way to Q'barra, and they clash with Q'barran bandits. The Valenar elves ride through the Plains in search of adventure." Coming next: guided tour buses for Sharn's retirees!

The crowning of kings, once a topic of (again) grand espionage and even greater betrayal, has devolved into the opportunity for an op-ed. The accompanying in-game fiction celebrates this fact in miserably pedestrian newspaper articles for the PCs to emulate. “Growing up on the streets of the Callestan district in Sharn, I learned not to put my faith in anything I couldn't see or hold. I think that's why my editor sent me to Flamekeep to cover” blah blah.

Nothing drives home the shallow, unambitious, pedestrian and downright contemporary nature of characters in this new setting than journalists whose sole accomplishment and merit for consideration is to have been born in a district. Impressive!

None of this is helped by font choices less at home in D&D than 1920s Call of Cthulthu—again, a setting which deliberately pits unremarkable, pedestrian characters of slim abilities against a world they do not comprehend and are not meant to master. All of that works in Cthulhu, but is jarringly out of place for Level 5+ Fighters and Mages.

When a traveller in north central Massachusetts takes the wrong fork, he ends up... with odd font choices.

It’s not just the writer characters (depicted and suggested for PC play) that are so mundane, it’s the stories of this new setting too.

In the below, I only changed proper names of persons and places, and left the rest of the story intact.

“Zsa Zsa Gabor is the queen of high society in New York. Her activities and those of the Hilton children account for just as much newsprint as their father, Conrad Hilton, used to. Her eldest daughter, Constance, shocked society last week when she publicly denounced the current administration. The dalliances of younger siblings Paris and Nicole sell more issues of the New York tabloids whenever such are reported, and the wedding of middle
sister Paris and Trisha will surely be the biggest social event of 2006.
The Hilton fortune is tied to the City of Towers. Hilton gold funded the construction of many of the towers of New York, and the family owns vast sections of the city. You've likely heard of the Sixty Families of New York, considered the guiding lights of the city. Most assume
that these luminaries are ancient and established, their status tied to a government decree. In fact, when the
Hiltons built their mansion on Fifth Avenue, they ordered the architects to design a banquet hall that would seat sixty families and their servants. The original Sixty Families were those that received standing invitations to the first Hilton Gala. Though the list has remained generally stable through the years, just last year Paris Hilton expelled the Hyatt family and gave their place to Marriott line—a surprising advancement for a family that began as East Coast hooligans. Anyone who strives to rise in New York society must earn the favor of the Sixty. Similarly, those who seek to explore and adventure in the wake of recent foreign wars can surely find patrons among these elite. And from our desks, we will be watching to see which families will be next to rise and fall.”

As you read that story, ask yourself these questions:
1. Is this a tall tale of mighty adventure in a pulp noir world, or is it this some mediocre writing about gentrification and real estate?
2. If given the choice to adventure in, which world would you pick?
3. If given the choice, which book would you rather buy to inspire you as a GM to come up with great adventures? This one:

...or this one:

 

[Parmandur]

Oh, man, the newspaper stuff is one of the best parts of this awesome book.

The modernity of the setting is a big selling point too.

 

[Leatherhead]

I'm disappointed that this review didn't have a Newsies reference.

 

[Cap'n Kobold]

In its defense, the book doesn’t deny this, suggesting at one point—without a whiff of irony—that PCs be journalists with “an unflinching commitment to the truth” who “might be in conflict with the chronicle's management over priorities.”

Sounds like a pretty good reason why the PCs might start investigating mysterious disappearances in the slums, the truth about the Lost City of the Dwarves, or why the management might send them far away to a savage and dangerous continent to cover an expedition delving deep into the jungle.
And forget their return tickets.

Take the Talenta Plains. Once they were a forbidding land, far, far away, sealed in part behind perilous mountain ranges, with the tribes killing off soldiers of Empire. In short, that 19th century, Imperialist setting immortalized in Kipling’s “When you’re wounded and left on Afghanistan’s plains,” with "The Great Game” the blueprint of any Eberron campaign featuring agents sneaking in, spies sneaking out, of the mountain range, with undercover warfare of tribes against Empire. Peter Hopkirk couldn’t have imagined it better, and it was pretty big news when stories of that scope hit D&D tables in 2003.

When you’re wounded and left on Afghanistan’s The Talenta plains...

Whatever that land once was has, in 2019, become a tourist destination, with visitors of all stripe passing through for a scenic view. "More foreigners visit the Plains than at any time in the past. Settlers and merchants cross the Plains as they make their way to Q'barra, and they clash with Q'barran bandits. The Valenar elves ride through the Plains in search of adventure." Coming next: guided tour buses for Sharn's retirees!

I'm seeing a bit of a difference between "Invaders no longer get eaten then murdered, so adventurous and driven people are now starting to visit." and "Regular Saga tours destination."

The crowning of kings, once a topic of (again) grand espionage and even greater betrayal, has devolved into the opportunity for an op-ed. The accompanying in-game fiction celebrates this fact in miserably pedestrian newspaper articles for the PCs to emulate. “Growing up on the streets of the Callestan district in Sharn, I learned not to put my faith in anything I couldn't see or hold. I think that's why my editor sent me to Flamekeep to cover” blah blah.

Nothing drives home the shallow, unambitious, pedestrian and downright contemporary nature of characters in this new setting than journalists whose sole accomplishment and merit for consideration is to have been born in a district. Impressive!

I believe the intention was to mimic the newspaper articles of the time that that part of Eberron is reflecting. Journalists would sometimes talk about their ordinary origins in order to establish their "everyman" credentials for the rest of the series. I'm pretty sure it was a deliberate choice to evoke a specific time and genre.

None of this is helped by font choices less at home in D&D than 1920s Call of Cthulthu

1920s Call of Cthulu uses 1920s-esque fonts to help conjure up the feel of the 1920s. That is the same reason that Eberron uses them.

In the below, I only changed proper names of persons and places, and left the rest of the story intact.

“Zsa Zsa Gabor is the queen of high society in New York. Her activities and those of the Hilton children account for just as much newsprint as their father, Conrad Hilton, used to. Her eldest daughter, Constance, shocked society last week when she publicly denounced the current administration. The dalliances of younger siblings Paris and Nicole sell more issues of the New York tabloids whenever such are reported, and the wedding of middle
sister Paris and Trisha will surely be the biggest social event of 2006.
The Hilton fortune is tied to the City of Towers. Hilton gold funded the construction of many of the towers of New York, and the family owns vast sections of the city. You've likely heard of the Sixty Families of New York, considered the guiding lights of the city. Most assume
that these luminaries are ancient and established, their status tied to a government decree. In fact, when the
Hiltons built their mansion on Fifth Avenue, they ordered the architects to design a banquet hall that would seat sixty families and their servants. The original Sixty Families were those that received standing invitations to the first Hilton Gala. Though the list has remained generally stable through the years, just last year Paris Hilton expelled the Hyatt family and gave their place to Marriott line—a surprising advancement for a family that began as East Coast hooligans. Anyone who strives to rise in New York society must earn the favor of the Sixty. Similarly, those who seek to explore and adventure in the wake of recent foreign wars can surely find patrons among these elite. And from our desks, we will be watching to see which families will be next to rise and fall.”

As you read that story, ask yourself these questions:
1. Is this a tall tale of mighty adventure in a pulp noir world, or is it this some mediocre writing about gentrification and real estate?

Why not both?
There are 5-10 plot hooks for games covering everything between high-society crime and gritty street investigation to an action-filled romp through dark jungles and trap-filled hidden ruins in that article alone. More experienced DMs could no-doubt spin off even more, depending on their group's preference.

3. If given the choice, which book would you rather buy to inspire you as a GM to come up with great adventures? This one:

...or this one:

In one, we have people risking the anger of the spirits of those long dead to seek out forbidden knowledge. They wager their lives and souls for a chance of enrichment, material or spiritual. Where will such treasures and revelations guide them next, and how deep will they be willing to delve?
In the other, a warforged carries a box.

 

[PsyzhranV2]

... what the bloody piss are you on about?

No. Just no.

Also did you seriously come back from a 7 year hiatus just to start a flame war?

 

[tetrasodium]

Sounds like a pretty good reason why the PCs might start investigating mysterious disappearances in the slums, the truth about the Lost City of the Dwarves, or why the management might send them far away to a savage and dangerous continent to cover an expedition delving deep into the jungle.
And forget their return tickets.

Yellow journalism is pretty evident in many of the newspaper clippings scattered through Rising so might as well use lots of it when a patron like this comes up. It's too bad those disapperances are because a some house Vadalis maebreeder failed to secure the cages on the latest magebred predator he's trying to prepare & house Vadalis just purchased a full page color ad in the next six issues about two hours after they confronted the magebreeder so the boss has made it clear that the party needs to find a different culprit... Although on the up side, an Orien courrier just delivered the party a box containing a 3 charge wand of fireball, a +1 longsword, some gold, & more importantly a fully written tale of their harrowing encounter chasing after that insane Aberrant marked criminal causing the disappearances

Edit: Perhaps the box will become the start of a long & lucrative career framing unsympathetic individuals to cver up the crimes of rich & well connected individuals every so often too

 

[Tony Vargas]

I know newspapers are of waning relevance in today's world, and even in the last decade or two of the 20th century, and I note the OP was born the same year I started playing D&D, and may have only childhood memories of watching a repeat of some old show or movie where a reporter was the hero.

Maybe it's just a tired old trope.

But Eberron was conceived as mixing film noir in with D&D fantasy, and as a device to bring that feel, newspaper bits seem spot-on.

 

[Undrave]

It's not quite the 1920s but this is a good inspiration I think...

Now, The News | Decoder Ring Theatre

decoderringtheatre.com

Newspaper were always cheaply written and in a haste. What's important is reading between the lines.

 

[Undrave]

I'm disappointed that this review didn't have a Newsies reference.

"EXTREE EXTREE! READ ALL ABOUT IT! MURDERHOBOS SAVE THE CITY! READ ALL ABOUT IT! ONLY IN THE CHRONICLE!"

 

[Parmandur]

1920s Call of Cthulu uses 1920s-esque fonts to help conjure up the feel of the 1920s. That is the same reason that Eberron uses them.

Boom.